I went together night feeling horrible.. I couldn't function correctly. The fact that I actually had sex with another man is too much to bare. I feel like a prostitute.. Like I'm worthless. But I see no other way out unless Michael comes back. I learned how to stand when I shoot a gun and how take the child lock off when I was out there with him. I'm so glad I learned how.. Now I can shoot him up tomorrow without killing him.. Instantly. That night though.. Something weird happened.

I started to cry in a corner and then Chris told me to come to him. I was lead to a room. It only had one light and a table.. A Metal table.. Like my dream.. He strapped me to it and looked at me. I was afraid but I tried not to show it.

Suesie: What are you doing?

Chris: What I should've done a long time ago.

He disappeared and then came back with a blade.. The blade shone through the darkness and scared me. My dream was coming true. Michael where are you?

Suesie: Why are you doing this?

Chris: Teasing, calling me a virgin, pretending to like me for a day.. Oh and plotting to kill me. I know you.. You're not slick. So, that all earns you five painful marks.. Bite on this, it'll make you feel better.

Suesie: Chris, stop it! Please! I swear! I'm not trying to kill you!

Chris: Liar! That makes seven marks!

He shoved the towel in my mouth and started cutting. He made each mark long and painful. I felt the blood drizzle down my body and onto the metal table.. I was so scared. Michael couldn't put a pep in his step by a little bit, could he? I was untied after he tried to have sex with me and then he forced me to walk back to my room. It was torture.. The blood running down my legs, the blade that pierced my skin, the rape and how I was forced to walk.. Walk! This bitch crazy..

Chris: Goodnight sweetheart.

He said before he closed my door.

Suesie: Michael, please come back to me.

He popped his head back in there with a grin.

Chris: By the way.. An old friend of ours wants to see you.

He threw him in there and I started stammering as I cried.

Suesie: J-J-Jomo!

My plan was foiled and I was helpless while Michael was trying everything to get me back. He went a gun store and bought a gun with bullets.

Michael: Thank you.

He said before leaving and running back to his car. He rushed to the spot where Lisa had crashed her car and went from there. He followed his memory and ended up at the place again. He hid his gun and sneaked inside the building. Need I say, what Michael is doing now happened the night after I was raped by Jomo again. Anyway.. Michael approached the room where I was on a metal table again. Chris had approached me and was about to strip me so he could rape me. Michael came quietly and as soon as he pulled his gun out, another gun was put to the back of his head.

Suesie: Michael!

Chris: Shut up! Nice to see you again. Jomo, put that gun away. I want to play a game.

Michael: Let her go.

Chris: Exactly the game name! That's exactly the name of the game!

Michael looked at him carefully and then back at Jomo.

Chris: You have to look at the person you want to shoot and then remember where they stood while focusing on their movements.

Michael: Alright.. And if I don't play?

Chris: Play or die.

Michael: Seems easy to me.

Chris: Oh really? Let's see how good you are..

The lights went out.

Chris: In the dark.

Michael tried to focus on where his voice was but it was everywhere. I had tape over my mouth, so I couldn't scream. It came out muffled and when Chris got a hold of me, he held a blade to my throat for me to shut up. I started to cry silently. I looked at Michael with pleading eyes. I heard gun shot and then the lights came on.. Michael looked at who was still standing. Me nor Chris were standing.. Michael picked me up and tried to rush me out of there.

Jomo stopped him and so Michael fought him and ended up getting hurt. He shot Jomo after Jomo stabbed him on his side. It wasn't a deep cut, so Michael lived. He picked me up and carried me to the car. He rushed me to the hospital as he kept saying that he was sorry. Sorry for what? You did me a favor. Lights flashed and pretty soon.. I was standing over my own body. Michael went and brought Leona to see me. I was pale and she began to cry.

Michael: Go say goodbye to mommy.

Leona: Goodbye? Why?

Michael: You won't see her for a while..

Leona: Why?

Michael: Leona.. Mommy died..

Leona: Oh.. When will she be back?

She didn't understand.. She may be seven, but she's never been to her first funeral.. That she remembers at least..

Michael: In a few days or weeks.

Leona: And then she's staying home, right?

Michael shook his head and looked at me as he began to cry.

Leona: Daddy?

Michael: No baby.. Mommy's gone.. Forever..

She didn't know how long forever was..

Leona: Mommy looks like she sleep. Is Mommy sleep?

Michael: Yes..

Leona: Will she wake up?

Michael: No baby.

Leona: Why did Mommy die?

Michael looked at my body and started to cry harder once he grabbed a hold of my hand. My cold dead hand..

Michael: I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry.. I never meant to hurt you..

Hurt me? Baby you helped me.. I thought as I stood over him. Michael went away with Leona but I think she saw something because she waved.

Leona: Bye Mommy.

Suesie: Goodbye baby..

A light flashed and I saw the funeral.. My body in there and everyone wearing black. I looked at Michael and I tried to wipe away his tears. He looked so handsome in black but he looked so sad without me. He went up to the stand and began to talk about me.

Michael: Suzanne was a beautiful woman. She was not just my wife, she was my everything.. Actually.. I shouldn't say was because she still is. She is my first love, the mother of our first child and the strongest woman I've ever met besides my mother. She was a free spirit once you got past all the deep and dark parts of her heart. By deep and dark, I mean the flashbacks of her past and her insecurities.

Michael looked down at my body.

Michael: She is still the most beautiful women I had ever seen. I will cherish her in my heart forever and I'll never forget her. All she ever wanted to do was please others when she was the one who needed pleasing.. She was going to give me another child but unfortunately, that child never got to see the light of day. But I thank God that I got to have at least one child. Our beautiful daughter and our only child.. Leona Aaliyah Jackson. And just because she's gone in the body does not mean that she's actually gone.. She's still here.. In here.. In each and every one of our hearts. If she were alive today, I'd tell her how much I love her and protect her like there was no tomorrow for us if I let her out of my sight for event a minute.

He wiped his eyes and looked down at my body once more..

Michael: I Love You Suzanne.. Til death do us part.

He got down and went to look at me one more time. His hand caressed my cheek and then he kissed my lips.

Michael: I'm not the same without you.

He whispered to me before he went to sit down. The funeral dismissed and then the burial is where all hell broke lose. Jomo had the nerve to show up and Michael started acting wild.

Jomo: Sweet Suzanne.. I'm sorry.

Michael: What are you doing here?

Jomo: Paying my respects to my cousin.

Michael: You're the reason she's dead!

Jomo: You had the gun, not me if I recall correctly.

Michael lost it and punched him in the face. They began to wrestle.

Michael: You fucking fool! You helped kill my wife! If you never would've raped her, she'd still be alive!

Jomo flipped Michael and started to choke him.

Jomo: No bitch! If you never would've shot her, she'd still be alive!

Jomo got off of Michael and dusted himself off.

Michael: Go to hell!

Jomo: So I can join Suzanne? Hell no. I'll pass.

Michael tackled him again. He let all of his anger go at that moment.

Michael: You killed my wife! You ruined her! You helped with everything!

Jomo: You weak little pig! I did nothing but get what I wanted!

Michael: You raped her! I should kill you!

Jomo: Why? So I can be with her? My pleasure.

Michael: Bitch!

They kept fighting and Leona was snatched up by LaToya. She didn't want Leona exposed to this. Michael wouldn't stop until he got it all out of him. He kept punching Jomo and then when he'd get in a great spot, he'd begin to choke him. The fight ended with Michael on the ground crying over me and I was so upset. I felt myself starting to shake really bad and then everything went black..

So..

That's my story..

I lived, I loved and I died.

But has it ever crossed you mind?

The title?

This story really isn't that confusing.

You just have to focus on what the main focus is..

And by the way..

Has it ever covered to you how I'm able to talk and tell my story while I'm dead?

Just pretend that I'm smiling at you and then I begin to laugh right here..