Michael went into the bathroom and cried. Yes, he may have lied about his first time, but he never lied when he said it was his first time making love to her.. It's complicated see? Michael's first time was an accident but he also didn't make love to her. When Michael got together with Suzanne, that was his first time making love. It was intentional. He planned to make love to her. Just.. Not exactly that night.  Michael wanted to wait until they were married but.. Let's face it, the time was right and he couldn't help it.

Michael cried until his head started to hurt. He started to hear a bunch of slamming doors which made the pain in his head worst. Michael covered his ears and closed his eyes. He wondered what was going on but at the same time, he didn't care. Michael started thinking about his mother. He wanted to be held by her so bad. He wanted to just reverse the time and be a boy again.. He remembered when her arms were the only comfort that he had. When she'd sing to him and his brothers and sisters. After a beating from Joseph, Michael would run to his mother.

Regardless of what Joseph said to him. Michael knew.. He knew that deep inside his heart, he was still only a child. A child who's married and trying to make things right for a change. Michael shook his head and sat there on the bathroom floor, thinking 'God.. When will this be all over? I want to get out of this storm!' He got up onto his feet after a few minutes and looked at himself in the mirror. He shook his head at his thoughts and wiped his face. Michael stepped out of the bathroom and started looking around for Suzanne. He went to the bedroom first.

Michael: Suzanne.. Are you in there?

She didn't answer him.. Michael tried to open the door but it was locked.

Michael: Come on Baby.. Open the door.

There still was no answer from her.

Michael: Don't make me pick this lock.

Somewhere in the house, Suzanne was thinking 'Go ahead. I don't give a rat's ass.' Michael stared down at his feet and listened in.. He heard not the slightest movement of anything in the room. Michael made the lock click and he stepped inside the room.

Michael: Suzanne?

Michael checked the whole room. The entire room and went wild after that. Michael went around the house unlocking doors and checking rooms. Michael leaned against a wall and slid down it after the whole house was searched..  Well, every place that he looked. A sound was made in his head.. Michael got up slowly and walked to a special door in the house.. The room was his special place.. He opened the door slowly and stood there. He closed the door behind himself and looked closely at the room. Michael had a strange urge and looked in two places.

He went to the bathroom and saw the mess. Michael looked back at the bed and approached it. He stood there and waited.. He didn't know what he was waiting for, but he waited for it. Then it happened. Michael looked down at the floor and began to crouch down. He got on his stomach and saw me..

-~-~-~-~-~Suzanne~-~-~-~-~-

Michael looked dead at me and crawled under the bed with me. I turned my head away from him and tried to scoot away from him but he got closer each time.

Suesie: Get away from me Michael!

Michael: Suzanne.. I don't want to fight right now or later. I don't want to fight anymore.

Suesie: Neither do I but I just want to be left alone..

Michael didn't listen to me and wrapped his arm around me.

Suesie: Stop. I said leave me alone.

Michael: No you didn't. You said that you wanted to be left alone.

Suesie: Well now I'm saying it. Leave me alone.

Michael: Not until you listen to me.

Suesie: What could you possibly have to say that's important to me right now?

Michael: I cried.

Suesie: You always do..

Michael: I cry because I Love You.

Suesie: Why? Why did you cry and why do you love me?

Michael: I cried because I made you cry.

Suesie: I didn't cry..

Michael: I know you did. Its in your voice.

Suesie: You know too much..

Michael: Not enough. I can't keep you from crying. That's my main thing. To keep you happy and from crying.

Suesie: You're not doing a very good job..

Michael: I know..

Michael chuckled lightly. Thank God he can't see my face.

Suesie: Leave.. Just leave me.

Michael: Not yet.

Suesie: Why not? I want you gone! Away from me! I want to be alone!

Michael: Because you and I both know that what you just said is a lie.

Suesie: Oh please..

Michael looked over at my face and lifted his eyebrows.

Michael: Then why haven't you moved my arm off of you?

I scoffed and rolled my eyes at him as I pushed his arm off.

Suesie: Because I knew that you'd only put it back. No use wasting my energy on you.

Michael: My arm is right here. I didn't move it back.

Suesie: Oh, you will.. I know you will..

Michael: If you say so. Do you want me to?

Michael grinned..

Suesie: No!

Michael did it anyway and I went wild.

Michael: There.

Suesie: Get your arms from being around me! I don't want you touching me!

Michael: Sue.. I can't..

Suesie: Why the hell not?

Michael: Well.. Since my arm is under you and the other is over you, I can't move.. Especially since we're under a bed..

Suesie: What do you mean, can't move?

Michael lightly chuckled.

Michael: Baby.. I'm stuck.

Suesie: Oh, what the fuck?

I screamed.

Michael: Stop it Sue! I'm tired of telling you!

Suesie: Then don't tell me! I'm sick of hearing your voice! We've been here for what feels like a hour and now we're stuck! Not only that but I'm stuck with you! YOU! I've been telling you to be quiet and leave me alone and not to touch me but you did it anyway! So do me a favor and shut up! Just shut up!

Michael got quiet for a while and then looked down.

Michael: I Love your voice.. It's so beautiful. Just as beautiful as your face. But nothing.. Nothing, compares to your heart. Your heart is beautiful but heavily guarded so that you won't be hurt again. But I promise you. I will not hurt you and I refuse to stop loving you.. No matter what.

I knew that he was sincere.. But I kept quiet for a while.

Suesie: I just want a family.. A family that loves me..

Michael: I am your family! I Love You and I will never leave you! Never baby..

Michael grabbed my hand with his wedding hand. Our rings laid beside each other as our hands went into a lock.

Suesie: Til death do us part.

Michael: I wish you could turn around right now. But.. You are are always in my heart. No matter how much we fight or disagree, I will always love you more.

Suesie: Michael.. I just want.. I want to be loved. Not in the way you show me, but loved. Parents, babies, siblings and friends. I want that so bad, but I've never had it. Now that I do, I don't know what to do with it.. I'm afraid that I'll mess up and end up being alone again. I'm afraid of losing everybody.. And you too.. I Love You.. So much. I may not act like it, but I do. I really do..

I started crying again at a certain point. Michael kissed my shoulder and held my hand tighter.

Michael: Baby, you are loved. Very loved. That's what a family is, if one messes up, we all go down or we have a good laugh or we help them. We love you.. Baby, I Love You. More than life.

Suesie: And I love you more than myself. I love you more than life and air and water and everything I can think of.

Michael: I wish I could hold you.

Then it got quiet. I started pushing my feet against the wall, which made the bed and everything under it, move. I couldn't stay under that bed any longer. I grabbed the edge of the bed and started to pull on it as my feet pushed on the wall to keep the bed from moving back in place. I got out of Michael's grip and stood up. I crawled over the bed and lift the bed so the Michael could get out.

Suesie: Thank God.. Now, I'm going out of this room so don't follow me.

Michael put his hands up in defence and smiled at me.

Michael: You save us and now I can crack my back, so I'm grateful.

Suesie: Good.

I started walking out and then Michael held up a finger.

Michael: Just one thing.

Suesie: What now?

I groaned.

Michael: Just, let me hold you.. Just for a little while..

Suesie: No.

Michael: Please?

Suesie: No.

Michael: Please?

Suesie: Michael..

Michael started singing..

Michael: I wanna touch you babe!

I crossed my arms.

Michael: Let me touch you girl!

Suesie: Michael, stop it!

Michael: All over, all over, all over, all over, all over, all over, all over babe!

Suesie: Oh my gosh..

I faked my annoyance.. His voice was getting to me. He got closer to me and before I knew it, he was right in front of me.

Michael: Lay back with me!

Suesie: Mike.. No..

Michael: You're my Lady.. All through the night..

Suesie: If I let you hold me, will you shut up?

Michael: Oh girl, let me give you all.. I wanna give you all.. You are the Lady in my life. You're my Lady..

Suesie: Okay, okay! Alright! If you promise to be quiet, you can hold me.

Michael didn't waste any time to wrap me in his arms again and keep me in a tight grip. Michael started walking and sat down. Then he laid down.. Every time he did something, I did the same thing.. But it was not my choice to do as he did. Michael held me close and fell asleep after a while. I thought about he whole situation.. The baby, Lisa, Michael, me and the baby I want. My own flesh and blood. I want a baby, but I guess it won't happen.. Okay, now I'm hungry..