Is this what dysphoria feels like?? The never-ending urge to claw my skin off because it's just not me???? Is that what dysphoria feels like??

'Cause if so, I've been feeling dysphoric for the past, like, two??? hours, and it sucks so badly. Like, internally I feel one way, but my body doesn't match how I feel. 

I guess I should give you some background and context. 

So around the 25th of January or so, I was thinking about stuff regarding gender and stuff, specifically non-binary genders, and I realized that I identify as demigirl, which means that, most of the time, I identify as female, but, the rest of the time, I identify as more neutral. 

And tonight I'm neutral, and certain parts of my body are causing me so much dysphoria. And I was at a band concert when the dysphoria started, which sucked ass because I couldn't do anything about it.

As soon as I got home, about twenty or so minutes ago, I was able to start binding. I don't have an actual binder, so I just use two of my sports bras, and they work surprisingly well. (Another plus is that it feels like I'm getting a hug) 

So yeah... that's been my night.

Oh! I've also been on the verge of a mental breakdown for the past, like, two days, so that's awesome.