Austin's POV
I walked over to Alan and slowly picked him up from the floor. He fisted his hands into my shirt and his silent tears made the cloth damp. I took him to the couch and sat down with him.
"I lost them." He said in broken sobs. "Momma died and I ki-illed Mason." He said and then everything stopped. It was like time stood still. His tears stopped falling and he looked at me with a blank stare. I wasn't even sure if he was breathing.

"Alan baby?"
"I...I killed him." He said in a low whisper and I pressed him tight to my chest rocking him back and forth.
"Alan no. Don't even think that. It was an accident. No one could have prevented it. It was the other drivers fault." I kissed the top of his head and he looked back up at me before slowly climbing off my lap.

He just stood in front of the couch. He looked so out of place. His face was red and puffy, his clothes looked beaten if that was possible and Alan just looked small. It was like he was shrinking in on himself. His arms were hugging himself tightly as If he were cold and his body shook gently.

"Austin what's the nois-, ALLY!" I heard Cole bound down the rest of the stairs and he nearly tackled Alan. He latched himself on to his legs and still Alan just stood their with his arms wrapped around himself. Cole took a step back and looked up at him. "Ally?" He questioned and he must have snapped back to reality because he gave a weak smile to Cole before squatting down and wrapping him in his arms.
"I love you so much." I heard him say and sat down on his butt and pulled Cole into his lap.

I left the two alone and went to fix them something too eat. Once I finished I came back in the room and Cole was watching cartoons while Alan was sitting on the couch with his knees pulled to his chest. I handed Cole his food and he thanked me happily before eating. I looked over at Alan who was just staring into space. I sat beside of him and handed him the food. It took him all of an hour before he said he was done and he didn't even eat half of it.

I hated seeing Alan like this but I understood in a way. Anyone who had been through what he had the last twenty-four hours would have broke  down too. I couldn't imagine how he was feeling, especially after he admitted that he thought he was the one that killed Mason.

All day Alan just sat on the couch. If Cole or I talked to him he would acknowledge us but wouldn't respond with but a few words. He was just silent. That night he didn't even move off of the couch and Cole, refusing to leave him, slept on he couch beside of him. I tried to get Alan to at least lay down and eventually he stretched out on the couch but I don't think he actually went to sleep. I dozed on and off I was just too worried about him.

Around mid day the next day the hospital called and I drove Alan over to take care of everything. He clutched my hand tightly the whole time. The next stop we had was the funeral home. He had to plan not one but two funerals. There was going to be a joint funeral and luckily Brenda showed up and took care of most of the details. Alan wanted it over with so the funeral was actually taking place tomorrow.

We got back to the house and Alan crawled into my lap and held on to me tightly.
"Princess will you please talk to me?" I said and kissed his forehead.
"I love you." He said and I smiled. "And I'm sorry for shutting down."
"Alan you've handled this pretty freaking great if you ask me."
"I just, I miss them Austin. I know it hasn't been long but it feels like I should be checking on Momma right now while Cole played with Mason. I just don't know what to do anymore."

"I feel so guilty. I feel like I could have done something, anything, to stop what happened but I can't. I feel lost in a way. I just want sit and stare off into space. I don't want to do anything but I can't just stop my life. As much as I want to press the pause button, I can't. I have Cole and I don't even know how he's taking all of this."
"He's strong like you Alan." I said and kissed him. "You've gotta take this one day at a time and with the sad remember the good. All the fun times you guys had. Don't try to make the memories fade. Yeah it may hurt but keep them alive in your heart. I know I sound so sappy right now but it's the truth. They want you to be happy."

"How did I get so lucky to find someone like you." He said and faced me while on my lap. He cupped my face and kissed me gently. "Thank you."
"No need to thank me sweetheart. I'll always be here." I said and brushed his hair back. "Through everything."
He smiled at me. The first time he had actually really smiled since it all happened and I couldn't help but to smile back. It was then I realized that he would be alright. It would take some time but Alan was strong and he could take whatever life threw at him; and I would be there to help him every step of the way.