Ouma's POV:

I got cheated. 

What? Expecting some kind of monologue how everything went wrong, how I fell because of my hubris, or because of how much I 'loved' everybody that I was willing to die for them. Or maybe you're a fan of the stories of how I was depressed, suicidal and wanted to die the entire game, that my guilt and my regret made me die, that in the end, I got the punishment I thought I deserved, how I was innocent all along and if only everyone had seen that, if only they reached out, or if I had reached out, how I was in the right all along.

That's the monologue, the story you want to hear, the truth, the unhindered truth of my inner thoughts and what I am. That's what everyone wants to know.

Well too bad. Because I don't feel like being a narrator today.

Don't look for any deeper meaning, don't skim through my thoughts like they're just some words on a piece of paper, I am not a character, I am a human being. So learn to be disappointed now and forever hold your peace.

Just know this.

I was cheated.

~-~-~-~

"DoN't WOrrY KOkichI, eveRYthIng WiLl bE fINe I ProMIse"

Maiko sighed as she sat next to me, "ok, well what did we say to do when you saw someone from the game for the first time?" she asked, "don't scream at them, don't harass them, and don't ask if they have dicks" I answered bored as I played with a Rubix cube in my hand.

"And what did you do?" she asked, "screamed bloody murder at Saihara before the goons knocked me out" I answered, "yes, so what did we learn here?" Maiko asked, "I wish I said more" I answered, "exactly- wait what?" she asked.

I just grinned at this small victory as I ignored my shaking palms. Stop shaking, you're a supreme leader so act like it.

Y-You're n-not a sup-supreme leader though.

I ignored them. 

For the past week, the hospital has been just like the killing game, trapping me inside and forcing me to recover from what the game did to me. Hah, like that is as easy as they explain in the highlighted ten-step plan to recovery, then get evicted from this place and live a happy life that I won't even have to work to sustain for my whole life. Easier said than done, I lost. I...I lost the killing game.

Nothing changes that fact.

Still, today was the worst day of my life. No- that actually would probably be my death day. That day was awful, or maybe the day I woke up after the game? Or the day that- nope won't think about that one. It won the bad day game. But today made it high on the list of bad days because I finally saw Saihara for the first time after the game.

I thought maybe I would just get a little mad when I saw his face, he ruined the plan. I know he ruined the plan because otherwise Kiibo and Shirogane shouldn't have died afterward, Momota was more expected, his illness, and he played his part perfectly so I shouldn't blame him. I can't blame you.

You made the plan fail though, you could've done things so you never would've had to make that plan.

Momota did everything he could until Saihara ruined everything for us. He played the act, even tricked Monokuma, and no matter how many times I replay that episode can I find a point that maybe we would've been caught...if it wasn't for one person. He ruined my victory. I could've won Saihara...I was going to win the game...and look at what you did instead...I died for nothing...Gokuhara died for nothing because of you...I hope you're happy.

"Ouma, you can't just yell at Saihara because of what happened in the game, you do realize he was awake for all of three minutes when you screamed at him? Remember how terrified you were when you woke up? That's how Saihara was probably feeling and you immediately screamed at him within moments of regaining consciousness, that's not good" Maiko scolded, I continued to play with the Rubik's cube. Maiko just sighed.

"What even happened actually outside the room? Mind telling me?" she asked.

P-please, p-please l-let me l-live...

Shut up.

I w-was the f-first one, please, you're not e-even the r-real one I-I am.

I am real! You gave yourself up! SO sit down and let me control this!

I j-just want to see my friends again!

I...I...

I shrugged, "nothing" I answered. Maiko looked at me disapprovingly.

Y-You were too h-harsh on him.

Did I ask for your opinion?

Maiko sat down and crossed her legs, "how are your memories? The nurses are telling me you won't take the medication" she scolded. I shrugged, "I don't know what you're talking about" I answered innocently. She groaned.

"Ouma, I don't know if you understand your condition, you weren't supposed to remember your life before the game this soon, your heart nearly gave out when you woke up because of the shock and the panic-" she started explaining, "don't you think I know that?" I asked.

Maiko looked at me shocked, "don't you understand what you assholes did to my head?" I repeated, "my mind is tearing itself apart, I can remember so many things and everything is screaming inside of it...I can't even focus anymore...heh....are you happy?" I asked laughing dryly.

Maiko didn't answer, "I can hear him...the other one...he wants his body back...and then there's me...I want to exist to..." I told her, "so that little kid is going to have to learn to stand down," I told her.

Maiko looked at me angrily, "Ouma this isn't healthy, please if you're not going to take the suppressants, then at least start taking your therapy sessions more seriously, it's in your best interest if your pregame and game personalities are clashing it could have major effects on your body and psyche-" she started as I glared at her.

"So you mean my body can be worse than it is right now?" I asked. 

She paused unsure of how to answer. I didn't need her to, I couldn't feel my body past my waist. Nothing, the only time I felt something anywhere on my body, it would be some type of pain. Joy. Just playing with the Rubix cube was the most my body and mind could seem to function without being flooded by migraines or being rushed back inside of the killing game.

Maiko looked at me sadly, "I want to help you Ouma" she told me, "I want to stop you from destroying yourself" she assured, "so please listen to me, I know what I'm talking about, I've seen this happen to people like you before...and it never ended well...so please let me save you" she pleaded.

I didn't answer. She didn't expect me to though I guess.

Y-You lost...

Shut up.

~-~-~-~

The day had started normally. I was being rolled down the hall for a daily 'walk'. Nothing different, we never went outside and the facility had no windows to be seen, making the only great views being the white walls of the hallways and the squeaky floors. If you were lucky you could see the rare view of a little custodian sign.

I should have recognized the signs sooner.

The hallway at first seemed normal, it was normal. Then the walls began to close in on each other, warping inverting itself as it opened up back to the ink blackness, it was a vast sea that erased the entire hallway, I felt my eyes widened as I looked around terrified, "help...HELP!" I screamed but no one responded, then a light came, I reached desperately...

And felt the cold metal against my back. An overwhelming pain invaded my body. I recognized this pain, I would remember this pain till the day I die, that made my body feel like it was breaking apart and everything was being crashed down.

It was the hydraulic press. I'm back in the game, no no no, please not again! I don't want to die! I don't want to die! I'm NOT READY TO DIE PLEASE GOD! My body lurched forward as I felt my upper body writhing in agony as I couldn't help but scream at this pain as my body tried to keep itself under control, someone...please...please...make it go away....make it go away.....

I saw his face. I saw his face, his eyes full of anger and malice, how he looked at me with his self entitled face, as if he was better than me, that was something he really really believed...I looked around everywhere, not again not again not again anything but that please God please I don't want this I don't want this!

I looked up past the heavy tears building in my eyes to meet with a pair of amber eyes. That navy hair was longer than before, and he seemed skinnier. But that was undeniably him, raged went past any sense of judgment aided with the pain still wreaking havoc as I cried out "YOU!" Saihara's face looked shocked as I stared daggers at him, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"I screamed as a sharp pain entered my neck and an overwhelming sense of tiredness as I fell back into the black abyss.