"how selfish I am" the young man who once was me said

"How so?" The lover answered lifting his head

I smiled

I wouldn't tell him why I was selfish 

But I knew all too well

I loved him so deeply

I loved him so passionately

I loved him like no other

And see there's where I went wrong

I desired the love I gave him

Reciprocated like an exact copy

I wanted him to love me

Deeply

Passionately

If I knew you loved me like I love you 

I would feel at ease

I would know

But I have this problem 

This terrible mistake in my brain

Wrecking my heart and tearing us apart

I want to lose this uncertainty

I want to know how I love you

How you love me

I want to know you are walking behind me 

You are my Eurydice and I am Orpheus

If I look I will lose you

But if I don't look I might've already lost you

I want to know that wherever I go you will follow

As I will follow you

I want to know that in the dark you see me

As I see you

I want to know you trust me

But do I trust you?

And we both know it is my fatal flaw

And we both ignore it

It is easier to be perfect

Even with a fatal flaw

I would love you

Do you love me?

I know you love me

And still I remain selfish