i don't know what to do anymore. I've literally fucking hid my feelings forever and now i just cant deal with this bullshit. so if you've met me or know me you know I'm a 'narcissist'...that's only half true. becauseee I have convinced myself that im in complete love with myself to ignore the fact that i have a deep hatred for myself. it works until you fucking lose your shit. today my dad got mad...no fucking idea why, he had been smocking pot maybe but he started yelling at me. so what did i do. i sat there with a fucking grin on my face. guess what happened. i got slapped... 

thats only at home. i went to get on my bus and im the second person on the bus. we stop at this trailer park to pick up an older girl and she gets on and sits across from me. for half the ride she was staring at me. i was extra insecure that day bc i was wearing a skirt. so at the end of the ride she starts talking to me. saying how weird my body was, that my face was ugly, this bitch sat across me saying this shit like, dood, i already know how damn weird i am. Jesus tits. 

i get to school some days and ive had this one person tug at my hair. its just annoying.

this is a rant so no one get worried. and im perfectly happy the way i am, i have two beautiful girlfriends that are always there for me, they can always tell when somethings bothering me. its nice to know that someones always gonna be there for me. and my bestest buddies in indiana are always there too. im just trying my best.