I grab Vi's arm and pull her roughly towards me. We don't have time for tenderness, and our kiss is rough and quick. I don't hear anything while I'm holding Vi in my arms but someone comes and separates us. The dark haired man says to Luke, "If you don't restrain him, we kill the boy." Luke looks at Vi and she nods.

"I'm so sorry, Ashton." Luke says. he grabs my arms and pulls me back. What the hell? Why is he doing this? I can't just leave Vi! I struggle against him and he calls Ricky over for help. Together they're able to pin my hands behind me. Luke is practically hugging me, whether that's the best way he knows to restrain me or because he thinks I need comforting I don't know. Aaron is shoved somewhere but I don't really care. My attention is focused on getting away from my friends and getting back to Vi.

I try going limp.

I try jumping.

I try to spin in a circle.

Nothing I do will make them let go of me.

I hate both of them.

"Luke,"

"Ashton stop." Luke pleads. He has tears rolling down his cheeks. This is hard for him too, I know that. Do I really think he wants to do this? Of course not. But he had to make a choice.

I hear Vi quietly say, "It's okay everyone. I've always wanted to be a hero."

I feel tears running down my cheeks as I listen to her words. She thinks she's going to die, that she's never going to see us again.

Of course she is. I can't survive without her. I will find her.

"I love you, Vi. I'll never stop looking for you. I'll find you!"

I wake up from this nightmare, surprised it didn't take an awful turn like it usually does. Maybe because this dream is already awful, my mind says. This one was actually accurate, unlike the other nightmares I have when Vi ends up dead or Luke becomes the kidnapper. Weird.

It's 5:45, so I get up and make breakfast.

Finals are pretty much over, so today I decided to visit Flora, my adopted grandmother. I've been taking over for Vi while she's...gone, and I've got some questions to ask her.

Vi mentions something about Flora's grandsons in her diary, which I've stayed up the last four nights reading from cover to cover, then starting over again. I don't know where I'm supposed to start with this, but I guess this is somewhere. It's one of the bigger things I have to go off of.

After eating a little bit of eggs and toast, I feel a bit better. That's the first proper meal I've eaten in a while, and I feel a little better because of it. I actually smile. Maybe it's a sign, maybe I'll be able to get somewhere today.

With an actual positive outlook, I take a quick, but pointless shower. Even though I'll need to take one after mowing the lawn, I felt gross because I sweat so much during my nightmares and smelled terrible.

I wait around, looking at the journal and making notes about potential follow ups for later when it nears seven. I never thought I was a morning person until my nightmares woke me up. Now I don't mind mornings.

I drive over to Flora's and park in the driveway.

I walk around to the back door and knock before letting myself in.

"Morning, Flora!" I call.

"Hello, dear!" I hear softly. She must not be in the kitchen.

I walk inside, finding her sitting at the piano in the dining room.

"How are you this morning?" She gets up and hugs me. I hold on to her tightly, knowing she misses Vi almost as much as I do. I remember the morning I went over the first time after Vi was kidnapped. Someone had called her to let her know that Vi wouldn't be able to help anymore, not explaining why, but that they'd find a replacement for her soon. Flora told them she didn't need it anymore and called Vi, but when she got no answer, she called me. All I could do was cry as I told her what happened, and she cried with me. She's the only person who's truly been understanding, and the two of us will often sit and chat until the early afternoon, recalling things about Vi that made us happy.

Flora's was the only place I went to during my month long depression. It was the only place I felt like I could go to.

"I'm getting better, actually."

"Really?"

I nod.

"Yeah, I ate breakfast today." She offers a genuine smile at that. "And you know how I've been reading her diary?"

Flora nods.

She never judged me for any of my "obsessions". She just listened to me and gave me honest reactions to what I was saying, and she told me that there might be a chance, but also it could turn up nothing. I admire her practicality, which is another reason why I feel like I can tell her anything. She's not going to give me false hope, and she's not going to shut me down because she can't handle getting her hopes up.

"Well, I found something in it that I think could be helpful."

"That's wonderful dear!"

"Yes. I'm going to do the lawn, and then maybe we can talk about it? It concerns you..."

"Of course. I'll be here." She winks and I chuckle before heading outside. She makes that joke all the time. I take Vi's phone out of my pocket and plug in her headphones. The police tracked her phone and found it in the grass right outside of campus. They must have thrown it outside while they were driving away to keep us from being able to track her.

I open up her Spotify and play her lawn mowing playlist, which is just a bunch of fast paced, high energy songs she could hear over the roar of the mower. A lot of them were from her favorite band, 5 Seconds of Summer. She liked to tease me that the drummer was cuter than me, but we all knew that wasn't true.

About an hour later, I finish up trimming the edges, sweeping up the grass clippings, and put all the tools away in the garage, making sure to shut the white door hard so it stays shut. The door likes to stick, and Vi was very specific that I had to make sure it was shut properly.

I went inside to talk to Flora.

She hands me a washcloth so I can wipe my face of the sweat and had set a newspaper down on the floor outside the backdoor so I can put my muddy, grass-covered shoes on it and not track mess in her house.

After I finish cleaning up, I sit down at the kitchen table in Vi's chair, in front of me is a big cup of water. Flora likes routine and tradition, and she always makes me drink the water before I can have anything else. I gulp it down quickly and she smiles, taking it from me before setting a plate of cookies and an orange in front of me. She always had cookies for Vi, and she still makes them for me, but on that first day I met her, I ate an orange, so she always makes sure to have one for me. She's really the cutest, I'm glad she's my adopted grandmother.

"So, what do you have to talk about?" She brings a mug of tea over to the table for herself and sits down.

"Well, when I was reading the journal, I saw she mentioned something about your grandsons. It wasn't a full, complete entry, just a brief mention where she was confused about who they were. There's also mention in another entry of the fact that they were the ones who set up your lawn care with the volunteer club since they were too busy to do it for you. She said she'd met them."

Flora frowns and sighs, furrowing her brows to think.

"You know, she mentioned once, actually it was on the day I met you, something about my grandsons. I don't have any grandsons older than 8." My eyes widen. "I only have granddaughters, which is what I told her, but she asked about the grandsons from my husbands first marriage. He was never married before me. We met when we were 16 or so, it's not really possible he had a secret marriage. Not that he would, he was the most honest, kind man you could imagine." I smile at Flora's defense for her late husband. It's clear how much she cares about her family.

"That's really strange. Who did Vi meet then?" Something isn't adding up here. I feel myself get a bit excited. That means there is something here. This is the first lead I've had, and this could lead me to her. "Do you have any paper? I want to write this down so I can keep track of what's happening."

Flora nods and brings a small notepad and pen over. The notepad is one of the ones that has a magnet on the back so it can go on the fridge. It's probably for grocery lists, and the top of it has a little basket of flowers and Flora's name on it. I rip the top page off and start to write little notes about the "grandsons". I also make a note to read the passage about the day Vi met them to see if there's any clues there.

"So how did you hear about the volunteer clubs lawn mowing service?"

"I got a flyer in the mail and was given a number to call. Whoever I talked to told me he'd get it all set up for me. I told him about my situation and he asked when I wanted someone to come, and took down my information and said someone would be out on Saturday. And then I met Vi." She smiles sadly. "I'd made myself pancakes for breakfast, I wasn't expecting her to show up so early. Apparently she's in a feud with that Chelsea girl, so she told Vi she had to be here early. But Vi didn't mind, she said."

"She's more of a morning person than me," I chuckle, getting lost in Flora's story.

"I know, dear, she's told me." Flora winks and I feel my face heat up a bit. "She was so cute the first couple times she was here, hesitant but kind. She always thanked me a million times, and asked so many questions about my family. It's how I knew she really cared about me."

"Vi cares about everybody. That's her thing, even if it means she'll put herself in danger." I sniff, not sure if I'm sad or angry and Flora puts a comforting hand on my arms which are crossed and resting on the table.

"She's a hero, don't be too hard on her. She was doing what she thought was best, even if we don't understand why. It's not that she didn't trust you, I think in her own crazy way, she was just trying to protect you."

Flora understood. Or at least she was more sympathetic than anyone else in my life. My parents didn't understand my infatuation with her, my friends thought I was crazy. Only Vi and Flora were truly understanding of me.

"But we're a team. She should have told me about it and we could have worked it out together."

"Sometimes it takes a while for someone to realize that. I'm pretty sure something terrible happened to that girl when she was younger, and sometimes that can really mess a person up."

"What makes you say that?" I ask. I've had the same feelings, but I want to know if Vi trusted Flora enough to tell her.

"No one is as kind and caring as she is without knowing true pain. It's often the people who know what it's like not to have something who exhibit that characteristic the most. Vi might not have had much love given to her growing up, so she goes out of her way to show it to everyone she meets."

I think about that as I drive home later. What if something traumatic did happen to her? Would she have written about it in her journal? Is that the reason why she wouldn't let me do things for her when we first met? She mentioned that her ex used to hit her. Maybe that's got something to do with it?

There's so much I have to figure out, but I do know that the moment I find her, I'm going to care for her the best I can. I'm going to be the person she can trust with her secrets.

***

Floras getting deep 😳 I feel like it either works like that, or the person becomes so lost in their hurt that they do the exact things that hurt them to others. Guess it really depends on the person 🤷‍♀️ but anyway. (and to think almost everyone was suspicious of my dear Flora at the beginning 😒😂) 

Felt super motivated to write today; I'm at 1k reads which is super awesome!! :D so happy double update :) woooot

If you've got anything on your mind, feel free to drop it here! or pm me if you want! could be anything you want, deep, random, funny, sad. whatever kind of mood you're in rn.

~ashtonfortherwin