Shakayla's POV

   I've gotten more comfortable with the lesbian porn, and ever since I've started watching on my own, I haven't been having the visions.

Now, I know what everyone's thinking, but just because I like watching lesbian porn doesn't mean that I like women.  I just like......what they do.  I like the sensuality of it all.  I like the passion.  Whenever I watch straight porn, it's like there's none of that, and I always think about what Mahalia said about it.  About how the women aren't actually having real orgasms.  About how it's all for show and they're just trying to over sale it.

No one knows that I watch it on my own.  Not Keith, not Raeya, not Mahalia.  I'm definitely not telling them.  Keith would have a heart attack if I told him, and Mahalia and Raeya would just tell me that I like women even though I don't.

They're my friends, but seriously, they're pissing me off.  They're always trying to tell me who I am.  What gives them the fucking right?  Why do they act like they know me better than I know myself?  Who are they to tell me my sexuality?  I don't tell them theirs.  I don't go up to them and say, "Hey, you're not actually gay.  You're straight."  It's not fair.  What gives?

And Keith's mom was way out of line.  She had just met me, and she was already jumping on the 'Shakayla likes women' train.  Like, ma'am, you don't know ANYTHING about me.  And how can you just sense that about someone?  Is she insinuating that she has some kind of psychic abilities or something?

It's like Keith is the only one listening to me.  He knows I don't like women, and he doesn't push me about it.  That's one of the reasons I love him.

Keith has been my world since we were seniors.  Contrary to popular belief, I actually approached him first.  I saw him in the hallway, and I knew from the moment I laid eyes on him, I wanted him.

He was wearing a varsity jacket, he was on the football team.  I feel like for some reason, wearing a sports team jacket in high school gives you some form of validation.  Like, you have a guaranteed pass that you're popular and no one will mess with you.

I wasn't a cheerleader like how all the typical love stories go.  In fact, I didn't even play a sport.  I wasn't even on any academic teams.  I was just your average Joe, and he still fell for me.

We didn't have any classes together unfortunately, but we always managed to hang out with each other outside of school.

I would always go to his games and be his biggest cheerleader.  Sometimes, we'd cut class and he'd sneak away with me to make out behind the bleachers.  Good times.

We'd go on lunch dates.  He'd always buy my favorite meal and favorite drink.  I've paid for his stuff, too.  We actually alternate.

I just wish he could satisfy me sexually.  He checks all the boxes for me except that one.  I can't bear to tell him.  It would break him.  I've been holding back for so long.  I'm in too deep now.  He can never know.