YamiNoKami: Okay hey guys and girls!! Thank you for reading my books. First time doing fanfic was a rough start since I was 14 at the time and god dam they were cringe levels. Oh*eyes twitching* you want that? OKAY FINE BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT I LOSE MOTIVATION ON FANFICS!! WELL HERE'S THIS NON CANON CRAP!! Well we have our guests here along with my special guests Ginhakari54  and ZomboMusic !!

Y/n: uhhh why are we here?

Yami: okay Kirito it's a talk show!!

Y/n: I'm Y/n!!

Yami: I'm used to saying your name Kirito so suck it up!!

Suguha: those are not people, they're...

Yami: WATCH IT!!

Gin: hey it's been a while!!

Yami: yep!!

Zombo: okay what's the question?

Yami: okay Kirito you were in the SAO incident correct?

Kirito: yes that is correct?

Yami: you were also named the beater because of the beat testing?

Kirito: yes that is also true.

Yami: after this fanfic you want to bone your cousin, Asuna, Sachi, Medina, Alice, Silica, Lisbeth, Tiese, Ronie, Sortiliena, Sheyta, Yuna, Yuuki, Sinon and Eugeo?

Kirito: yeah-wait what!?

Suguha: Nii-Chan is that true!?

She covers her face as she blushes red along with the others.

Yami: see? Anime is a masterpiece of art of harem!!

Zombo: yeah sure...

Gin: funny.

Yami: let me remind you that you banged the blonde teacher from Beacon in RWBY!! While you Gin banged team RWBY, Pyrrha, Cinder, Penny, Velvet, Coco, Neo, Naruko, Kushina, Hinata, Kyuubi, Satsuki, Itachia and Ahri!!

Rafael: why do I have suffer?!

Kali, Willow, Summer and Raven: SENPAI!!

Rafael: WHY!?

Gin: what about you? You banged the Honkai Impact girls along with The Genshin Impact girls along with a Adult sexy Paimon even Kirito's female counterpart even even Claire, Cythina, Daithina, Sabrina and with female Gijinkas legendary and semi legendary pokemon!!

Yami: anyways!! So Eugeo how do you feel about Kirito?

Eugeo: well ummm he's very kind, shy and a brave person with determination.

Yami: anything else? Like his eyes? His voice? Making you feel warmer? Same with the girls?

Suguha:*blush*

Sheyta:*looks away*

Sinon:*swirly eyes*

Eugeo: he's....

Yami: good looking, hot, sexy, cute making you and the girls turned on?

Kirito: no please!!

Yami: if you want you can have sex with him in the new private room with interesting items for your "moment".

Kirito: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Yami: GETTING YOU LAID YOU DENSE MOTHERFUCKER!!

Asuna:*drags him*

Kirito: NO I WANT TO LIVE!! I'M NOT READY TO BE A BISEXUAL FATHER!!!

Eugeo: COME ON KIRITO-SENPAI LET'S MAKE BABIES!!

Sinon: LIKE IT OR NOT YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH US!!

Kirito: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Gin, Rafael and Zombo:*laughs*

Yami: OH NO YOU THREE ARE GOING TO HAVE SAME FATE WHILE MYSELF GETS TO BE THE ALPHA TO ***** MY GIRLS!!!

(Timeskip)

Yami: so how was it?

Rafael: I...fucking...hate...you

Gin: I...need...ice.

Zombo: I...can't....feel...my...dick.

Yami: how about you Kirito?

Kirito:*blush*

Yami: Well there you go readers!! ARE YOU HAPPY!?

(Sorry to interrupt but YamiNoKami has going into a phase of Kirito/Reader x SAO harem with crossovers please run...)