A/N Wow a first person AU 😱 What's wrong with me? 😂 Also I have loads of idea but I don't know who to write about so if you could help that would be great 😁

Trigger Warning: Car Crash

Set in 2019

I was always told 'Never step foot in your car after a breakup, you never know where you will end up'. But of course, I never listen to what people tell me. As soon as he'd kicked me out, I got in my car and drove. My biggest regret: Not saying goodbye to them all.

When I drive I never have a destination. As corney as it sounds, I let my heart take the wheel. I don't have a destination but I have a plan. Three stops, then I go home to my family. Three stops and then I will never have to see him again.

First stop: The place we met.

The bar wasn't very far from his house. It was about a ten minute drive. As soon as I strolled in, the guys behind the bar knew why I was there. This wasn't my first time at the rodeo. They moved the people from my normal seat in the corner. I got passed a drink and sat down.

I stared at the spot where I had fell in love. The small juke box that was in the corner was definitely mocking me. That or the smell of alcohol had got to my brain. I looked down at the drink in my hand. As much as I hated life right now, drinking and driving wasn't on my to do list. I slumped further into the corner as the song that we danced to played. That's another Queen song ruined fo me.

I looked around at all the couple. They were young and in love. Something I wouldn't feel for a long time. Their energy radiates of them. I couldn't say the same for myself.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself

I'm allowed to aren't I? I mean I'm going through a breakup. I've never been with a man this long. Let me cry.

A few hours had past and I'd decided it was time for Trip Two. The Baseball Field.

I hadn't been here many times before. Whenever Jason had a game, I would sometimes tag along. I walked up the small step and sat in our usual spaces. I stared at the pitch before me.

I used to play. My Dad taught we everything I know. We would come down every weekend but since his death, I hadn't played since. It just felt wrong. My mom had tried to get me to play, but I couldn't.

The small space next to me had our names carved into it. We were drunk and started acting like teenagers again. The first thing we did was carve out names in the seat.

Marvin loves his boyfriend Whizzer

I felt around in my pocket until I found my pokey knife. I scratched out my name and wrote...

Marvin love his selfish self.

I wiped the tears from my eyes. I felt like a teenager again. I was a grown man. I shouldn't be doing this. I need to go to my last place. The woods.

I pulled out of the car park and carried on driving down the busy street. Once I made it to the light I played the radio. And that damn song came on. The lights changed and I drove. But I guess one driver didn't realise his lights were on red.

They say that when you're dying, you relive your live in your mind in 7 seconds. I could probably fit my life into 3. Memories of Marvin and I came flooding in my mind. The love. The anger. The hatred. The fun time. As much as I hated him at this moment in time, he was still my everything.

With the last remaining strength I had, I managed to find my phone. I had to call him. I needed to apologise

Whizzer what do you want? Did you leave something?

Marvin I'm sorry

Is that it?

No Marvin I love you.

Whizzer what have you done! I can hear sirens.

Car crash.

Jesus Whizzer! Where are you? Are you okay? I'm on my way.

Marvin you won't make it.

I'm so sorry Whizzer. I love you. I really do. Just hand in there. Promise me.

Okay I promise.

The line went dead.

I felt cold.

I guess I can't keep promises

I knew this was it. All I could do was smile. He still loved me. The radio was still playing Queen. The last voice I would ever hear was Freddie Mercury. Guess this wasn't such a bad way to go after all.

You will remember // When this is blown over // Everything's all by the way // When I grow older // I will be there at your side to remind you // How I still love you // I still love you