i feel really depressed right now, to be honest

and im having a bad headache, and i feel sleepy

basically, i went home by metro today

and a load of people were there too, it was literally jam packed

and these uni students were there, 3 to 4 girls

and the second i got on the metro, they kept saying some shit and looking at me

and then i moved closer to them, because my friend went off from her station, and i was now alone

sadly, they were right next to me, and either they didn't notice, or they just didn't care

but

they thought i was a uni student

and one of them suddenly asked me what major are you doing?

and i just looked confused and said, im in the 11th grade

and then she just went like oh, you look old, maybe it's because you're fat, sorry

then, they started talking about me for some reason

they started making jokes about me and making fun of me, and they didn't even care to be a bit quieter

how im so fat that i probably have another person inside me

how i'm a pig inside a human body

and how im probably a failing student who's supposed to be in uni but is too dumb to pass

i felt so sad because it felt like this is how the entire world sees me

im tall, i have a stocky body structure, and on top of that, i am overweight

i never thought it would make my life like this

it just hurts so much because i had a bad last few classes when my headache kicked in

and i cried when i was in the taxi on the way back after my metro ride

i want to lose weight, i want to do well in school

it just feels like im not doing enough

maybe i am not doing enough