Cut me down
But it's you who'll have further to fall
Ghost town and haunted love
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones
I'm talking loud not saying much

• • •

Why were they on their knees for me? I looked back at Princeton and saw he, too, was on his knees. But something inside of me told me that it wasn't for the same reason the others were — and not just because his family still stood on their feet behind us.

He looked up at me, his golden-brown gaze meeting my own. So many things passed through those eyes, from affection, to awe, to respect, to joy. He stood first, followed by the rest of his pack as he walked toward me.

"Welcome, Rivera Kingston, to the Blackwood Pack. Just as you have sworn your life to us, we return the same promise to you. As a member of our society, sister in arms, and family." Princeton met my gaze and locked it as he slid his hands over mine, not appearing to be bothered in the slightest as he took the blood soaked daggers from my hands. He turned and lay them across a towel that a young girl held, who then proceeded to disappear with them as quickly as she appeared.

He grabbed a towel from the table at the side and wrapped my arms in it, wiping the blood from the already healing cuts. "You did do well," he said quietly, his eyes resting firmly on me with affection and pride. "I'm so . . . So proud of you," he murmured, leaning forward to brush his lips against my forehead.

A content rumble escaped my throat quietly, just enough for only him to hear. I felt his lips twitch against my forehead before he pulled back and peered at me. His hand brushed tenderly against my cheek and I leaned against it, finding immense comfort in the touch to soothe my rattled nerves.

"You feel like mingling?" he asked after a second, pulling his hand back and instead twining his fingers with mine, stepping closer. I looked down at our intwined hands and back at the crowd.

I suddenly felt like a very small kitten among wolves. My grip tightened intentionally on Princeton's hand and I said, "Um . . . Maybe you could introduce me to your friends?"

Smart, Rivera. I praised myself. Meeting Princeton's friends might ease me into becoming friends with them myself, giving me a bit more of a social life here outside of Princeton's family. They were good company, but I wanted to be more involved in the life of my mate's pack in order to give him a chance to my fullest capabilities.

Princeton smiles at me, a twinkle in those eyes that always make my heart skip a few beats at a time. "Really?" he asked, surprised but pleased. "Are you sure?"

"Of course," I assured him, giving his hand another squeeze. "Baby steps with talking to all these people. Let's start easy. Your friends."

"Baby steps." My mate nodded with understanding as his gaze scanned the crowd of mingling pack members. "I'll mind-link them to a certain area so we don't have to look."

I nodded as he began to lead me across the stage, his presence providing me a comfort that pushed away half the anxiety and insecurities before they had a chance to fester. His thumb was lightly grazing soft webbed area of skin between my forefinger and thumb, sending small but powerful tingles against my nerves.

He helped me down the stairs in the most polite way, his eyes not leaving mine until we joined side by side again, this time his arm wrapping around my waist and his hand resting on my hip.

"Anything I should know about your friends before I meet them?" I questioned in a low voice, knowing he heard it clearly.

Princeton's emotions turned from content to amusement, the two feelings sending warm shivers down my spine. "Do not take advice from Parker. He is, and always will be, a man of many words. About ninety-nine percent of what he says is absolutely stupid," he tells me with a chuckle. "He is the only one I should warn you of. The rest of them are eager to meet you and promise to behave."

"Let them be themselves if they desire it," I reply, smiling a little. "I don't want them to think they have to be polite and formal to me."

"I know." He traced designs on my hip with his fingers, smiling at anyone who greeted us as we passed but making it clear we were not stopping to chat. "When I told them to behave, I meant to not overwhelm you. I know you want people to be who they are around you. It's how you work out their habits and personalities."

I smiled a bit at him, relieved, and we steered our path a bit to the right toward a group of wolves about our age. There were seven from what I counted, four of them males, three female. "Ayyeee Princeton!" A blonde-haired male yelled despite the fact we were right in front of them now. They all turned their gazes to us and smiled, voicing their own greetings.

"We should introduce ourselves so Rivera can get a better idea of us," stated a short female with dyed aqua hair in a loose bun and a pair of big glasses on her nose. She was wearing a pretty silk dress to match her hair with a bow around the waist and black flats. "I'm Georgie. Gia for short."

Before I could say hello, the next person standing beside her lifted his hand in a wave, a smile forming on his defined jawline. He was handsome, with dark skin and dark eyes. "We've heard a lot about you from Princeton. He never really shuts up. I'm Zach, one of two of the Raegan twins."

I raised an eyebrow as a female stepped forward. She had his face, definitely, and her dark brown hair was beautifully done in braided beads and pulled back in a ponytail. "I'm Imani. The cuter, smarter twin," she introduced cheekily.

I held back a laugh as Zach sent an offended frown to his sister, while another female with green eyes and strawberry blonde hair made her introduction, "I'm Azalea. It's nice to meet you officially, Rivera." Her voice was as gentle as a bubbling creek, and her face was rounded and soft.

"She's the mom of our group," the guy next to her said, nudging Azalea gently. "I'm Rico." A male of few words, but hailed a bright smile and sparkling golden eyes.

I nodded and moved my gaze to the next person, a shorter male, skinny with blue eyes and messy black hair. "I'm Frankie," he said sweetly and I smiled at him.

Which meant that the blonde-haired, hollering male was — "I'm Parker, my good Luna," Parker purred, voice dripping like fresh honey. "Truly, it is a pleasure."

Princeton's growl was drowned out by the guys laughing and Zach clapping Parker on the back. "You won't be saying that if Prince decides he wants to pull your insides out of your ass."

The analogy made even me wince at the phantom pain. "That wouldn't be pretty," I mused out loud.

I was pulled closer to Princeton by the gentle grasp he had on my waist, bending down to place a soft kiss to the top of my head. "Aww," Gia cooed, clapping her hands together. "Guys you cant deny how sweet that is."

I tried to not blush at the words and smiled at them. "It's nice to meet you guys." Then, with growing confidence, I said, "I didn't realize Princeton had friends. He appears to be broody and sad when he's not obtaining my full attention."

The rumbling in Princeton's chest didn't stop the laughter from the group in front of us, nor did the look my mate give me. "Watch your tongue, Kitty, or I'll do something else with it."

I grinned at him cheekily, a response already formed. "You know, you say that a lot, but you never go through with it. I think it's because you get too caught up in chasing your own tail. Everything else just — " I snapped my fingers and clicked my tongue, "— falls away, never to be thought of again."

Imani broke out in laughter from my left, and Princeton raised his eyebrows at my words. His eyes locked with mine, a playful sparkle in them as he drew me closer, hands on my hips. "Perhaps it's because you're that one little annoying itch I can't seem to get out of it. You just love passing your fleas to me, don't you? Not to mention you stare out the window all day. What is a wolf to do when his cat doesn't play?"

"At least we don't sniff each other's asses," I cooed gently, my thumbs sliding up the sleeves of his dress-suit and running circles on his skin. The contact, despite our playful and relaxed demeanor, kept Feline at bay. We hadn't yet experienced the entirety of the pack in one gathering, so this was new and the smells were almost overwhelming. We grew up associating wolves with a type of danger signal, so pushing that instinct away was trying. Physical contact eased her discomfort. And mine.

"Maybe, but that doesn't take away the facts of it all: we don't shit in a sandbox." His gaze kept on mine, and the gentle question behind the dancing gold in his eyes were not lost. For the first time, I heard his voice ease into my head, Are you okay?

We are not used to the amount of werewolves in one setting. Adjustment is harder than Feline thought it would be. But we are okay. I responded, and I felt the ghost of fingers brush the back of my neck. I shivered, knowing it was the bond — but hardly believing it was true. From what I learned at a young age, mated pairs in the wolf world had a connection so deep and uncanny that, supposedly, one half could almost phantom touch their partner even from miles away. Princeton just proved it true.

"No response, Kitty?" my mate purred, a smirk rising to his lips. "Have I well and truly caused a curl in your tongue?"

I brought myself back to the present, where Princeton and his friends stood around me joking and laughing as if I were never an outsider at all. "I just don't feel the desire to dignify your weak insults with a response," I sniffed, shrugging him off. "It's not worth my breath."

"Oof," Zach said, nudging Princeton.

Other pack members around us had lingered in and out of earshot, offering amused and friendly glances. Some brushed their skin against mine, not unusual in the feline world either. It was a greeting and assurance of sorts, a way for shifters to associate one another with safety and numbers.

Princeton cupped my face suddenly and pulled me into a kiss, to which I was shocked. Certainly not unwelcome in the slightest, merely a surprise. I kissed him back, leaning into him. I heard a loud whoop from beside us, but I ignored it as Princeton kissed me.

His lips were my downfall, his warmth my greatest weakness, his heart the key to the secrets to my buried past, his soul the force that would heal the once-believed permanent trauma on my entire being.

I realized in that moment when he suddenly, unexpectedly, kissed me that he would become everything. My heartbreak, my healing, my rise and my fall, the reason to live and the risk I would die for. The controller to the game of emotions my mind and body played daily, and the consumer of what I could provide.

Simply, this man has already become my world, a world I thought only Andy would be able to take from me. But Princeton was attempting to give me more than just the world, he was trying to be more than my world.

He was going to be my universe.

• • •

I learned a lot about Princeton's friends as the night grew deeper. He grew up with them. Most wolf children in packs do, just like Felines, and they all went to school together. They were inseparable, they did everything together, and it was then I realized how important they were.

Imani was his beta. It was a choice, though I really had no place commenting on, I approved of. Imani was outspoken from the time we talked, and she was nothing but friendly and curious when she spoke with me. She avoided questioning my history, where I came from and how and why I ended up running with wolves. Instead, she asked questions that were important for them and now.

"What's your favorite song? What human shows or movies do you enjoy the most? Books you like?" Simple, comfortable questions I don't mind going into with people about. Questions that I don't have to cause myself tension and grief over when answering.

Rico, unsurprisingly, was Princeton's third. A calm, observing wolf, he didn't mind listening to us talk. He was content with responding and speaking when our conversations directed toward him, proving that despite his drawn off look, his distant appearance, he listened and watched without fail. I see why Princeton chose him as his third as he chose Imani as his beta.

Rankings in a Feline society wasn't as to the book as a wolf's society. The Denari had a second, but like the wolf the second was to be leader only if the previous had no heir to take their place or the heir is too young. Another thing, unlike wolves, females had no ability to be a Denari. Our place, plainly put, could be anything in rank excluding Denari, Denari's Companion, or Third Line. All titles were male titles only. Anything else was free game. Our lead warrior, the trainer of our young for battle in my pride, was a female. She would be recognized and respected for her values, courage, strength, and loyalty. But she would never be Denari. 

We also did not have such limits as to what could pass as second or third. If a Denari saw potential in a young feline, a placeholder would be put in as Denari's Companion until the chosen was at least sixteen. Until then, they'd be trained vigorously for the rank. Honor and respect among all.

I liked the structure of the wolves. Their ranks were chosen out of spirit, kin, personality, training. Princeton chooses his closest ranks because he knows them, he knows they would die for him out of their love and loyalty for him. His trust in them is something that keeps the society standing.

The trust is what makes a pack, what makes this pack a family.

I could stand behind that any day, because I was coming to realize how quickly they were becoming the family I wanted.

Eventually, however, like most felines get, exhaustion took me over. Social interactions weren't a hardship for felines, but we are not shifters that like to mingle for extended periods. Though we live in large social groups, we have smaller family units that we are most comfortable being around constantly. When I felt the strain in my spine and the coil in my stomach whenever a wolf brushed against me in a greeting, I decided my limits were reached.

Princeton noticed, and he was kind enough to allow me to leave without explaining myself too terribly. He promised to join me after wrapping some things up, so I climbed the stairs to my bedroom on my own.

As I was changing in the bathroom, making sure to handle the dress with such care, I heard Princeton outside the door. "I'm so proud of you, Rivera."

I smiled to myself as I pulled my hair into a ponytail, wanting to keep it from my face when I washed my makeup and leaned over to push open the door. I smiled at him, and he smiled back from the bed, wearing a t-shirt and sweats. I started removing my makeup with a removal wipe. "It was good for me. For us."

He nodded in agreement, running his fingers through his hair and watching me with those damned eyes. "It was good for the pack, too," he added, his voice having a relieved tilt. "Your acceptance of them, of the membership, to them provides them with the comfort they need. They're more comfortable now that they saw you, got an idea of you. More comfortable with the idea of you being their second leader. Their Luna."

I was listening carefully to his explanation, and I swallowed uneasily. When I was done, I threw the wipes out. "I'm no Luna. I'm no leader. Their trust in me scares me a lot," I admitted as I walked out of the bathroom.

Princeton's eyes watched me in an almost predatory way, waiting for the perfect moment he would pounce. When I got close enough to the large bed, he was sitting up and sliding his hands to my hips, staring up at me. "You are already a Luna they crave. You proved yourself tonight, not that you needed to of course, by agreeing to become apart of the pack. By taking our oath and bearing our marks. You are Luna. You are a leader."

His thumb was creating gentle, warm circles on the skin, right underneath the tank top I had slipped on. We watched one another, and I allowed his words to drift around for a few seconds before saying, "I don't know how to be a leader they need, Princeton. I couldn't be what my Clan needed, so they threw me to the wolves." Andy threw me to the wolves. They had no choice but to watch.

His left hand reached up and slowly drew a strand of hair behind my ear, the touch so tender I was afraid of it. "But you returned leading the pack," he whispered as he drew me down into a kiss.

• • •

i honestly have no excuse for my lack of updates other than that i got a large amount of writer's block. i'm sorry. I'll try to do better.