So my cousin (not the annoying one) came over. I let her jump on my trampoline for a while, then go out to check on her.

When I come, she is poking a bug that is crawling on the trampoline netting, yelling, "March, slave, march!"

I look at her and ask, "What are you doing?"

She replies, "This is my bug. I am his queen and he has to follow my commands."

Wow.

But she is literally controlling the bug with a stick. She puts the stick by it and it runs away in fear of being poked again. So she is controlling where it goes.

Her: His name is Hugh.

Me: Why?

Her: Remember? The movie you were watching? There was a big scary monster named Hugh.

Me: Okay...(clueless)

Her: (to Hugh) Stay!

Hugh actually stays on that area and doesn't move.

Me: Wow! What do you do if it moves?

Her: I do what they did in the movie.

Me: (again, clueless) Okay...

Hugh: *starts crawling)

So she runs up to it holding up the stick yelling "HUGH SHALL NOT PASS!"

she thought the balrog's name was Hugh

I died right there laughing.

Jen, if you're reading this, I am so very proud of you.