It wasn't supposed to end like this. No. We were supposed to die really old men, at home in our sleep. Not because of The Owl. Not because of some stupid Anteiku raid. Any way but this.

I looked around at all the bodies that littered the ground. Among them, Iwa and Shinohara. My heartbeat quickened. Was Shinohara okay? Was I okay? I turned my attention toward The Owl momentarily, just in time too, as it was raising it's kagune in my direction, ready to impale me. I wasn't scared though. Not an ounce of fear jolted through my system at the sight. I'd taken down hundreds of ghouls during my time as a scrapper. How was The Owl so different?

As The Owl began his attack, I closed my eyes and put my arms up to shield my face, bracing myself for the oncoming attack. Maybe dying wouldn't be that bad at this point. I could die with Shinohara laying a few feet away from me. I waited, and when The Owl's attack never came, I opened my eyes to the one sight I couldn't bear to see. The Owl's kagune ran straight through Shinohara, as he used his broken battered body to shield me from harms way.

I reached my hand out to him, mind racing in so many directions, "Shino. . .hara. . .san?"

He coughed up blood, some making it's way on to my face in small spatters. He gave me a warm smile, and weakly reached toward me, barely whispering, "Run," His eyelids fell closed, and he fell forward. Body laying mere inches from me.

My body shook in tremors, like an earthquake had gone off in my bones, and a sharp pain engulfed my chest, as if I had been the one injured by The Owl. Is this what it felt like, to lose someone so incredibly special to you? Is this what Nashiro and Kurona were talking about that day? When Shizuku died, is this what they felt? This horrible gut-wrenching pain? I didn't like this. I didn't like this at all.

I reached out to Shinohara, hoping he would grab my hand, and allow me to help him up, just like he did when he taught me proper hand-to-hand combat that one day years ago. Instead, my hand was left hovering above his blood soaked arm, trembling in the fear that Shinohara might not be okay this time. He might not be coming home tonight. I might be left on the sofa to breathe in what remains of his scent, to be alone. Alone. No. Please no. Not again. I couldn't handle it. I would not turn into Rei Suzuya again. I was Juuzou. Juuzou Suzu- No. Juuzou Shinohara. I was not in a cage ready to slaughter people every night to please a fake Mama who never loved me. I was an Investigator to eliminate ghouls, and I lived right beside my partner- the one who I called Papa- in an apartment in the 20th ward, where we were stationed.

I grit my teeth, and looked up at The Owl, screaming at the top of my lungs, "Shinohara-san!". I grabbed my quinque, which I named Juuzou's Jason, after I was given it with Shinohara by my side, and got up running at The Owl at full speed. I would just kill The Owl and me and Shinohara could go home. Right? Right? Shinohara could go to the doctor and get bandaged up a bit. He's be all better, and I could take care of him. I'd done it before, so what was different now? I could slaughter this stupid ghoul right now, and everything would be back to normal.

Shinohara would be fine. I repeated that, over and over in my head, almost driving myself mad. I raised my quinque, landing several blows on The Owl, yet barely making a scratch on his hard exterior and kagune. Before I could formulate my next attack, I found myself smacked hard across the rooftop we resided on, finally landing in a pile of building beams. I winced in pain, looking down at my leg, to see it twisted out of shape. There's no way I could walk on it, but one look at Shinohara's motionless body, propelled me upward, limping toward another attack on The Owl, only to find myself being smacked around again and again and again.

This fight was looking hopeless. My ankle and lower leg was badly broken, and my body ached, begging me to stop. Blood trickled down my forehead, and down my chin, but I couldn't give up. If I didn't do something, The Owl could touch Shinohara. He could try to eat Shinohara. I shuddered, not even letting that thought visualize in my mind. I tried to stand, but fell back onto my knees. My weak withered body couldn't carry my weight anymore, and I could feel my consciousness slowly slipping away. I crawled over to Shinohara, laying myself over him, shielding him from The Owl. I'd give up my life to protect him. No matter what.

"Juuzou... If you were to die, I would be sad" Shinohara had said that to me days prior. Tears streamed down my cheeks. Why hadn't I told him I felt the same? I wouldn't be able to live without him. My life would be empty. I wouldn't be sad, I would be torn apart.

My consciousness was slipping faster and faster, the edge of my vision blurred with black spots. Hearing footsteps, I turned my head towards them, only to see Special Class Investigator Arima. I sighed in relief, closing my eyes, hoping that he would get my revenge for me. I couldn't stay awake any longer. In my weak state I knew I couldn't protect Shinohara, but I'd be damned if he suffered alone, so without another resisting beat, I let my consciousness slip away. Leaving this in Arima's hands now.

-----

"Happy Birthday Juuzou!" Shinohara smiled at me, walking into our apartment, hands adorning a bright box with orange, yellow, and red squiggles all over it. I cocked my head to the side, confused. I stayed laying, upside down on the couch, just staring at Shinohara. Shinohara made a face of protest and shoved the box in my direction. "Come get your gift silly!"

Today was our day off. It was June 8th, and I had been waiting at the apartment for hours while he was shopping. All he bought was a colorful squiggly box? I was more or less the most confused person in the world right now, so I laid where I was, not moving a muscle.

Shinohara came to sit down in front of me, laying the box at his side. "Juuzou, do you even know what a birthday is? Have you never celebrated?" I shook my head fiercely, inciting a sorrowful astonished look to engulf Shinohara's face. I slid off the couch and onto his lap, pulling the corners of his mouth into a smile.

"Smile Shinohara-san!" I smiled and looked down at the box, and back at him. "So what's a birthday? The day you were born?"

Shinohara looked down at me and smiled a bright warm smile. " Yes, that's right Juuzou. Your birthday is a celebration of the day you were born. You get presents and sweets from the people who care about you. It's a party in celebration of you. So I decided I could celebrate with you today Juuzou. Today, according to your file at the CCG, is your birthday,"

My eyes widened, and I pointed at the bright box next to Shinohara, "So. . . you mean you've been out for hours looking for something to give me?"

Shinohara smiled wide and nodded, handing me the box. It was brightly colored, with hues of oranges and reds, and yellows, which doubled as my favorite colors to draw with. In black writing on the top, it said 'To Juuzou, My Partner, My Closest Friend, My Son. Happy Birthday'. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I hugged him tightly. Nobody had done anything like this for me ever. I was. . . . so happy!

"Open it Juuzou," Shinohara smiled.

I slowly tore the colorful paper off the box, until it was bare. Inside, there was a small box, and a larger one. I decided to open the larger one first, to find a new pair of suspenders. They had a triangular pattern of all shades of reds, making me smile brightly. "Thank you Shinohara-san!" I opened the smaller box, to find crimson red clips for my hair. They looked metallic and expensive. Sure I needed new ones, especially since one of the cheap steel pins had broken in half on our last ghoul mission, but these were top of the line. I didn't deserve this. I would break them. . .

Shinohara saw the look of discontent on my face, and tipped my chin up so I was looking at him. "I know what you're thinking, but stop being silly. You deserve the world Juuzou. C'mon, let's get these in your hair,"

Shinohara gently removed the cheap pins from my hair, and let the hair drape over my face, temporarily blinding me. He bunched the hair up, and pinned in into place, exactly in the XIII shape that I liked. I hugged him tightly and ran to the mirror, putting on my new suspenders and smiling.

"Thank you Shinopapa!" I giggled running back to the couch to get a spot next to Shinohara, as it was almost time for some of our favorite shows.

"Shinopapa? That's a silly little nickname. Can I keep it, Juuzou?" Shinohara looked down at me, a look of adoration on his face. I smiled, snuggling up against him.

"Of course Shinopapa. Thank you so much for the pre-sent-s. They were really really nice. I'll cherish them forever!"

------

I awoke on a stretcher next to Shinohara and Iwa. I instantly sat up, looking around. My leg was bandaged, and bodies littered the streets. I touched my head, feeling only 4 pins in my hair instead of 5. My breathing quickened. Where was my other pin? I promised Shinohara I'd cherish it. I needed it. It was so special to me. What would I-

"Juuzou? Thank goodness you're awake. Here, you dropped this during your battle," I turned around to see Special Investigator Houji. He held out my crimson hair clip, which had since broken in half, just like the cheap ones I had before. I grabbed it out of his hand and looked up at him, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks.

"How's Shinohara? Is he okay?" I whimpered out to him.

Houji avoided eye contact. "He's in critical condition. We're about to have him moved to a hospital. We don't know if he's going to make it Juuzou. . ."

I looked over at Shinohara, and crawled over to his side. I clawed at his arata, tearing off what was left of it, until it was off of him. Houji watched helplessly, as the paramedics made their way towards us. I tucked my broken clip in Shinohara's breast pocket, and kissed his forehead, hugging him, as if it was the last time I'd see him. "Get well Papa. I love you. I know you'll make it," I whispered to him before detaching myself to let the paramedics take him to get help.

I sat in the aftermath of this battle on my streatcher, hugging my legs to my chest, hoping, praying, that Shinohara would be okay. He was my Papa, and I loved him so much, I just wished I had told him, what I should have said earlier.

"You mean so much to me Papa, and I love you so much,"