2023 Author's note (proofreading): I censored almost the entire part which described the rape because upon rereading, I found it too horrible and I even doubted being the author of this text. I think it doesn't need a description to understand.

_________

     The night went on like this and Jungkook eventually fell asleep. When his sleeping body threatened to fall, Jin thoughtlessly stood up, positioned a pillow on the carpet and slid Jungkook down to lie down properly. He watched his face for a few minutes to make sure he was asleep. Then he strode over to the closet, grabbing a blanket and spreading it over the sleeping young man.

     His whole body ached, his whole body hurt terribly, he felt like he had been steamrollered but he knew that was not what had happened. His manager had raped him and to compel him, he had make him suffer. He wept as he remembered what had happened.

     He shouldn't have but he felt particularly dirty and disgusting. He had let himself be raped by his manager. He had to wash himself quickely, before Jungkook woke up. He had to erase the traces of what the man had done to him. He turned off the lamp of the bedroom, walked to the Jungkook's bathroom, closed the door and ran the water in the tub.

     Facing the mirror, he observed his bruised body. His gaze went down beyond his collarbones and discover, under the bite marks, bruises in various places of his body: his arms, his sides, his thighs ... dried blood mixed with seed that wasn't his was there as it were stuck and the vision with all his body disgusted him like it had never happened to him. He no longer saw anything beautiful in him. He had been marked by Lee, head to toe, like his own, like his thing. How was he going to hide this from everyone in the days to come? He wanted to hide forever out of their sight.

     He didn't dare look too much at the side of the area that hurt him the most. His lower back ached terribly and when he lay down in the hard bottom of the tub his whole body contracted in pain. 

     Jungkook was not there to see it. No one was there. So, he cried again without being able to stop because alone he had the right to be weak.

     Once washed, he put on the black and sufficiently covering black clothes borrowed from Jungkook, then began to remove and change the sheets on the bed. He would have liked to wash the soiled sheets and blankets but seeing the blood stains that would probably not come off, he preferred to put them in a plastic bag and threw it in the trash.

      Then he remained standing, staring at that bed he never wanted to lie on again and then Jungkook, still asleep on the floor. He wanted to make him comfortable on the bed, but he didn't dare. This bed had become in his eyes the bed of his shame, of his downfall. Would Jungkook himself want to sleep on it again?

     He sat down next to the maknae and in turn buried his head in his knees, waiting for the night to pass. He didn't want to close his eyes for fear of falling asleep and reliving, through his nightmares, the assault he had suffered that night.

     When the sun's rays finally filtered through the blackout curtains on the window, he stood up and walked towards the kitchen. He didn't care what time it was, he just wanted to leave this room and do something that would distract his mind.

     He began to cook and went through multi-course preparations which he placed in plastic and glass boxes before putting them in the freezer for their future meals, on the days when they came home exhausted. It was far too early for anyone to join him in the kitchen, and he spent several hours there alone. He only stopped cooking when he ran out of space in the freezer and put everything else in the fridge or on the breakfast table for his dongsaeng later.

     When he finished cleaning everything and found himself completely idle, he sat down and rested his head on the table, again letting himself be filled with an overwhelming urge to cry again.

     Everything is going to be fine.

     No, nothing is right.

    Yes, everything is going to be fine.

     No, nothing is right.

     His positive thoughts seemed to duel against his negative thoughts, and one side won out. He had been threatened to ruin his life either by ruining his reputation and that of his group or ruining his body and mind and there was no way to get over that. Why still live if he had to face such a bleak future? why did he have to go through all this? What had he done to deserve this? He no longer sees possible happiness. He was completely broken.

     His once so vivid, powerful positive thoughts were now swallowed whole by the negative thoughts and he was seized with a sudden panic attack as he began to breathe harder and harder. Instead of fighting it, he let his body envelop itself, suddenly wishing that his body would allow him to rest forever so that his mind would stop tormenting him.

     However, as his heart pounded painfully in his chest, his breathing hardened and he stood up only to collapse heavily to the ground, unable to stand, a panic fear suddenly gripped him, even more firmly: he didn't want to die...

    2023 A/N : It's from here that I censored almost everything.

    Jin's body kept shaking. He heard the footsteps approaching him, slowly, as if his owner wanted to enjoy what he saw. He looked particularly fragile and totally submissive,  his eyes were closed, so tightly closed it almost hurt. But he didn't want to reopen them, hoping nothing would happen if he stayed that way. 

     He heard an evil laugh echoing in the room and his chills redoubled. He abruptly opened his eyes and found himself face to face with Lee.

     "N-No..." he moaned in fear.

     Jin realized he was back in Jungkook's room, lying on the bed of the shame, naked. Jungkook was no longer next to the bed; he was no longer even in the room, the door was closed, probably locked. 

     "I-I don't wanna do this, I changed my mind, please, let me go," he pleaded, tears in the eyes, seeing his manager dangerously approach him.

     "It's too late to cry, you should have thought before about what you and Jungkook were doing. Now, our secret pact is sealed, or at least it will be tonight," Lee sneered.

     "N-no, please, there must be another way, I will do anything to-"

     He was interrupted by Lee's large hand which slammed violently against his mouth. The back of his head hit the headboard hard and he felt himself losing consciousness. 

      "Mmmmph..." he moaned because of the pain.

     Jin would have liked to lose consciousness at that moment but unfortunately, he lay awake and distinctly heard Lee's voice:

     "You are tiring me out and you're killing the mood so here's what we're gonna do : from now on, every time I hear the slightest sound out of your mouth, you will be punished, is that clear?"

     Unable to speak due to the hand gagging him and scared to suffer even more, Jin only nodded, letting his tears fall from his eyes and wet Lee's hand. Then, Lee freed his mouth but he did not let go of him and squeezed his cheeks harshly : 

     "Good. I decide how things go, you just shut up. And if I decided to deflower you tonight, that's what I'll do: I'm going to pop your cherry and make you a man, just like I promised."

      Then, Jin's suffering really began...

     "I don't want to die..." Jin gasped, half-conscious, his body brutally shaken.

     "You're not going to die, hyung, but you have to breathe!!"