Dear Diary:

A lady came over today... from Child Protective Services...

She knocked on our door and walked right in... We all had a little conversation

Lady: Hi, I'm from Child Protective Services-

Everyone: Hi

Lady: .... Hi- Anyways, where's the child?

Finland: Peter's in his room :333

Lady: Is he the twelve year old with the purple hat that ran away?

Me: No, that's me

Lady: ...... And how old are you?

Me:  About 17

Lady: Wow, okay. Who called the police yesterday?

Norway: I did

Lady: You are-?

Norway: His big brother

Me: No you're not

Lady: Is he or is he not?

Me: ...... He technically is-

She scribbled a couple things in some sort of notebook and then kept asking us stuff

Lady: I usually protect CHILDREN, but I'll make an exception here since you're still technically a minor. Please tell me who you live with... And what you think about them

Me: ..... I live with my... brother       Nor- LUKAS... He's an okay person... but he forces me to call him big brother and is very overprotective sometimes

Lady: And how does that make you feel?

Me: It makes me feel.... a little insecure about myself and sad

Norway: *GLARING*

Lady: Who else do you live with?

Me: I live with Den- MATHIAS... He's my um...... uh...

Denmark: Dad

Me: He's my dad- wait what?

Lady: Are you both blood related?

Me: No

Lady: Where are your parents?

Norway: He doesn't have parents

Lady: *whispers* Are they dead?

Me: No. I just don't have them

Lady: ..... Nobody here is blood related to you?

Norway: I am-

Finland: I adopted him as a son! Sort of...

Lady: Wasn't the pineapple guy his dad?

Norway: He's my dad

Denmark: CHOKE ME-

Sweden: Please stop-

Lady: And who are YOU?

Sweden: I'm Sweden

Lady: .....

Finland: HAHAHA, STUPID FOREIGNER! HE MEANS HE'S FROM SWEDEN

Sweden: wife-

Lady: ..... You're his wife?

Finland: D-Don't be silly!

Lady: ..... ANYWAYS! Why did you run away?

Me: I was chasing my puffin...

Lady: ..... okay... I'm going to be very honest here. Your family seems like a bunch of freaks. This is a toxic environment for someone like you

Me: wut

Lady: So you're coming with me and we'll find your parents... Where are you from?

Me: Iceland-

Lady: WHOOO, WHAT'S THAT? HAHAHA- pack your stuff

Norway: You can't take him away!

Lady:  *shows everyone legal stuff* This says otherwise. I'll be also taking the other child

Finland: BUT PETER IS VERY YOUNG AND GOING THROUGH PHASES!

Sealand:  *walks in* Ey, you ol' sluts! It's ya boi peperoni here!

Lady: ..... I'll be taking this one then

So... That's the story of how a lady forced me to travel to Iceland and start searching for my nonexistent parents

The farewell was pretty sad, but we all knew I was going to return after the lady decides I'm annoying as fuck

Also, Mr. Puffin followed us so yeah

And now I'm traveling in a plane with a woman who doesn't even know my name

Yay

-Iceland

I have no idea anymore just go with it