Third POV eye

"Why didn't she apologize instead of staring at me like that, huh ??? !!!!" exclaims Maria. Aaron thinks, but finds nothing.

"I don't know....Maybe....that....No I don't know. Charlie, do you have an idea?" Aaron looks at him and shakes his head.

"Alexander, you went out with Eliza, didn't you?" Asks Aaron. Alexander nods.

"You could know why she did that," Aaron asks. Alexander spent a short time with her. He finally shakes his head.

"What I don't understand is why she told you she can not apologize. Do you want me to go talk to him? " He asks Maria.

"I do not know if it will be useful," She says. Finally, she shakes her head.

The bell rings. Aaron looks at her and holds his hand.

"Don't hink about it too much, okay." Aaron says that because he knows Maria's behavior. She smiles at him and nods.

"Aaron !!!" He turns around and sees Charles holding his other hand.

"You like my hand to what I see," Aaron laughs. Charles blushes.

"Stop!" Charles says.

"Ok, ok," Aaron says, trying to stop his laughter. Alexander feels a little out of the way. Does Aaron think of him? Has Aaron just realized that he is right behind him? Alexander asks himself a lot of questions.

He decides to think about it afterwards and to go to school.

*After school*

Alex went to Aaron so he could go back together.

Alex holds his hand. He leaves for the way back.

"Aaron?" He does not look at Alexander.

"Yes?"

"Do you like Charles?" Alex asks. He smiles and nods.

"He's a very good friend," He says. Alex begins to pout. Aaron looks at him and laughs.

"Alex you're so jealous," Aaron says. Alex blushed.

"Why are you saying that ???" asks Alex.

"I saw how you look at me when I'm with other people," Aaron says. Alex is looking elsewhere.

"I want you to pay more attention to me," Alex says embarrassed. Aaron is thinking of doing something to calm him down, but what?

"Excuse Alex," He says, kissing Alexander's cheek. Alex blushes so much that he hides his face with his hand.

"Aaron!" Alex says embarrassed, but so pleased with what he did.

"What? I pay more attention to you, "Aaron laughs. Alex smiles.

Alexander POV

We enter our dormitory.

Aaron sits on the couch and puts his bag on the floor. I sit down and give him a hug. He takes me in his arms. I smile at him.

"I love you Aaron," I say.

"Mmmh ..." He says to say yes. I am watching him. He looks elsewhere.

Something worries you? " He shakes my head.

"No nothing," He says hurriedly. He is moving away from my embrace. He does not look at me and do not talk to me.

Ring Ring!

His phone rings, He looks at him and gets up.

"Sorry, I have to take it." He says quickly. I nod and see him running to his room.

I wonder who can call Aaron. Maybe his parents or friends.

I decide to do my homework early to forget about Aaron's absence, but I can't.

I hear his laughter from where I am.

"Yes, remember?" Says Aaron excited. He's so cute, but why he's not like that with me?

"Yes, I'm thinking of you every day," He says smiling.

What ???

"No, I love you more than anyone !!!" He says, laughing and smiling.

My heart is breaking. He loves someone other than me.

"Why??? Because you're beautiful, funny and you understand me, Sally."

She's a girl ????

"Can I come to see you today?" He asks.

"Ok, I'm coming, then," He says with a smile.

I run into the dining room, sit down and pretend to review.

"Alex !!!" He shouts. I ignore him and put myself in a position where he will not see my face.

"I'll be back soon !!!" He says as he left.

As soon as the door closes I release my tears that I held back. At that moment I do not feel well and I decide to do something that I may regret.

I turn it on and see that it has a code, I can not see his contacts. But I see that in his wallpaper there is a girl on it.

She has black, smooth hair that makes her a bang and that hides an eye.

I remember her !!!! I met them one day when I entered my dormitory. I must calm down. I put the phone on the bed and look better at the room and see a purple picture frame, on the picture I see Aaron with a huge smile and a girl that looks like him on the screen of Aaron. I see Aaron so happy and the girl next to her too. My tears falls on the frame. And looking better at the frame I see small writings.

For my little brother whom I love with all my heart. By your big sister, Sally ♡.

I'm looking at the picture and it's true they look alike. I sigh with relief and rest the picture on the table.

I sit on his bed.

Aaron really loves me, actually. I was wrong, as usual. I smile at myself and put my head on the pillow. I notice that the cousin has a texture a little different from mine. I look at the cousin, there is something in the cushion cover. I take it.

It's a book???. As I open it, I notice Aaron's writing. It's his diary! I should not open it, I should not, but I could get to know him better, right? I open it and read it.

Third POV eye

Alex reads Aaron's diary. He didn't read from the beginning, he opened a random page and started reading.

* Time skip *

Now Alex knows that Aaron pretended to love him just so he would not suffer the atrocious words Alex told him. Alex didn't want to finish reading the diary. He put it in his place and he sat on the bed crying.

Alexander POV

"Alex ??? " Says a voice behind me.

Shit!!!

"What are you doing in my room?" He says in an angry voice. I turn around and see Aaron cross his arms.

"I...uh..." I can't speak.

"Are you crying?" He says surprised. He sits next to him and pats my back. I push him away.

"What's wrong?" He asks innocently.

"Why?" I ask between my cries.

"Why what?" He asks.

"Aaron, you pretend to love me," Alex says, looking at the man he'd made his believe he loved him. He looks away, his eyes go blank.

"I could not stand any more of what you were doing to me," He says frankly and without emotion.

"With Hercules hitting me and you telling me hurtful words, I could have done anything to not live in this nightmare."

"But I didn't know that Hercules hit you," I say sadly, but firmly.

"At least he had a reason. Not like you. You hurt me because you love me !! ?? " He says coldly. I want all this to be a horrible nightmare.

"Alex...I had feelings for you...but they left as soon as you hurt me," He says.

"I felt bad about myself. every day I thought I was weird. You feel bad, huh? But that's nothing compared to how I felt, " He says firmly. He runs out of the room.

"Aaron! Wait!!!" I say hesitating a little.

Aaron POV

I can't stand this suffering anymore !!! I have to do it. I have to do it. I'm going to the bathroom. I'm looking for the gillette that I hid in the wardrobe behind a bottle of shampoo.

You're a fool, you knew your freedom would not last long.

I take it, I lift my sleeves and watch my bandages. Do I have to do it?

Yes, no one needs you !!! Everyone has tired you down. Even your sister will do it.

"NO !!!!!"

With the blade in his hand I fall on my knees.

I take off my bandages. I watch the dry blood on my wrist and along my arms. I take the gillette and I advance near my skin.

"AARON !!!!" I gasp and release the gillette that reaches the ground.

I don't look at the person who called me. I bring to my arms my legs to my belly.

I feel arms around me and this person is crying.

"I'm really sorry, everything is my fault." He says in a broken voice.

"If I wasn't so stupid, you would not have hurt you. I'm really sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry ... " He says repeating "I'm sorry" in a loop. I lift my head and see Alex's hair. I feel it tremble. I feel like he thinks what he's saying.

Leave him. Do him hurt like him he did it to you.

Our eyes meet. I see tears running down his face, I take him in my arms. He keeps shaking and repeating the same words.

He serves me closer to him, I do the same.

"Alex don't apologize, I should do it," I say in a neutral voice.

"I'm sorry for hurting you so much, but I didn't want to suffer anymore," I says shyly. We remain in a long silence. Alex stopped shaking.

"You better go to sleep, Alex," I say to change the subject and also for his good. Alex does not say anything.

"Alex?" He's serving me harder.

"Excuse me," He says before sniffing.

I feel bad. He walks away and we get up.

He looks at my mutilated arm. I lower my sleeve so that he no longer guilt.

"Let me take care of you if you want to?" He asked shyly. I nod. He takes the first aid kit.

"Can you get up your sleeves, please?" He asks. I nod and do what he asked me. I am ashamed to show them.

"It's going to hurt a little." He puts the cotton soaked in disinfectant on my wounds. I grit my teeth not to scream, I did it many times alone, but I still hurt when I do, so I don't disinfect my wounds very well.

When he has finished disinfecting my two arms, he takes a bandage and puts it around my arms.

When he's done, I get up and give him a smile to thank him.

"Thanks, Alex," I say.

He looks at me, his eyes are filled with guilt and sadness. He nods.

"I'll take you back to your room," I say. We leave the bathroom and I go to his room.

"Do you want something to drink?" I ask. He shakes his head. I nod.

"Are you sure? You don't want it? "He nods. I'm thinking.

"I'm going to make food, do you care about paws?" I ask.

"No, I'm not hungry," He says as he sat down on his bed.

"Alex...don't think about it ..." I say, wanting to comfort him.

"I don't know how you do to move on. I hurt you, " He says sadly.

"Alex, I hurt you too. You should hate me, "I said calmly.

"I...I ca...can't," He says. I am surprised for what he told me.

I go up to him and get on my knees.

"Alex..." I take him in my arms.

"I don't want you to feel bad because of me," I say.

"All I did was make you cry. Let me at least make you some food, "I say. He serves me in his arms and serves me strong against him.

"Okay..." He murmurs.

"Thank you," I say. I walk away from him and go into the kitchen to prepare the food.

Alexander POV

When I saw him on the ground with his arms mutilated, all my anger disappeared to give way to guilt. I blame myself so much.

When I treated him, I had trouble keeping my tears.

Aaron has already moved on, but I can't forget his arms covered with wounds. I think back to everything he said.

He told me he had feelings for me before I hurt him.

The worst is that he consoles me, after all that we made ourselves. I don't understand it, but that's why I love him.

* Tim skip *

The door opens. Aaron smiles at me.

"It's ready," He says. I get up and go to the dining room.

We eat in an embarrassing silence. I cut the silence by asking him a question.

"Aaron?" He finishes eating and answers me.

"Yes?"

"Why did you love me before?" I ask him. He looks elsewhere.

"Because you are everything I am not," he said frankly.

"What?"

"You are beautiful, incredibly intelligent and many people love you. But especially your kindness, I saw you once give money to an old homeless lady, this gesture really touched me. " He said, drinking water. I blush.

"And you? Why do you love me? "He asks.

"I ... I love your smile .... and..you look mysterious," I say shyly. He is laughing. I blush again.

"You're so cute, Alex," He says with a smile.

It's weird, I feel that her smile is sweeter than any other smile I've seen.

"Aaron, if you want for your good, we can stop being in a relationship. I would not tell anyone what I saw or why you wanted to be with me," I say calmly. I didn't want to part with him, but if it makes him happy, that's all that matters.

"Alex..." He says.

"Can we at least stay friends?" I ask. I want us to talk together.

"Yes, Alexander," He says with a smile.

"For our friends?" I ask. He looks at me confused.

"Should we tell them for us?" I ask nervously. He shakes his head.

"It's not worth it," He says, standing up and ridding everything on the table. I nod. He is doing the dishes.

"Aaron?" I say.

"Yes?"

"Where are my homework?" I ask, looking for them.

"Why do you need it?" He asks.

"What do you want to do with homework assignments to work on?" I ask ironically. He smiles at me.

"I hid them," He says.

"WHY?!?!" I ask.

"We have no duty for tomorrow," He says.

"And?" I ask.

"You have to rest," He says. I groan and sulk.

"But I don't want to." I say.

"Before you wanted..." He says. I look at him outraged.

"Not at all," I say, waving my hands. He is laughing.

"I'm going to get them anyway," I say sulkily. He is laughing

"You're never going to find them," He says as he finished doing the dishes.

"Good night," He says with a smile. He leaves to finally be arrested by me. I hold his hand, being careful not to hurt him.

"Aaron?" I say shyly. He looks at me with a smile.

"Yes?" He says.

"G... good night," I say, letting go of his hand.

He smiles at me and goes to his room. I do the same. I put on my pajamas and lie on my bed.

I love you Aaron, but I don't understand you. Why do you...why I ... I decide not to think about it anymore and fall asleep.

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