Just say the word and let me be
You've broken me
Please say the word so I'll be free
I'm better off lonely

• • •

I was being watched very closely, the eyes on me being intense and calculating. My thick tail waved back and forth as I climbed through the undergrowth, my paws being careful with each step I took.

It was about a month after my official entrance into Princeton's pack as a member. So far, I have been getting only welcoming responses from those who desired to give it. Those who didn't like my joining said nothing — at least not yet.

The month was anything but leisurely, though. As June moved into July, it was getting hotter, making it harder for me to shift at anytime but mid-evening to early morning. The pelt of a snow leopard was not built for heated climates. It's thick, rough texture was meant for chilly mountain tops and snowy seasons, and we were meant to blend in with the stony grays of the mountainside, not the lush green of forests. Feline was starting to get irritated at the loss of prey when she hunted.

Her frustrations were not lost on the human side, or on Princeton for the matter. Her irritation had grown, and she was making me restless, so I decided to allow her out a bit earlier than planned. Doing so was probably a mistake on my part because she was stomping around and grumbling, throwing an absolute childish tantrum. She tore up a few plants, bit a few low-hanging tree branches, growled some profanities that I rarely use in the form of a human.

It was during her tantrum that I felt a presence enter our head. I was confused for a brief moment, as was she, but the voice, similar to Princeton's, but not quite his, chuckled, "I understand you are frustrated that you've yet to catch anything. But does stomping truly solve your problem?"

Princeton's wolf. I have heard him a few times before when Princeton and I would test our link and the mate bond that connected us. He has reached out to Feline before, to me, introducing himself but never mentioning a name. I had questioned Princeton about it one day as we were spending time together.

"How come he hasn't ever told me or Feline his name?" I asked, fiddling with one of the super nice watches on his dresser. He hadn't minded my snooping, he was actually encouraging it. "It doesn't bother us that he hasn't," I added, in case he took that the wrong way, "Feline and I are just curious — naturally."

Princeton hummed, his brown eyes watching me warmly. "A wolf never reveals their name to anyone other than their human self and their mate. It is a silent rule to keep hushed the name of your wolf, because the wolf is the identity that belongs to the Goddess. In our world, in our eyes, the gift She gave us was created specifically for us. Down to the color of our coats, even if genetics can be argued and proven to have a reasoning."

I watched the hand twitch to the right on the watch as time continued onward. I set the watch down where I found it and looked at him through the mirror, where I locked eyes with him.  "Then how is it he's not told me yet, if we're mates?"

"He will most likely reveal it after being marked and mated — those are how our bond is sealed for eternity and unlocks the full acceptance of one another," the alpha responded as he smiled a little. "Why do you call her Feline?"

I had expected the question at some point, and my lips twitched when I heard the knowing rumble of amusement come from her in my thoughts. I turned around and walked toward the bed where Princeton was lounging. "She's never told me her name."

Princeton looked surprised. "No? Does she not have one?" he asked, looking interested now as his hand reached out to lace his fingers through mine as they rested on the mattress.

"I'm sure she does," I responded, relaxing as the pleasant tingles toed soothingly across my skin as we touched. "But the felines don't like to give us an identity until they feel it is the right time. It's not that she doesn't trust
me, or she doesn't like me," I continued, running my thumb across his hand in content, "she just knows when she will. If that makes sense. Some felines will give their names at childhood, others won't until they're old. Names in the eyes of a feline shifter have little meaning. They would much rather take on the name of their human counterpart, or just be called 'my cat' or 'my feline'."

"Hmm," Princeton murmured, tugging me and having me crawl closer so I could fall in his arms. "Go on."

I snuggled into his embrace, no longer hesitant like months before. He knew where I was comfortable touching, how I reacted to certain movements and touches in his arms. "If a feline reveals their name, it's not really considered huge or special. The bond we have with our cats is one we know at birth. They are born as cubs just as we are born as babies, wailing and in need of a mother's touch. A mother feline and her cub have the same bond as their human counterparts, and the mother feline will give their cub a name. Only she and that cub will know that name — not the siblings, not the father. Scent and human appearance and personality is how they identity one another."

"Amazing," he murmured as he trailed his fingers up and down my bare arms. "It's not much different from us, really. Scent, human, and personality. Trust and bond at birth, little knowledge of the world."

I smile softly as I turned in his arms and wrapped mine around his neck, playing with the hair at his nape. He rested his forehead against mine and I said, "I call her Feline because even though names aren't considered a big deal, she's been through as much shit as me. She lost the cub I did, she lost her Chosen as I had. Through all of that, we had one another. Through what my parents did, we protected each other. I refused to let her be thrown to the side when my parents chased hers out of their own bodies. She's mine and I am hers. But she deserves to be called something, so I call her Feline."

I like that name. Even if I don't tell you what my real one is, the snow leopard in question mused distantly from the corner of my head. I like it better than my birth name.

I'm sure you do, I replied, sending a mental nudge her way as I buried my face in Princeton's chest as he released comforting rumbles from his body.

The brush of fur against mine caused me to whip away from the memory like the lash of claws against water.

"Have you no answer?" the voice questioned with a soft chuckle, and I turned my eyes to the large beige wolf that had managed to sneak up on me.

"Lost in thought," Feline replied to the wolf, long tail whacking against his face playfully as she trudged through the undergrowth. The wolf growled playfully from behind us and followed. "What're you growling about now, mister? Are you embarrassed my tail hit you?"

Another growl. "Careful, mate of mine. If I didn't know better, I would think you'd be disrespecting your alpha," he responded, his paw steps growing heavier and quicker as he tried to match our pace and catch up.

"Blasphemy, complete and utter nonsense," the snow leopard replied offhandedly, feigning passiveness. She navigated through some thick bramble that proved to only be an obstacle for the large feline. "I would never think of doing such a horrible thing. You being an alpha is the only thing you have going for you, so taking that away would emasculate you completely I think."

It took everything in the human part of me not to shift back just so I could laugh. Feline would for sure keep Princeton and is wolf on their toes if I wasn't doing so.

Feline could feel my amusement, and it seemed to only encourage her, as she continued while ignoring Princeton's playful and challenging growls, "Of course, it would be a shame to best you in a spar in front of your pack. Imagine the atrocity of that!"

"You're playing with fire, my leopardess," the wolf cooed in our head. It was then we realized we could no longer hear his paw steps following behind us any longer, Feline having been enjoying teasing him to much to pay attention to her surroundings. "Words like that could land you into some serious trouble. Perhaps I need to remind you who leads here."

Feline pushed through, her tail flicking back and forth against the environment around her, keeping her steady and balanced, while her whiskers brushed against objects that she passed, getting an idea of what she was stepping into.

Feline circled a large tree and lifted her paws onto it, pushing against it and digging her claws in. She was testing the tree's ability to hold her if she could climb it and the toughness of the bark. When she started to drag her claws down, they got halfway stuck, digging in deep. Satisfied with the strength of the tree and the thickness of the bark, she haunches her shoulders and begins to climb. Her long, thick tail flicked back and forth as she climbed.

Snow leopards in the wild are specialized in rock climbing, but they can be known to climb trees if the occasion calls for it. Eyes narrowed in on a branch as she climbed, and she paused to test the sturdy nature of said branch, finding it to be too thin and wobbly to hold her, so she continued to climb until she did. Once she managed to steady herself on a thick branch, she lay down, tail hanging low and waited.

We could hear the wolf approaching, his large paws and powerful scent giving him away before he came into our sight. The beige canine twitched his ears, peeking them as he listened around. His tail twitched back and forth as well, in irritation perhaps?

She tensed her muscles, and crept along the branch as we watched him. Then she leaped, her aim nearly perfect, and landed on his back with her claws sheathed. The wolf jumped, shocked and alarmed as he reared back and sent us both falling.

Our limbs were tangled, my long tail draped around his face and snout and his paws smushing my muzzle. I bet we look like an alpha pair, alright.

His paws shoved against my muzzle more as he wiggles against my frame and stumbles to his feet, shaking undergrowth from his fur and baring his teeth at me as if to scold me.

My cat simply flicked her tail.

• • •

"Hey Princeton?"

His eyes moved up to me and he blinked, popping a grape into his mouth. "Yes, Kitty?"

I grimaced at the nickname, throwing an orange slice at his face and watching as he moved and caught it in his mouth and flashing a smirk at me.

"You said a month or so ago that the Council summoned me," I reminded him, plucking a grape from its stem and popping it into my mouth. "Why haven't we gone?"

Princeton's eyes darted away from mine, instantly telling me something wasn't right.

"Princeton?" My arms slid up as I straightened myself, concerned with his sudden change in demeanor. "Princeton, what is it you're not telling me?"

He sighed, slumping his front half against the counter as he turned slightly on the stool to face me. "The Council had checked both of our records to make sure everything was in order and to read up on our files. Because we found each other as soulmates, we are obligated to travel to the Council Lands and put in the records that we are, in fact, mates. Because it's law, we usually send in a request for a file update and they'll fly the files out to us so nobody has to make the travel." He reached over, taking my hand as if he felt I needed comfort.

I already knew this. I've done it many times for school, health updates, and when I chose Andy as my mate. I hadn't had it in my mind to request a file update since I've been banished. I have a lot to change in my file.

"I'm guessing they pulled ours out and noticed my mate was still listed as Andy?" I figured, smiling a little and he nodded. "I also suppose I need to fix my location and Clan to Pack."

"Yes." His eyes met mine a bit affectionately. "However, because you went so long without requesting your files to be sent to you for changing, the Council would like to sit down with us both. They want to confirm with you, myself, and my parents as former leaders, that you are here of your own free will and that Andy is no longer who you wish to have down as your mate. They would also like proof that you've lost his mark." His eyes drifted to my bare neck. "None of those will be a problem."

"Okay." I shrugged, fidgeting slightly on the stool. My neck tingled around the spot Princeton was eyeing, and I continued, "Then what's the problem? I won't have an issue with changing any of that as long as they don't fuck with the records and dig too deep."

He sighed, squeezing my hand. "I'm afraid that's where I got a little worried," he murmured, voice tinted with an edge of worry, "They are also bringing in Andy, and they would like his side and reasoning for the split and your leave from the Clan in which you were born and raised. They want both of you to explain why all of this had occurred so that they may put it in records and archive it. It's not an interrogation, as you know, it's just to keep track of the beings that walk our world. We don't want a war, so getting as much physical evidence for everything always helps."

My heart dropped to my stomach as Princeton voices the nightmare that would soon become an inevitable reality. "I see," I breathed. "Well, if he's still playing victim, then he'll be all too willing to tell them about my miscarriage and how it was my fault."

His eyes flashed, and he clenched his jaw. "Which is why it is very important you tell the truth. All creatures know that in the Cat shifting world, disobeying your leader is next to impossible without the body harming itself. There's no script anywhere in our Archives that denies or claims that a shifter of your type is able to resist obedience without serious physical and mental consequences." He shifted on the stool and leaned closer to me. "The Council is not calling us to put you on trial, mi sol. They only desire to update our records and wish us a congratulations on finding one another. I will never allow that awful shifter to ever hurt you again."

I was hesitant, but when he reached forward and cupped my face gently, he murmured a promise against my lips like a prayer, "You are my everything. I will readily take any damage any creature would dare bring you."

I believed him.

• • •

i'm sorry for taking so long on getting this chapter. i'm a bit peeved at wattpad and i've been a bit busy with college / work :)

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- grace xx