WILDER

With a big bottle of wine in one hand and my phone in the other, I played a song that I thought would help me get rid of the pain in my chest. I was dead wrong. It only melted me down into a pile of emotional mush.

"Wherever you go," I sang along with a broken heart, then sniffled. "Whatever you do."

I was laying on my stomach in my bed, so drunk and miserable, sobbing like a toddler who lost his favorite blanket. Tris was my comfort blanket, my teddy bear, my everything since I found out I had feelings for him in high school.

"I will be right here waiting for you."

https://youtu.be/wve_fVwljpk

I chugged the remaining liquid from the bottle before I cried my eyes out. I sank my face in my arm and wept. I looked so pathetic. If anyone walked in on me right now they wouldn't recognize me. My hair was all messy and my face was red and covered in tears and snot.

Yup. Definitely, not a sexy look on me.

"Whatever it takes or how my heart—" my voice cracked and I couldn't finish.

I put the phone aside and wiped my tears, still heaving and shaking with heavy sobs. I couldn't tell if I was seeing blurry images because of the tears or because I was wasted as fuck. Probably both.

The song kept playing:

"I will be right here waiting for you."

"Stupid... drink." I slurred at the wine bottle before tossing it aside. "You were supposed to make me feel better."

But I felt worse.

Tris was gone. I didn't know where to find him. He was not answering my calls. I phoned his sister earlier so she'd convince him to talk, but she didn't get back to me. What else could I do?

"I took for granted all the times
That I thought would last somehow."

When I was out giving Tristen some space, I didn't return until way later. I thought giving him more time would be good for him. You could imagine my shock when I returned and didn't find him in the apartment. His clothes were gone, his shoes, supplies, everything.

And the worst part was, I don't think he's ever coming back.

"I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now."

I didn't even get a chance to tell him I loved him... and now he was gone.

"Oh, can't you see it, baby?" I swayed my head to the song lyrics as my voice turned into a loud wail of hurt and sorrow. "You've got me goin' crazy."

The song stopped as my phone rang. I picked it up as quickly and clumsily as possible. It was a FaceTime call from my twin twelve-year-old sisters. Either it was the twins or I was seeing doubles. Actually, I was seeing quadruples.

Nah, I'm not that drunk, I convinced myself before answering.

"Heyyyy, what's up—" I burped "—girls?"

Their smiles turned upside down.

"What's wrong with your voice?" Sophia said. Or was it Isabella? I couldn't tell the difference anymore.

"And your face?" the other one said with her tiny cute voice.

"Are you sad?"

"Are you crying?"

"What happened to you?"

Woah. Too many questions all at once. I couldn't follow. I shook my head to clear my thoughts.

"I'm fine," I dragged with a goofy smile. "Never better."

"You don't look so good," I think it was Isabella who said that.

Oh, yeah. Now I remembered. They both had long dark hair but Sophia had a pink strand and Isabella had a green one. God, I missed those angels. I was supposed to visit them today.

"Dad!" Sophia shouted over her shoulder. "Wilder's acting weird."

"Shhhh." I shut my mouth with my index finger. "No. Don't."

I tried to beg them not to tell Dad, but it was too late. The frame wiggled and then he appeared on my screen. I felt dizzy and all I could make out from his looks was his salt and pepper hair.

He took the phone from the girls, saying, "What did he do now?"

The girls shrugged before they disappeared from my view.

"Jesus Christ!" Dad recoiled slightly when he saw my face. "What happened, drama queen?" He grunted as he laid back in his chair. "Another lover dumped you?"

"Dad." Even though he insulted me, I couldn't help but wail, seeking comfort from him. "I fucked up."

"Shhh!" he whispered aggressively. "Keep your voice down."

Dad got up and passed Mom in the kitchen.

I heard her voice, "Is that my little nene?"

I heard Dad complaining, "Not now, Gabriela."

"Hi, Mom." I waved.

"Wait." She took the phone from Dad and gave me a kiss. "Te quiero mucho."

"I love you too, Mom."

Dad snatched the phone and continued to walk away.

"You're not supposed to say the F word around the girls." He entered a cozy room and locked the door behind him, then raised his voice, "And what the hell is wrong with you, huh? Are you drunk?"

I scoffed. "No."

"Boy, don't lie to me."

"I'm-I'm not."

OK. So, I was terrified of my dad. I loved him, but the man used to be a fucking drill sergeant in the military. He scared the crap out of me when I was a kid. Still, he had a good heart. He was a good father, always there for us, and loved us; even though he had a strange way of showing it.

"Your eyes and nose are red." He sighed and shook his head. "And there's an empty bottle of liquor right behind you."

I stared over my shoulder and saw it, then I faced Dad again.

"OK." I giggled and slightly rocked my head bashfully. "I might be a little tipsy."

"Whatever." He sighed. "So, what's this you said about fucking up?"

I went back to crying.

"Pull yourself together, boy! What did you do?"

"I did Tristen."

"Wait." He pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled. "I can't understand your drunken ass." He stared at me. "Say what, now?"

"I fucked Tris."

With that, I buried my face in my arm and wept. I screwed up big time, and I knew it. I needed someone to tell me that everything was going to be all right. My drunken brain totally forgot that the shit I just told my dad could very much be my last words.

Yup. Dad's gonna kill me.

But instead, he laughed, causing me to look up and wipe my tears.

"Wait, wait, wait a minute." He let out a few shaky chuckles and waved his hand. "No, no, no. You meant to say you fucked up. Y-you're trying to tell me that you fucked up." He gestured with his index finger from side to side to get the message right. "Because—" there was that wheezy laugh again "—it sounded like you said you fucked Tristen, but what you really wanted to say is that you fucked up."

He nervously started laughing. His eyes were glistening with tears, begging me to tell him that I didn't mean what I just said.

"No." I rolled my eyes. "I fucked him."

Seriously, I thought I was clear. I didn't slur or stutter. I fucked Tris. How hard could it be to understand that? How dumb Dad could be sometimes?

OK. I think I might have a death wish.

"You mean you fucked him up?" His laugh slowly faded and his smile was replaced with a frown. "Please, tell me that's what you meant."

"No, Dad." I groaned. "You're not listening. I fucked Tris as in I pulled his pants down and put my dick in—"

I set the phone up on a folded part of the bedsheet and started gesturing with my hands. That was the moment when Dad snapped.

"HOLY SHIT. STOP." He grimaced and instantly placed his hand on the screen. "Oh, boy." He gulped and I could hear him breathing loudly. "Jesus Christ." He removed the hand and ran it through his hair. "Damn it, boy!" His face was turning red as he screamed at me, "Goddamn you!"

I hugged my pillow and sunk my chin in it. I've never seen Dad this mad in my entire life. Not even when I accidentally crippled Fritzy, our pet dog. I dreaded the fact I was willingly telling him all this. What the hell was I thinking? Well, with the amount of alcohol in my system right now, I doubted I was thinking at all.

"Wait, wait. I think I might be missing a crucial piece of information here." Dad breathed to try to calm himself and then he asked, "Wilder. Were you two dating or something?"

I shook my head. "No."

Man, my head was killing me. I fought the urge to snooze while Dad was still talking.

"So, let me get this straight. You had sex with Tristen... without his consent?"

"Kinda."

"It's a yes or no question!"

At this point in our conversation, my dad was shaking. I was sure that if I wasn't seeing everything blurry right now, I would've seen swelling veins on his forehead.

"I don't know," I whined. "I'm not sure how it happened."

"Lemme rephrase my question." He slowly asked, "Did you or did you not rape your best friend?"

I buried my face in the pillow and cried, "I did."

I flinched when Dad hit a table, yelling, "Ah, hell!"

That was when Dad lost it and started yelling and cursing with every swear word in the world. I was surprised he remained calm this long. If this were a live TV show, you'd be hearing a lot of beeps right now. I winced at every curse. He was pointing at me, fuming and threatening.

"You make me sick! I'm gonna fucking kill you! You hear me?"

Now that he exploded, I knew I should have been peeing my pants, but I felt tired all of the sudden. I fought the urge to close my eyes and drift off. And the damn room didn't stop spinning.

"David." Mom opened the door to check on us. "Is everything all right?"

"Hey." I waved like an idiot.

She entered the room just as Dad was screaming, "You sick bastard!"

"Hey!" she warned, pointing a finger at him. "Don't you call our son that!"

"Oh. Oh-ho-ho, no," he stammered and rolled his eyes in a crazy and kinda scary way. "We're not gonna have a son anymore."

"What do you mean?" Mom asked.

"Because I'm gonna kill him!" Dad turned to face me with bulging eyes. "Do you hear me, Wilder? I'm coming to kill you!"

"Dad?" I whined.

"Why?" Mom looked really worried. "What did he do?"

I closed my eyes and listened to my parents arguing.

"Something wild and beyond stupid, just like the name you picked for him. Why, Gabriela? Why?" 

"Hey, don't you turn this on me. He got that wild attitude from you, you know?"

"Mom, Dad," I slurred. "Please, stop fighting."

"You shut your mouth! Honey," his voice softened when he talked to Mom. "Bring me the slimmest belt you can find." Then his voice turned dark again. "I'm coming, boy. You better not go anywhere." His tone was low and terrifying when he said, "I'm gonna make you wish you were never born." 

With that last threat, he hung up.

Shit. What did I get myself into?

I guess I subconsciously wanted to be punished for what I did.

I hope you laughed too at Wilder's drunk dialogues XD

But, damn. Wilder's dad looks super pissed! 😱

Oh, this is going to be painful. I can't watch 🙈

Do you think Wilder deserves whatever's coming to him?

NEXT CHAPTER: Preaching Dad  >