Just know that I'll make you hurt,

(I miss the lies and the pain what you did to me)

When you tell me you'll make it worse

(I'd rather fight all night than watch the TV)

I hate that feelin’ inside

You tell me how hard you'll try

But when we're at our worst

I miss the misery

I miss the bad things,

The way you hate me,

I miss the screaming,

The way that you blame me.

    “How are you Louis?”

    “I still can’t sleep.”

    “Nightmares?”

    “No. I don’t need to be asleep to see it, to feel it all over again.”

    “What do you see?”

    “Most recently, threats.”

    “Of?”

    “It becoming worse.”

"Fucking slut,” Harry growled shoving Louis to the ground as soon as they entered the flat.

Louis held his face as his nose started bleeding after he smacked it on the floor. “What the hell are you talking about.”

“It’s like you want every guy to stare at you.”

Louis sighed. “What the hell did I do this time?”

Harry kicked Louis’ side roughly. “You know damn well what you did!”

“We were at the fucking beach. All I did was tan, swim, and surf what’s wrong about that?!” Louis said finally pushing himself to his feet.

Harry groaned in frustration before gripping Louis’ hair and yanking his head back. “You and those God damn short trunks that show off your thighs and bum first of all. Then you go fucking shirtless strutting around and chit chatting with every other man out there.”

Louis glared up at Harry for a moment before Harry finally let his head go, but not before shoving him forward so his head smacked off the side table. “Fuck!” Louis screamed rubbing his forehead. “First of all asshole, you bought me the damn shorts!” Louis said. “Also I was being friendly. They saw me surfing and we got to talking about surfing, that’s all. Get your head out of your ass and deal with it!”

Harry’s eyes darken before he grabbed Louis’ wrists and yanked him along to the bedroom. He shoved him onto the bed and sat on his chest so he couldn’t move. “You really need to learn to keep your mouth shut,” He said reaching into the drawer beside the bed. He pulled out the rope and a scarf. He shoved the scarf into Louis’ mouth before tying his hands to the headboard. “You don’t get to tell me what to do,” He said placing his hands around Louis’ throat. “You have to listen to me and obey,” He growled pushing down making Louis squirm. Harry brought himself up so he was towering over Louis as he pushing harder and harder. Louis thrashed around on the bed trying to get loose, but it only made Harry press harder. “Don’t fight it Louis. We both know how easily I could end you.”

Louis moved his tongue around before he was able to spit the scarf out of his mouth, desperately trying to get air into his lungs. Harry finally let go as Louis’ eyes began to roll back. Louis coughed and gasped trying to fill his lungs up before he screamed as something hot came in contact with his chest. “Harry,” He whined.

Harry just smiled before bringing the blade back up and holding it to the lighter heating the metal back up before pressing it back down on Louis. Loui screamed and tried to wiggle away, but it only caused the blade to slice his skin. “Keep fighting Louis, I’ll only make it worse.”

“Please,” He begged before screaming as Harry dragged the blade across his chest.

“Shut up!” Harry said slapping Louis across the face.

The punishment lasted for 10 more minutes before Harry finally got up and left leaving Louis tied to the bed, burns and cuts all over his chest and stomach, a crying mess.

    “Why didn’t you get out sooner Louis?” Stine asked.

    “I didn’t want out.”

    “You must have at some point.”

    “Is it really that wrong?” Louis asked glancing over at her.

    “Is what wrong?”

    “Me loving him? Him loving me?”

    Stine sighed removing her glasses and uncrossing her legs before leaning forward, “Do you want me professional or personal opinion?”

    “Both?” Louis said leaning back, actually slightly nervous to hear her response.

    “Professionally I’d have to say yes, it’s wrong. You two were constantly at each others throats and by what you’ve told me it sounds like a very dangerous relationship for both of you.” Louis flinched at her harsh and serious tone. “Personally though, no. You can’t help who you fall for and I understand loving someone you shouldn’t be with. However, I’d still say being apart is for the best.”

    “We only hurt ourselves though.”

    “Are you sure? Hurting yourselves can sometimes hurt other people.”

“What kind of pizza do you guys want?”

“I’m okay with anything, Louis wants a salad though,” Harry answered. They were all gathered over at Niall’s house for a lads night having not been able to hang out in a while. Louis wasn’t in the greatest of moods though because Harry’s basically been calling him fat for the past week.

Liam looked over at Louis who just nodded and kept his head down. “I’ll go call it in then.”

“Want to play some fifa Louis?” Niall asked pulling out two controllers.

“No. I’ve lost interest in the game,” Louis replied quietly. He did actually really want to play. He wanted to laugh with his friends and eat pizza, but Harry threatened to beat him unconscious if he disobeyed and Louis knew his body just couldn’t handle anymore right now.

“Since when?” Zayn laughed. “Come on, we haven’t played in a while. Niall here has been practicing. He’s quite determined to beat you.”

Louis snuck a glance at Harry who was shaking his head and glaring at him in warning. “I really don’t want to,” Louis said looking back down.

“Come on Lou, please!” Niall begged.

“No.”

“Just one round,” Niall whined.

“No.”

“Can you at least pretend to be interested?”

“Goddammit Niall I say no!” Louis shouted standing up so he could tower over the now frightened lad. “Ask me one more fucking time and I swear I’m going to beat the shit out of you.”

Niall had tears forming in his eyes. Louis realized what he said and sank back onto the couch scared. Liam was standing in the doorway shocked, Zayn was glaring at him from his spot next to Niall who was crying, and Harry was just smirking. “What the shit Lou?” Zayn asked.

“Niall I am so sorry. I-fuck, I swear I didn’t mean to. You know I would never hurt you intentionally.”

Niall just nodded, but curled further into Zayn’s side. “I u-understand.”

“I’m sorry,” Louis mumbled trying not to cry himself. “I’ll play. I want to see how good you’ve gotten. Maybe you can actually kick my ass for once,” He laughed slightly trying to get the blonde lad to come around.

Niall peeking his head up looking at Louis for a moment before nodding and smiling. “Yeah, okay.”

“Louis,” Harry said sternly.

“Yes Harold?” He mocked.

“No.”

The boys stood to the side just watching the two. “I can play a fucking game Harry. I’ve done everything else,” Louis said as he put the game in the system and started it up.

“One of the other lads can play. I think it would be best if you sit out.”

“He asked to play with me. So I’m going to play with my friend.”

“No, you’re not,” Harry said gritting his teeth.

“Yes, I am,” Louis shot right back.

“Keep testing me Louis, see where that’s going to get you.”

“Let get real for a minute Harry,” Louis said standing up causing Harry to mimic the action, but in a much more intimidating way that almost had Louis drop, but he stood his ground. “You were going to beat me anyways and we both know it.” Louis heard the boys gasp, but his mind was racing and shit, this was happening wasn’t it? They were going to fight in front of their friends.

“Only because you deserve it,” Harry growled. “You’re just a fat worthless piece of shit Louis!”

“Then I don’t see why I can’t just eat fucking pizza and actually have fun with my friends and play some games if it was going to happen anyways!”

“You don’t deserve to have fun Louis! You’re mine and I said no!”

“Well too damn bad!”

Harry growled before lunging forward and tackling Louis to the ground sitting on top of him, pinning his arms down. “I’m sorry, want to repeat that?”

“Do it Harry. Fucking hit me in front of them,” Louis said. “I dare you,” He added.

Harry punched Louis across the face. “Shut up!”

“You’re a real man Harry, beating on me, calling me names. You’re a real fucking prize!”

Harry started pounding on Louis. Punching him hard making Louis’ head spin. The boys rushed over trying to pull him off, but Harry fought back screaming. Once Louis had an opening he returned fire throwing punches Harry’s way. They went back and forth until finally Liam and Zayn had Harry pinned down and Niall was holding Louis back. “I hate you so much Louis!”

“I hate you right back!”

“It’s all your fault you know?!”

“Of course it is, because you never do anything wrong!” Louis said rolling his eyes.

Liam and Zayn struggled to hold Harry down as he fought trying to get to Louis. “You’re going to pay.”

And pay he did. The boys all argued that night. Not wanting Louis to leave with Harry, but he ignored them and said he would be fine and talk to them later. When they got home Harry beat Louis leaving him unconscious on the floor for several hours. Louis had to stay in bed for a few days because his body couldn’t handle it.

    “Why didn’t you let your friends help?”

    “I didn’t want them to worry because I had it under control. They knew we fought, but we never really hung out again so they didn’t see what happened.”

    “What have they said to you since you got out of the relationship?” Stine asked.

    “Niall cried, Liam tried to assure me it was for the best, and Zayn was just angry. They were all angry really. They hated that they didn’t do anything. They hated that I didn’t say anything. They’ve been treating me like a fragile baby and watching my every move,” Louis said crossing his arms.

    “It’s only because they care about you Louis. Don’t you think you should listen to your friends?”

    “I love them, I do, but they don’t understand what it’s like. They don’t know how I or Harry felt, feel. I miss him, I miss it,” Louis admitted. “You would think I would cherish the few good times we had, but no. Those are the times I want to forget. I want to remember the bad. I want to think of all the fights we had, all the time we fought both with words and with fists. I want it back. Am I crazy?”

    “You’re saying you like the pain?”

Harry had Louis by the front of the shirt holding him flush against this chest. Both smiling evilly at one another. “Hit me again,” Louis whispered against Harry’s lips. “I dare you,” He smirked.

Harry just grinning right back as he punched Louis in the eye and again on his chin. “Fucking slut. It’s like you do it on purpose.”

“I might,” Louis shrugged.

“You’re mine, and only mind do you understand that?” Harry asked grabbing Louis hair tightly and yanking on it to expose his neck.

“You don’t own me.” Louis gasped as Harry bit into Louis’ skin roughly.

“I beg to differ,’ He mumbled before biting over and over again.

“You’re just an asshole.”

Harry shoved Louis to the ground before climbing on top of him. “Say it again,” Harry dared.

“You’re. Just. An. Asshole,” Louis smirked.

Harry lifted Louis up by the shirt before slamming him back down on the ground. “I love hurting you. You’re so weak.”

“Not weak,” Louis said grinning. “I love being hurt.”

Harry growled before kissing Louis roughly, surely bruising their lips. Harry bit Louis’ bottom lip and pulled making the boy whimper. “You’re so fucked up.”

“You’re just as crazy as I am.”

Harry slapped Louis. “Crazy?”

Louis nodded. “Psychotic.”

Harry stood up kicking Louis in the side. “You’re just a punching bag to me Louis.”

Louis grinning trying his best to focus in on Harry as his eye was swelling shut. “You couldn’t resist me even if you wanted it.”

Harry kicked him again, but harder. “You’re nothing to me.”

“I’m everything to you.”

Kick. “I don’t care about you.”

“You love me, just as I love you.”

The rest of the night was a blur of rough kisses and hands everywhere hitting, pulling, and scratching until his body was covered with bruises. Louis stayed home for a few days again until he could see and move.

    “I crave pain. I get a thrill off of it, just as he gets a thrill off of giving it to me.”

    “I get it.”

    “Get what.”

    “Why you two stuck together. You had a sado-masochism relationship.” Louis raised his eyebrow confused. “Harry was your sadist, the person who likes inflicting pain onto others. You were his masochists, the person who liked receiving the pain.”

A/N: Hello Soldiers! Sooo, what did you guys think of this one? One more part after this and it has 4 flashbacks and then an end part. Hope you guys are liking it. Remember you've already been warned so I post no warning. I will tell you that the next one starts off wicked rough for the flashback and it's graphic so yeah. Vote, comment, follow, blah blah blah you know the drill! x

-Ashley, Cult Leader x