Ch. 65 - More Guy Problems
~ Chapter 65: More Guy Problems ~
[ Jackie’s POV: ]
My hands were shaking as I continued to stare at Tyler with wide eyes. I tried to say something, but the words just wouldn’t come out. Eventually I managed to speak up a bit.
“What are you doing here?” I said in a hushed voice.
Tyler’s gaze never left mine. “I told you… I want you back, Jackie. I’m not just gonna give up on you that easily.”
I ran a hand through my hair as Robin eyed me carefully as if to ask if I wanted him out. She could’ve easily shoved him off and slammed the door, but I came to the conclusion that that just wouldn’t solve anything at this point.
“Make it quick, Tyler,” I said, simultaneously letting Robin know I wanted to hear him out. “But know this… My heart is set on Justin. No matter how complicated things get, I’m not going to give up on him.”
Tyler’s facial expression saddened a bit. “And there’s no way I can possibly change your mind?”
I bit my lip, feeling a bit guilty. Tyler’s such a nice guy but.. I’m not the one for him. I’m sure he’ll find some other lucky girl who would want him, need him, and treat him the way he deserves. “I don’t think so.. Sorry.”
“I see…” Tyler trailed off, a look of disappointment in his face. There was an awkward silence before he continued. “I, um.. also heard what’s being said about you… And they couldn’t be more wrong. You’re wonderful, Jackie. So don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
“Thanks,” I fiddled with my thumbs, not knowing what else to say to him. “C-Can we.. Maybe continue this some other time? There’s somewhere important I have to be right now.”
He opened his mouth to ask where I was going, but he ultimately decided against it.
“Alright,” he sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “I’ll go.” He glanced at Robin, who was staring at him with disapproving eyes. “Take care, girls.”
He waved at us and began to make his way out of the front porch. I let out a long, deep breath I didn’t even know I was holding in, feeling the stress remain upon my shoulders.
“You better go be doing what I think you’re gonna go do,” Robin glared at me.
“I am, Robin.” I grabbed my car keys and my purse, quickly slipping my phone into one of its small pockets.
“I’m going to go make things right with Justin.”
—
[ Justin’s POV: ]
I sat lazily on the couch, staring at the television in front of me. A few minutes later, my mom walked out in casual clothing and the fancy purse I got her for her birthday last year.
“Uh, honey,” she stopped a few feet away from me. I slowly turned my head to meet her gaze. “Are you okay?”
I tilted my head slightly to the right. I feel as dead as a zombie, I felt like saying. But, obviously, that’s not what ended up coming out of my mouth.
“Of course,” I said, “Why?”
“Because you’re sitting there… Watching tv.. And it’s not even turned on,” a look of concern was on her face. I looked back at the television and realized it was off.
Wow, I was staring into space this whole time? I really can’t focus right now, can I? Not when I feel like Jackie just ditched me the day after our first date to rendezvous with that son of a bitch.
Alright, alright. Tyler doesn’t necessarily seem like a bad guy. But he’s a threat to me right now and I don’t like it.
“Sorry,” I breathed, “I was just thinking.”
“About what?”
I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it, Mom.” I looked at her again. “Where are you going, anyways?”
“Your grandparents just arrived here today and they’re staying at a different hotel. I’m going to go visit them. You wanna come with?” she offered.
I leaned my head back on the couch. “No. I’ll go see them later.”
“You sure?” she raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, mother.”
She gave me a weird look before looking around the room. “Where’s Jackie?”
I felt a sudden ache in my heart.
“Um,” I paused. “She went home.”
“So quickly? I wish I could’ve gotten the chance to talk to her a bit more. She seems like a nice girl,” Mom smiled before adjusting her purse strap onto her shoulder. “Well, see you later my precious angel.”
I groaned. “I’m not 5, mom.”
“I love you, my wittle cuppy cake,” she cooed at me as she opened the front door and stepped outside.
“I love you too, mommy,” I laughed, playing along before she was gone, and I was back to staring at a blank t.v.
As several thoughts began to circulate inside my head, I decided to close my eyes and disregard from thinking about anything right now. After a while, everything became blank and there was a sudden sound of a bell ringing.
My eyes shot open and, from the way they felt a bit heavy, I realized I had quickly fallen asleep and the doorbell had woken me up.
I let out a small groan and forced myself to stand up before making my way towards the door. I mindlessly grabbed the doorknob, turned it, and swung the door open, only to reveal Jackie’s beautiful face in front of me.
My breath hitched.
“Hey,” Jackie whispered, a sorry look on her face.
“What do you want?” I glared at her.
She inhaled a deep breath. “Look.. I know you’re mad at me..” she began.
“I am,” I simply answered.
She pouted before continuing. “And I don’t blame you. But.. I’m sorry for running out like that, and the whole Tyler thing isn’t really what you think. So, if you would be so kind as to let me inside, I’ll explain everything.”
“Do you still love me?” I asked, out of the blue.
She did a double take. “Wh—Of course I do! Whoever said I stopped?”
I examined her carefully before slowly stepping aside, letting her in. She walked inside silently as I closed the door behind her and turned around, watching as she sat down on the couch. She looked up at me with her sparkling, green eyes before tapping the spot next to her, asking me to sit down.
I bit my lip, obeying her orders.
“I overreacted today,” she said. “Even though I said I don’t care what happens as long as I’m with you, I couldn’t deal with the fact that people were hating on me, just like they do to you.”
My eyes slowly widened. It can’t be.
“Paparazzi caught us on our date yesterday. There are pictures all over the media and people are sending hate. Mostly to me, because I’m a new face that the whole world is seeing. I’m practically fresh meat. I couldn’t help but read everything people were saying about me—calling me a slut and other offensive terms and… I freaked out. I didn’t know how to deal with it. I was upset and broken and I didn’t know what to do so I just left. It was very, very stupid of me, yes. And I regret it, yes. But I wasn’t thinking. And as for Tyler, he was just trying to see how I was doing, since he heard about what happened. And, even if he had other intentions, my heart is still set on you.”
I slowly moved closer towards her, landing a hand on her lap.
“You should’ve told me,” I whispered. “I go through this every day and… I could’ve calmed you down a bit.”
“I know..” she sighed. “I’m sorry.”
“See? This is why I began pushing you away in the first place,” I spoke softly. “This is what I was fucking afraid of.”
“Don’t be,” Jackie let out a warm smile. “I’ll learn how to deal with it. Even though I wasn’t thinking clearly last time, doesn’t mean I don’t mean it when I say that everything will be fine as long as I’m with you. I don’t care what it takes.”
“You say that now, but the hate will get unbearable later,” I looked at her. “There were times were even I wanted to end it, but I didn’t quite know how.”
Jackie frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Huh?”
“What do you mean by you wanted to end it?” her face was serious. “You thought of suicide?”
“T-That’s not what I meant,” I quickly defended myself.
“But did you?”
I stared deep into her eyes, my heartbeat picking up twice its speed.
“Um… I.. don’t..”
“Justin,” she warned. “Have you, or have you not thought about killing yourself to escape this hateful world?”
I felt a sweat begin to form on my forehead.
“Y-Yeah,” my voice cracked.
“Yes?” she asked for clarification.
I nodded slowly.
“No… No, you shouldn’t think like that! Ever. You’re being really selfish like that!!” she cried out, tears forming in her eyes.
I looked at her in shock, not expecting her to react this sadly and angrily.
“Don’t,” she smacked my arm, “ever,” she smacked my arm, “think,” she smacked it harder, “like that again!” She yelled, tears streaming down her face. “You c-can’t leave m-me… You can’t l-leave your b-beliebers.”
I continued to watch her as she dug her face in both hands, weeping uncontrollably. My heart skipped a beat. I didn’t think she’d care this much.
No one—not even Alicia—has ever cried at the thought of me not feeling well emotionally.
No, not like this.
“Hey,” I whispered soothingly. “It’s okay.. I’m not going to leave you. I’m not going to leave anyone.”
I wrapped my arms around her small body and pulled her towards me, running my hand up and down her back.
“Shh..” I whispered. “It’s alright, baby.”
I felt my shirt beginning to get wet with her tears. I kissed the top of her head multiple times as I waited for her to calm down.
“It’s alright,” I soothed. “I love you, okay?”
She nodded quietly.
“Do you love me too?” I asked, and she smacked my arm again, this time more playfully.
“Of course I do, you idiot,” her voice was shaky from the crying she had just done, but she still managed a small smile.
I let out a soft laugh and leaned even closer towards her, pressing my lips lightly against hers and feeling those butterflies I always feel when we kiss.
True, I’ve thought about suicide a couple of times.
But there are people out there who love you, even when you don’t know them yet. You just gotta hang in there.
Jackie was right. To think like that is pretty selfish of me. I mean, what would happen to the people who love me if I died?
I’d only be thinking about myself and not others. Which is why it’s so vital… So absolutely important that I stay alive.
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How’d you guys like this chapter?
I, again, apologize for my delay on updates last week, which is why I updated twice this week! (yay!)
See you guys next weekend :)
- Nina xx
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