Logan tapped his pen against his desk, thinking about his friends and the conversation they had held earlier that day. It wasn't that he had a problem with them knowing, he was just concerned about what it could mean for their friendship. What if his ex came back and started bothering the both of them too? What if he had to choose to keep them safe and have himself be unhappy? Of course, he'd put them first, but at what cost?

"Logan?" He jumped slightly and turned to look at his friend. Roman frowned at him and rest a hand atop his. "Are you okay? You seem really out of it?"

Logan nodded, his voice catching in his throat. He wanted to talk to Roman, to tell him everything, including his feelings for Roman, but he couldn't. He couldn't bring himself to say anything. He pined over someone he'd known forever, who he could lose if he said anything. He hated that he felt the way he did, but he didn't know what to do, short of never feeling anything like that again.

"Lo?" Virgil spoke up, and he looked across to his friend, noticing the way his movement seemed to gain Patton's attention too. "You can talk to us, you know that, right?"

"Yeah." He managed out, his voice a whisper. "Yeah, I know." He wasn't very reassuring, but he didn't know what else he could say that could be convincing at this point. He wasn't okay. He wasn't happy, and he was confused. He didn't know what to do

Roman squeezed his hand, and Logan looked to him, a small frown tugging at his features. Roman had always been the most compassionate out of them all, despite his overly zealous personality, he was always the one to care for his friends. An unreadable expression danced in his eyes and Logan looked back to his page of half done problems. He was making his friends worry and he didn't know what to do about it.

He looked over to Patton, who sat silent throughout the whole thing. Logan wasn't sure why he decided to sit with them, but he wasn't complaining, the silence could be nice at times. He wanted to apologise for all their troubles, and how annoying they were, almost all the time. He wanted to make another friend, but he felt like running away, all the time.

Patton met his gaze and sent him a sad smile, trying to let him know it would be okay, that everything would work itself out in the end, but all it served to do, was push him further over to the almost crying stage.

"I have to... Uh..." Logan cut himself off and stood up, not meeting his friends gazes. "I have to go." He managed out before bolting out of the classroom, leaving three confused males at his table.

-

"What was that about?" Roman frowned, looking over to Patton and Virgil, who shrugged.

"Maybe he got overwhelmed? It happens to the best of us." Virgil suggested, not really knowing much about what was going through his friend's head, but he wanted to try and help.

"He looked like he was about to cry." Patton finally spoke up, ignoring the glances he got from Virgil. "Do you not agree?"

"I mean, yeah, but Logan doesn't..." Roman frowned.

"He was this morning, before first period. Unless you forget that his eyes were so red he looked like he could have been crying for three hours."

Virgil nodded in agreement. "He's right, Ro. I think maybe someone needs to go after him."

"I'll go." Roman stood up, looking between the two males across from him, only getting a couple of nods in response.

He walked out of the room and towards the bathrooms, frowning when he heard crying from one of the stalls.

"Lo?"

Logan's breath hitched in his chest and Roman frowned.

"Please, no."

"Why no?"

"I can't... Not... You."

Roman felt his heart drop. "Please come out?"

"Why?"

"We need to talk."

"About?"

"You. You seem to be really out of it today, and you need a friend."

"No I don't." Logan's voice cut through the silence, anger laced through each of the words. "I don't need a friend. I need someone who will always be there, who will make sure I know how loved I am. I don't need a friend. I need something more."

"Where is this coming from?"

"It's coming from me. From everything being bottled up too much. It's coming from the feelings that I hate and that I don't want. I don't want to love you. I don't. But I do, and I hate it. Why can't I love someone else? Why does it have to be you? It's always you, it's always, always you. My best friend, someone I can trust and who is always there, but I keep trying to push away because I don't want to love you. Not like this. Because you won't love me too, and I want someone to love me. I need it." Logan's voice decreased and before Roman could say anything, Logan spoke up again. "I love you, Roman, and it's painful..."

866 words

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