ITS LITERALLY 12:54 AM WHY AM I  WRITING THIS!? Also this chapter is... ehehh kind of a smut. I hate writing these. I'm not good at them. GOODBYE

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*SLAM!*

Tom sat up in bed, awoken by the sudden sound. He swung his feet over the bed and glanced at his clock: 3:16 AM. Hushed voices came from the living room, so Tom grabbed his harpoon and tiptoed out of his room. He glanced around the corner, seeing three dark figures. One of their voices was familiar: Tord.

The only words Tom could make out were: "Sir... okay, but... yes they did... thank you, Red Leader... alright.." The two figures turned and left.

When they were gone, Tom dropped his harpoon and glared at Tord.

"What are you doing at this time in the morning!?"

"Nothing you should know about."

"Actually, I should. Are you 'Red Leader'?"

"How about you figure that out?"

"Who were they?"

Tord suddenly pulled out a gun and put it against Tom's temple. "Too many questions, sweetie~" He chuckled.

"Wh-..." the Brit started to sweat nervously. "G-Get that gun off me, norski!"

"First let me have a little fun," he smirked, leading him to the couch. "Lay down."

"Hell no!"

"Lay. Down."

"...Fine.." Tom hesitantly laid down, scared for his life. Tord pinned him against the couch, leaving the gun on the table. He seductively licked the Jehovah Witnesses neck, earning a slight moan. "W-Wait, where's Matt and Edd?" Tom asked quietly.

"They sleep like logs, and you know that."

Tord left love bites all over Tom's body, ripping his shirt off. They messily kissed each other while moaning in between.

"F-F***, I can't believe I'm letting you d-do this," Tom huffed.

"Do what, Tom?" Tord grinned.

"Don't make me talk dirty," he snarled, blushing a deep red.

"Alright, I guess i'll sto--" the norski began.

"Oh, geez, I-I want you to f*** me with your commie d***! I want you to hear me moan your name and scream t-to the world how good you feel!"

"Not bad." Tord chuckled and traced kisses down his body until he reached above his pants. "It looks like your clothes are in the way~ What a shame.."

Tom, now blushing even deeper and sweating, unzipped his pants and pulled them down. "You do it too!"

"Anything for you, but let's take this to my room." Tord smirked. He carried Tom bridal style and went to his room, setting him on the bed.  "Where were we~? Oh, yes." He took off his pants seductively, keeping eye contact with his lover. Tord grinded against Tom, and they both moaned loudly.

They both slid off their boxers, revealing their (im dead inside please help what am I even doing anymore i hope my mom doesn't find this) b*ners.

"G-Guess what," Tom managed to say. "I hhh...~ Ha-Have no gag reflex.."

The other smiled smugly.

He licked Tord's tip, moans filling the room. His d*** hit the back of Tom's throat and he groaned, sweating harder.

"Haahhhh~ Th-This is... amaz-zing... Hnng~ Ohhhh...D-Damn, Jeh-Jehovah's Witness..." Tord moaned, pulling Toms's hair. "F-F***~! Y-You--ngh~! Aghhh...~ I-I-I.. I'm g-...~ Gonna c-cum...~! Hhh... Ohhh! H-Have you d-done th--hhh--this before~? I'm--I'm gonna cum~!!"

Tom felt warm liquid shoot down his throat. He pulled away, the sticky white liquid dribbling down his chin. "How come YOU get all the fun?" He pinned the commie down and shoved his d*** in his mouth.

Tord gasped, but made sure to pleasure the Brit. After three or four minutes he came into his mouth. Tom groaned, eyes shut and teeth clenched. He pulled himself out of his mouth and laughed quietly.

"Wh-What's so funny?"

"I never thought I'd be doing this with you."

"Heh, same here."

They began to make out again, more heated than before. Tom cuddled up against Tord's chest, dead tired. He pulled the blankets over them and fell alseep.

---Next Morning---

Tom woke up to small, cute noises. He felt his lover twitching in his sleep. He chuckled quietly, stood up, and kissed Tord's forehead. Tom threw on some pants--still shirtless-- and went out to the kitchen. Edd was grabbing a can of cola but then turned to look at him.

"You guys were pretty loud last night~" he smirked. Tom stared at him with an annoyed expression. Once Edd saw his hickeys he blushed. "Wh-What the hell!?"

"What?" He shrugged and grabbed a bottle of Smirnoff, chugging it down. "It's not like you and Matt haven't done anything before."

"SHUT UP!" Edd yelled.

Tom rubbed his eyes and stretched. "I'm so tired."

"Well maybe if you slept last night.."

"I didn't wanna disappoint Tord~"

Tom felt arms snake around his waist. "Trust me, you didn't," a Norwegian voice said.

He seemed to roll his eyes. "Go away norski. Im gonna go get drunk."