alloz

im not really in the mood to do a journal update so i'll just say some shit here i guess?

tomorrow we have a softball tournament the school team

if you're wondering what softball is it's basically baseball with metal bats and heavier balls to catch and hit

now it just sounds like a torture method

annyyyywaays

im feeling a bit off like tomorrow im not going to be able to produce the performance the coach and the guys need me to deliver

i don't know why i've been feeling a bit doubtful of my prowess and my skills like what if i have one bad day and that's tomorrow and we lose that tournament because abdullah khan couldn't smash the ball like he does or because abdullah khan dropped a important catch which led to a team collapse

maybe i should trust myself more but i don't know

it's the biggest stage for us in school sports behind regional tournaments and this is where the best of the best turn up and i don't feel like i'm one of them

who knows, maybe i'll feel the opposite tomorrow morning and do well

praying to God i do

as well as that, we have cultural day coming up

im dancing in two songs

one is super fuckboy the other one is really fun

i like both of them so it's fine

i might go to a party next thursday, it'll be my first one in a while

and by a while i mean like a few weeks

(wow abdullah such party animal much chick magnet)

im going with a good friend of mine so it'll be fun for sure

the only problem is its the day before cultural day and i don't wanna be too tired to perform the next day or help out in setting up our stall

but i think i'll go

i'll put some snaps up on snapchat so if yall have me on there you'll see

(casual commercialization)

i think that'll be enough for now

im probably gonna go listen to music and cry a bit because my emotions are god knows where rn

take care, love yall, peace

- abdullah ⚡🔹