Ethan

"Ethan, what's your grandfather's name?" Sophie asked once we stepped inside the hospital and out of that streaming rain.

"James, James Anderson" I said.

"Give me a minute let me check at the desk." Her voice drifted farther as the soft taps of here steps distanced.

Skye pulled me to the side and out of the way. I leaned on the cold wall behind me. My thoughts were distracted by my surroundings. The strong smell of cleaning supplies filled the air made my nose itch. Numerous footsteps coming and going in all directions. People were talking, coughing and sneezing. Someone's baby was crying somewhere to my left. A screeching sound of what seemed like a rusted wheel that squeaked its way right in front of us. There was a ruffle of flickering light followed by a hum and low buzz over my head.

I hated crowded unfamiliar places. It made me restless in many different ways.

As if sensing my dilemma, Skye touched her shoulder to mine and the back of her hand brushed against mine. My head whipped her direction and I smiled. She was silently telling me that she was there for me.

"Hey Sophie, I thought you had the early shift today!" Someone said catching my attention.

"I did, I'm here to check on a friend" Sophie said.

I leaned close to Skye asking, "Your Aunt works at the hospital?"

She leaned in too, "Yes, she a nurse here."

And I went back to listening. There were medical terms that I didn't understand thrown here and there. I could hear my grandfather's name being mention and then it was switched to ′the patient'. That felt weird how a person's name to be stripped into just 'the patient'.

I didn't need to understand all those terms they were talking of to know things didn't look up. Sophie's soft taps had me pushing off the wall and in full attention.

"He's in ICU right now on the 3rd floor," she informed us, "Doctor McCartney is with him right now. He is one of the best cardiac doctors here at the hospital so I believe he'll be in good hands."

"Thank you!" I said in gratitude.

She touched my arm in sympathy, "It was nothing," and then she was talking to Skye, "Sweetie, a word please."

I could hear their steps stopping a few feet away, however, I was able make out some of the low spoken words. I think I heard Sophie ask, "Are you sure you can do this?"

I didn't mean to eavesdrop but I strained to hear Skye's answer. What are they talking about? Was there something happening with Skye? What was I missing?

"I'm sure he'll be alright." a small voice said from my side interrupting my eavesdropping.

Matt.

This kid was too quiet for his age that I almost forgot he was here.

I turned to Matt, "I hope he will."

A moment later Skye was back to my side and her hand was in mine.

Sophie asked, "Do you need anything, would you want me to stay?"

I shook my head, "You did a lot already." Then I gave Skye's hand a little squeeze before starting to slip mine from hers so she could leave too, "Thank you for everything", I told her.

Skye laced her fingers back through mine and simply stated, "I'm not going anywhere."

I shook my head again, "I can't ask you to do that, Skye."

I could feel her body close to mine, "Not a chance, I'm staying."

I couldn't argue further. At this point I knew there will be no changing her mind. And to tell the truth, I didn't want her to. I sank my fingers deeper between hers in a tight appreciative grip.

"Call me if you need anything," Sophie said, "I'll stop by in the morning before my shift starts."

"Here, I grabbed your phone charger so your phone won't die." Matt said.

"Thank you buddy. You're the best." Skye said.

I've witnessed many brother-sister relationships and those two were the most caring siblings I've ever met.

Skye led the way as we walked through the hospital's corridors. The silence between us made me think of Sophie's question. Searching for any clue of what Sophie might've meant. Anything out of the usual with Skye. Her voice, her touch. The way she spoke. Nothing.

So I asked, "Skye..."

"Hmm..." she was murmuring the hospital signs as we walked.

"What did Sophie mean when she asked, are you sure you can do this?" I didn't bother to apologize for over-listening or if this was personal.

"What? Oh," I caught her off guard and she laughed. "Elevator," she informed as she got us inside.

The floor underneath my feet change to something lighter. Then a strange female mono-tune voice announced, "First floor" before we started to move.

Skye's voice pitched a tad higher answering my hanging question, "Nothing..."

Her voice did that when she hid something or when she was mad. And that slight difference in her laugh didn't pass me. I made it clear that I wasn't convinced and waited for further explanation.

She added, "Oh well, you know... needles and I don't get along very well. Hospitals are where all the evil needles live."

I knew her too well by now. I didn't believe that half-truth half-funny story she just sprouted. Her hand shook a little in mine and I could hear her taking a deep breath. I wanted to ask more when the female voice announced, "Third floor."

"Wheelchair" Skye said as she stepped outside the elevator pulling me with her out of the way. A low squeak and rolling wheels past us.

"Ethan?" I heard my father's voice calling my name. His surprise was unmistakable, "What... what are you doing here? How did you get here?"

I stepped in the direction of his words. Skye by my side making sure I wouldn't walk into anything.

"How's Gramps?" I asked right away.

Sadness weighed his words, "He's not stable yet. So far things don't look..." he stopped abruptly then started again his voice broke a little, "The doctors are running some tests."

My chest tightened as I understood the hidden message in those words.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm George. Ethan's father." Dad suddenly said.

Where are my manners?

I didn't introduce them to one another. It was not that I ignored her, I could never do that. I just came to the belief that she was the extension of my being. If anyone knew me then they definitely knew her. There were no Skye and I by my scale, there was Skye-I.

"I'm sorry. Dad, this is Skye." I did the belated introduction. She gave my hand a little squeeze before letting go. Probably to shake dad's hand.

"Hello, sir." She said in her sweet politeness. "I go to the same school as Ethan." Then she apologized for Gramps being in the hospital and the circumstances.

I wanted her hand back in mine. Closing my fingers over an empty space didn't feel right. This vacant space bothered me, until moment later her fingers settled between mine again.

"Is it okay if I stayed?" she asked my father.

My breath got trapped as I waited for dad's response and my fingers clutched tighter around hers. I think dad saw that because he made that 'um' sound.

"Of course, if that's fine with your parents."

Her hand flinched in mine and I tilted my head in her direction

"They won't mind," she said after a moment.

Our fingers were still laced even after we have seated and to my advantage she didn't seem to mind. I might not be able to see her, but this was close to seeing her. Not enough, but close.

I didn't need her help getting from one place to another that much, I've been getting around just fine by myself and I've adjusted to that. However, I was shameless to admitting that I needed her. She was becoming my sense of reason. And the tight grasp that closed over my hand got me at my weakest point and most grateful.

The echo of high heels clicking on the tile floor were becoming louder. A walk I recognized and knew well. I was up on my feet.

"Mum" I called.

The clicks came to an abrupt stop. There was a gasp followed by a sigh.

"Oh Ethan..." her voice quivered as she rushed to me, "I'm so glad that you came..." and then she wrapped her arms around me in a hug.

For the first time in two years I hugged mum back.

Skye

If I could take away his pain, I would.

If I could spare him the heartache and sadness I won't hesitate.

And if I could free him from all the grief I would have done it in a heartbeat.

But I couldn't. I was as helpless and defeated as he was. All I could do was to be there when he needed. Good or bad I was going to be there. I prayed for good.

I tried to step aside so Ethan and his mum would have some space, but I couldn't get out of the way fast enough.

"Any news?" Ethan asked.

His mother's eyes flooded and her lips quivered, "Nothing yet, we're still waiting," she wiped her eyes, "They are trying to stabilize his condition."

Her eyes rounded a little when Ethan said, "Everything will be fine, mum."

She glanced at the ceiling like there was a gush of overwhelming happiness engulfed her. Experiencing firsthand the countless times that Ethan tried to push me away along with everyone, I took by his parent's reaction they belonged to that group too.

His mother then looked at me. Despite the heart wrenching expression on her face and the tears in her beautiful green eyes she gave me a little smile, "Skye?" she asked as to confirm if she had the right person.

I swallowed my surprise and nodded in confirmation. Even though this was the first time she saw me, she had me pulled in a hug that startled me. It was the warm and loving kind that reminded me of mum's hugs. She used to hug me just like that. Tears burnt my eyes and throat, I blinked them away quickly.

She leaned back but held me by the arms. The look on her face was confusing. Gratitude, likeness, appreciation and others I couldn't read.

Even through the sadness that clouded her soft beautiful features, her smile was genuine, "I'm Clair." Then she gave a nervous laugh, "I'm sorry, I must look a mess!" She quickly dabbed her tears with a handkerchief she was holding.

Then her delicate fingers brushed some stray light brown strands away from her face and placed them back with the rest in a bun, and the diamond in her wedding ring reflected the light as she did. She pulled down at the hem of her dark blue designed jacket over a creamy blouse and fixed her matching skirt. She looked like a high class business woman, with the small purse and high heels pumps. She was beautiful and looked small standing next to Ethan.

Ethan's father, George, wasn't bad looking at all either. On the contrary. He was tall, broad shouldered just like Ethan. They had the same strong jawline and the same dark hair color. The resemblance was as clear as the daylight. Even though I didn't see the rest of Ethan's features but those were some handsome people.

I shook my head in a not-at-all manner until I was able to find my voice.

Clair looked back at me and apologized again, "I'm sorry to meet you in such circumstances."

"No... no, I apologize for intruding. I hope it's okay if I stayed?" I had to ask her permission too. It was a family matter after all.

Clair's eyes glanced quickly at Ethan and then back at me with a smile, "Not at all, sweetheart."

Clair stepped away to talk to George while Ethan and I returned to our seats. Ethan's leg move in an up and down in short motion shake and he fidgeted in his seat.

After a moment of silence, I asked, "Since the doctor allowed short visits, why don't you go talk to him?" I kept a careful eye on him to catch every expression and to know when to stop talking.

Ethan was confused for a second, but then his features dimmed like someone stole the light from his face and were replaced it with anguish that crushed my heart, "What's the use if he won't talk back to me?"

I touched his arm comforting, "Even though, go talk to him. Just talk. About anything. I'm sure he'd be listening."

Ethan didn't see the point in doing that. He didn't want to be in the way, but nodded in agreement anyway. When he asked me to take him my chest tightened painfully. I couldn't bring myself into doing that. The memory of my mum when she was on the hospital's bed after the accident with tubes sticking out her mouth nose and arms and loud machines making rabid beeping, before it turned into that one single long beep.

I was starting to panic and my breath was heaving in my chest. To my rescue, Hank arrived that moment.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"I want to sit with Gramps for a while" Ethan told him.

Then Hank looked at me. I tried to keep it up with the poker face, but he frowned a little then suggested, "I'll take Ethan. You have a seat; I want to check on him too."

Ethan hesitated for a second before letting go of my hand. As I walked back to my chair I took a glance at my reflection on one of the tinted windows. Nothing but a pale face and wide eyes stared back at me surrounded by the darkness of the night.

George came with coffee for all of us. He handed me one with a smile and I took it gratefully.

He tried to convince Clair to go home and rest for a couple of hours but she refused. Hank came out a few minutes later, while Ethan stayed with his grandfather. They were talking medicine, surgery, doctors and insurance, so I kept quiet fiddling with my sleeves and sipping my coffee. Hank would go to check on Ethan every few minutes.

Later, George went to get an update from the doctor while Clair changed her seat to the one beside me. I gave her a quick, awkward smile then lowered my eyes nervously. There was a weird stretching silence between.

When I finally built the guts to lift my head I was surprised that she was looking at me with a pleased expression. She smiled at me and I smile back. I raked my brain for something to say and came out with zilch.

"Thank you, Skye!" Clair said as she enveloped my hand in hers.

My voice came out weird and puzzled, "For what?"

She took a deep breath, "For everything you did... for ..." Her voice quivered and chocked, eyes filling with unshed tears, "Just thank you for being there for Ethan."

Clair wanted to say more when her glance averted to a point behind me.

"Skye?" Ethan called in a gruff voice making me spin around. He sounded like he wasn't sure if I would still be there.

His hand reached out and I was by his side right away. His fingers were cold. He looked more numb than he was earlier.

"Dr. McCartney wants to see us." Hank motioned to Clair.

Clair stood quickly, but before she followed him, she stopped in front of me for a second. She touched my cheek with a smile on her face.

Hank was about to catch up with his sister when Ethan stopped him, "Let me know what he says."

Hank promised and rushed off. I guided him to a seat and I took the one next to him. Ethan fingers clutched mine tightly. I looked long at the side of his face, pale, jaw locked tight and lips pressed.

"Are you Okay?" I asked rubbing his hand with mine trying to warm it up. He was falling in an in-haze moment, deep in thoughts. "Ethan..." I called out his name.

His head barley moved. I put my hand in his cheek and I could feel him freeze for a minute like he was about to push me away and pull up that strong, careless front that he always had.

I prepared myself to be shut out, but then he pressed his cheek to my palm. His skin was warm, smooth and soft against mine. His breathing rhythm change from shallow and short to deep and steady. Feeling his breath on my wrist had my pulse go crazy. I bet my face was turning a different shade right now.

I was about to pull away when he cupped my hand with his and held it pressed to his cheek. If he didn't notice my pulse before, then he definitely would now.

"Stay..." he whispered, "Just a moment longer."

The exhaustion in his voice pinned me. Having him resting to my palm was a silent talk. A silent share of how emotionally spent he was right now. After visiting his grandfather Ethan sounded like he talked a lot.

For Ethan, he needed responses and knowing that he wasn't going to get anything from talking to his Gramps must have been hard for him. This was him, in his weakest and it broke me.

I gently moved my thumb back-and-forth brushing against the hard bone of his cheek, "You okay?" I asked him again.

He finally nodded. Then pressed his cheek to my palm one last time before letting go.

Ethan cleared his throat, "What time is it?" he asked.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket, "After midnight."

Ethan flinched then stood up, "I'm really sorry for keeping you up so late. I'll ask Hank to drive you home."

I stopped him before he could make a move, "This is nonnegotiable. I told you I'm staying."

He turned and faced me. A weird feeling that he was looking at me struck me hard making my heart jump.

"I feel guilty for keeping you in a hospital on a weekend."

"Well, Hank might just have to roll me to the car because I'm not going anywhere." My loony side was taking over as I pulled him to his seat again, "Plus who will bicker with Your Awfulness but yours truly".

Apparently my craziness paid off. Ethan relaxed and even smiled a tiny bit. He shook his head and leaned his back to his chair and so did I. We were silent for a moment.

His head tilted my way and he said, "Thank you, Skye", his voice carried the weight of the words. Heavy and meaningful, "Thank you for...."

I interrupted him, "That's what friends do." I didn't know how, but my head was resting on his shoulder, "You can always count on me," I promised.

Ethan

My heart quivered when her head touched my shoulder and stayed there. It wasn't like the usual pulling on my sleeves when she needed me focus. Or touching my arm when she was sympathizing. This wasn't a brush of a shoulder or a knee. This was different. An easily-addicted-to kind of different just like at her house a few hours ago. I thought it was going to be a one-time thing, but it was happening again.

The sweet smell of her shampoo mixed with that perfume she always wore filled my lungs as I breathed in deeply. Despite everything that was happening I relaxed. My worries about Gramps subsided for a minute to be replaced with the hopes that he'll be fine. Especially after walking into that room and hearing all those machines, all that had the situation falling down on me like a boulder.

Skye's thumb moved side to side over mine sending pulses right to my spine. Usually, she only held my hand just when we moved from one place to another and to be honest, a hint of sadness seeps through me when we reach our distention and she let go. But tonight, she didn't let go of me and neither did I.

The guilty feeling of keeping her here on a weekend was selfishly demolished under the abandonment when she left to grab a cup of coffee or something hot. But then it sprouted back again when I noticed how cold her fingers were and felt her body shiver.

I pulled off the hoodie I was wearing and gave up my stupid selfishness and asked for the hundredth time, "Put this on, and let Hank take you home, please." I even begged this time.

The hoodie slipped out of my fingers as she took it, "Thank you for the hoodie, but I'm not leaving until Gramps is fine, that's final, and stop trying to get rid of me."

Hearing her saying Gramps made me smile. "You're are too stubborn do you know that," I said.

She sighed dramatically, "Oh well, tough luck! That's what you got stuck with."

There was nothing I would like more. Stubbornness and all.

Doctor McCartney has been updating us by the hour. Gramps condition was still critical and all we could do was wait. I made a silent promise to myself, if Gramps pulled through this that I would start to make amends. Not only towards him, but with everyone I kept at distant.

I have been completely self-absorbed ever since the accident and everything that followed that I've stopped noticing how hard things were for others. There were many nights were my mind would play all the stupid, selfish things I did and it would keep me awake for hours. My actions toward the people around me were bitter, hurtful and harsh, that was the layout of every word I've spoken and everything I've did. Many of which I regret and would try my best to set right.

Just pull through, Gramps. Just pull through.

At some point during the night I found myself eating a sandwich and drinking orange and carrots juice. Skye brought food and drinks for everyone. She kept my mind busy with her ways of saying witty stuff or telling funny stories.

I think my parents were listening in because I could hear mom's low snickers at the same time dad would clear his throat. If I could glare at them to butt out I would have.

As time passed I noticed the light slur in Skye's speech and the coldness that invaded her limbs from the lack of sleep. She stifled her yawns the best she could. It must be morning by now, the chirps of early birds gave it away and the rain has stopped.

"Doctor!" Skye told me.

I stood up right on queue with my heart sinking in my chest. I eased my grip on Skye's slender fingers the moment I realized how tight I was gripping her, "I'm sorry"

We walked towards their voices; my ears perked trying to catch every word that has been said. All I heard was the tremor of my mother's voice and Dr. McCartney telling them, "For now we will keep him in the ICU under observation."

My parents were praising him with great gratitude. Mum's voice was closer to tears and Hanks voice shook a little. The relief in their voices was unmistakable and the soft cheers and joyful laughs gave away the good news, but I still wanted to hear the actual words.

"Ethan..." mum called half-laughing half-crying. She hugged me tight and her voice broke in tears, "He's going to be fine!"

Someone clasped my shoulder firmly, "Gramps is going to be fine." Dad repeated mum's words. The tension that was in his voice was no longer there.

Then there was an attack on my hair messing it up in every direction. Who else but Hank would do that to me?

Mum slipped away and I heard her voice say in content, "Thank you for being here with us." And then she made that low humming sound she always made when she hugged someone. It was Skye. And just for that I adored my mum even more.

"Let's go see Dr. McCartney for the surgery and treatment plan." Hank announced.

Mum touch my arm so I would know that she was speaking to me "We'll be back in a while."

I nodded. Their footsteps faded as they walked down the corridor. Everyone was talking and laughing now.

But... I couldn't.

I couldn't fall out of stress and into the relieved mood like everyone else. I tried, but I couldn't relax, smile or even think. For a very long time things haven't been working the way I wanted them to. I was used to the disappointment and I was afraid that this time wouldn't be any different.

I tried to pin out where Skye stood but the girl was as quiet as a mouse. "Marco", I said a little louder than I tended to.

She giggled, "Polo". She wasn't far at all.

Two arms sneaked around my waist and a small body pressed to my side. My heart clattered and my lungs stopped in the middle of whatever they were doing. I wasn't sure if it was an inhale or an exhale. Warmth spread through my body like rays of sunshine and every nerve came back to life.

The smile could be heard in the sweetness of her voice, "I am glad Gramps is going to be fine."

My voice came out gruff, "Me too."

And just like that the relief washed in, calming my existence.

My arms wrapped around her small shoulders. Her hair was incredibly soft to the touch. I rested my chin on the crown of her head enjoying the feather soft tickles on my chin and neck. This was the first time I touched her hair, the first time I hugged her and the first time we got this close.

At that exact moment I discovered, I never wanted it to end.