-Taehyung P.O.V-

I knocked on the bathroom door rapidly. It opened after a few seconds and I pushed the person inside away to get to the toilet bowl, emptying my stomach in one heap. I continued to throw up even when it was empty, stomach acid following. My throat burned painfully and my eyes teared up.

I quickly flushed the toilet and collapsed besides it.

"Let's go call the doctor" Baekhyun commented from the doorway. I tried to shake my head but quickly gave up as it hurt a painful lot. My breath was ragged and sometimes I couldn't breathe at all.

"Your nose is bleeding again" Beakhyun got a tissue and held it to my nose. It was stained red within a few seconds. He got a new one, and a new one, and a new one, until the bleeding finally stopped. Baekhyung helped me up carefully, supporting me from my side when my legs didn't seem to be able to handle the little weight I had.

"What's going on?" Chanyeol asked when he walked in.

"Take Taehyung, I'll call the hospital for a checkup, now please" Baekhyun handed me over and went to grab the phone.

"Let's get you to the couch" the taller lifted me up easily and carried me downstairs. I let my arms fall down weakly, my head agains Chanyeol's warm neck. I breathed in and out slowly, my breath hitching a few times.

"Yes, thank you for making time, have a very nice day ma'am" Baekhyun came from the kitchen, ending the call.

"An appointment dropped out, we're lucky, we'll have to be there in an hour" he smiled slightly and sat besides me when Chanyeol placed me on the couch. I leaned my head on his shoulder and almost fell asleep when he started stroking my hair.

"Don't worry, it'll be alright"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Who knew that it wouldn't. Because a week after the check up, we got the results.

"Cancer?"

"Unfortunately yes, it has spread already, it's in the lungs and the prostate as seen in the CT scan" the oncologist, Mr. Kim, continued calmly. I sat there shocked.

I have cancer.

I felt a hand hold my own and looked besides me to look at Baekhyun, but I couldn't see what he was feeling or thinking about.

"What about treatment?" He asked. He seemed to get a bit panicky, his hands started shake slightly.

"We can do chemotherapy, there are four stages, it will be a difficult trial, but there is a chance it will work. I can't say it's a big chance, seeing that the cancer cells have been multiplying quickly these last two months or so." The doctor said truthfully. A lone tear ran down my cheek.

"What are the odds? Is there any other treatment? I heard about those experimental medicine? Or those-" I gripped Baekhyun's hand tightly, stopping him. I shot a look to Chanyeol, who got up and guided his stressed boyfriend out.

I watched them before turning back to the doctor, the only other person in the room.

"What are the odds chemo will work" I asked calmly.

"Maybe 45 percent, if not less" he admitted. "It has been spread out a bit already, so the odds chemo will work to destroy the tumours and spreadings completely is small, it might even return even after it went away" Mr. Kim sighed.

"So I'll have to ready my testimony?" I laughed humorlessly.

"I'm afraid that would be a smart thing to do" he sighed.

"What are the side effects of chemotherapy?"

"It depends on each person, but common ones are; loss of hair, dry skin and changes in colour of your skin, anaemia, easy bruising and bleeding, fatigue , itches, infertility, dizziness, nausea and vomiting, constipation, diarrhoea, lack of concentration and focus, pain when swallowing, infections and you might have changes in weight, urine, your bladder and your appetite." He named slowly. I nodded in understanding, biting my lip in concentration.

"The costs?"

"It's a lot, I don't know if it's affordable"

"I have my college money and I work, is that perhaps enough?" I asked, he thought for a few seconds before nodding slowly.

"How will it work?"

"You'll have a weekly treatment, for two weeks and then a week rest, before the cycle starts over again. You'll be in a large room in a hospital, unless you want a more private area but that adds to the costs, there you will get a catheter in your chest the first treatment, since we don't want to damage your veins too much with the needles, this treatment is called intrapleural chemo, if you want further information. You'll get an IV with the chemo amongst other drug solutions to improve your immune system, the amount of chemo is based on your body weight, which is why we will weight you before treatments to measure the dose. It's take about two or three hours in total. After that you can go home" he explained shortly.

"When can we start?"

"In two weeks, you'll have to sign the documents next week and there will be any further explanation if needed by then."

"Thank you Mr. Kim" I left the office after our conversation ended. Chanyeol and Baekhyun were already waiting in the car, in which I joined them a few minutes later. We sped off home silently, no one dared to speak.

I walked out of the car, following Baekhyun and Chanyeol through the front door. We took off our shoes and jackets silently and sat on the couch.

"I'm starting in two weeks, I'll call an accountant and notary to handle the costs and I'll make my testament. I'm going back to my own house, I don't want to bother you with this" I said calmly.

"We want to help, it's going to be hard Tae, you'll need us. We love you Tae, we want-" I cut Baekhyun off.

"I love you guys too, which is why I wont stay here with you. Cancer is a bitch, I'm going to be a wreck and I don't want you guys to see me like that. You know it's going to be a freak show" I stood up and walked uptairs to grab all my stuff and threw it in my dufflebag, struggling to carry it downstairs.

"Tae don't do this" Chanyeol walked to me, looking grim.

"I'll visit you guys, I just don't want you to see me like that and you guys have to work, I can't stay in your house while you guys are working and I'm throwing up or bleeding all over your couch" I sighed, running a hand through my hair. I was already stressed and the chemo hadn't even started.

"What about Jungkook?" Baekhyun suddenly asked.

"He's always out anyway, he won't have to know, please just don't tell him. I'll be better before he'll notice." I almost begged. Beakhyung took me in his arms and hugged me tightly as though I was dying. Ironically I actually was. Chanyeol joined the hug and held us both, being larger. I sobbed softly, the strong facade I held when talking had finally broken.

"You're going to have to tell him" Baekhyun said.

"I can't, atleast not now" I sniffed and held him closer before letting go. Why couldn't he be my brother?

"I'll take you home, let's go" Chanyeol kissed both of our foreheads and grabbed the dufflebag from the floor. I nodded and pulled away, following Chanyeol to the car. I waved at Baekhyun who stood on the porch.

"If you need anything, call me" Chanyeol said once we were on the road. "I get that you don't want us to see you, but you'll need someone to support you. We both know that, and we both know you'll have to tell Jungkook soon"

"I know"

"Good, you know that we'll do anything, even if it's laundry or grocery shopping or cooking or cleaning, anything"

"Thank you" I said sincerely.

"Don't worry about it, you're family" he smiled and patted my leg. "Let's get you inside" he grabbed the bag from the backseat and opened the front door as I walked behind him slowly.

We walked inside, stumbling upon Jungkook and Jimin sitting on the couch. I hadn't been home for about 2 weeks or so, the house as dirty, pizza boxes lying everywhere, dust was visible on the furnature. A headache was already forming.

"You're back" Jungkook simply commented as he stood up. The mood was ruined as he spoke.

"And it won't be for long if you don't clean this up yourself" Chanyeol spook for me and carried the bag upstairs, probably putting it in my room.

"Where have you been?" Jungkook stupidly asked.

"Out" I mumbled and went to the kitchen to grab something to drink, putting some of the pizza boxes aside to get to the tab.

"Yah, don't ignore me" my brother followed me.

"Please, Shut up" I muttered as a painful headache came up.

"Don't tell me to shut up, you're not my mom" he sputtered.

"No, mom's dead, as is dad, so I'm your legal guardian, and I'm telling you to shut up, I'm not in the mood, please" Just then Chanyeol walked down again.

"Tae, I put your stuff in your drawers, I'll bring your clothes from the laundry tomorrow." Chanyeol kissed my forehead and glared at Jungkook before walking out the door. He really did consider me as his kid, or at least his brother.

"I'm going to bed" I mumbled.

"But it's not even four in the afternoon" Jungkook said confused.

"I don't care, I'm tired"

I walked up the stairs and went straight to bed, only bothering to strip off my pants. I laid under the cold comforters and closed my eyes. A few tears leaked through my eyelids as I thought about today.

Was I really going to die of cancer? Probably.

Would I get bald? Yes, I wasn't looking forward to that.

Will I ever have kids? No.

Will I see Baekhyun and Chanyeol's wedding? Probably not.

I hate death, it's the painful truth