Why? Because I'm too lazy to make a whole zodiac book.

***Please don't yell at me, I just made these up so don't be surprised if they aren't accurate.

STUFF THE SIGNS WOULD SAY

Aries - "Watch as I majestically walk away from my responsibilities."

Taurus - "I wonder what this plant tastes like..."

Gemini - "Oh, sorry Paula Deen."

Cancer - "Is this dangerous? Because I'm going to assume this is dangerous."

Leo - Says nothing, instead sticks leg out on a nearby table with fierce determination.

Virgo - "Never fear, for I have my trusty wrench!"

Libra - "Please don't let your child bite me thank you."

Scorpio - "Okay but like, that cat looks really suspicious."

Sagittarius - "I'm on fire right now, but I guess that's okay."

Capricorn - "Do you think I could lick this without dying?"

Aquarius - "This is the dawning of the angel Aquarius!!"

Pisces - "Just heely away from your feelys"