"Got your ticket?" Maude asked.

I held it up in my hand. She turned to Brett sitting on our couch. "I'll be fine," he rasped, throat still sore. "I can make a cuppa and have a nap if I want." Maude gave him a kiss. 

"There might still be tickets available," she said. "At the doors."

"You go on ahead," Brett said wrapping the blanket around himself. "I need the rest."

"You're not just going to practise singing, are you? So help me, Bretty, if you even think about--"

"I won't, my love, I promise." He gave her a trustworthy smile. Maude snuggled into him, Brett giving her a kiss on the head. "Don't have my girl out too late," he told me. 

"No promises, sir," I replied. Maude gave Brett one last kiss on his cheek and followed me to the door, wrapping an arm around my neck. 

"We'll be back around midnight!"

**********

"Do you know where the venue is?" I asked once again finding myself weaving through crowds of people. Maude nibbled on her fruit kebab and looked around.

"It was right around....oh, here!" she cried pointing at a white building. There was a man outside selling tickets from a booth and a long stretch of people waiting their turn. The gig started in less than fifteen minutes so I was glad Maude bought our tickets beforehand. She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside, the cool night air replaced with stuffy spotlights. "AC/DC opened for these guys, I want to see if they're any good."

"Oh....that's-that's nice," I said trying to rid my mind of a certain beautiful man in a tie. It was okay, I'd see him again, he promised. Forget about them for now, go on and watch this gig instead. Unfortunately I didn't have my headphones with me; they were sitting at home. But with Maude by my side I didn't worry so much about the sensory overload. 

I could handle it. 

Before the fifteen minutes were up the lights went down and the crowd hushed before erupting into a massive roar as the most interesting looking man in the most interesting looking costume I'd ever seen take the stage. I looked to Maude and leaned over. "Who did you say these guys were?"

"Some American band called Aerosmith. Don't think I've heard too much of them back home." I squinted and tried to see exactly what these guys looked like but all I got was the lead singer. He started singing and I couldn't decide if I liked it or not. 

Definitely some talent. But not my favourite sounding voice....nothing like Bon's. 

I looked to Maude to gauge her reaction. She looked at me, horrified. "What have we done?" she asked. 

I faced the stage and was hit with a very bright spotlight some crew member was shining at the audience. Speaking of the audience, one man got rather drunk and was dancing his way through the crowd, bumping people as he passed. He wasn't wearing a shirt.

Sweet Jesus, don't let him come over here....

Something soft hit me in the back of the head. I carefully turned around and saw a woman's bra lying on the floor behind me. Maude squealed and I saw a pair of pink knickers hiding her face from view. With tentative fingers she gripped the knickers like they were covered in slime and tossed them away. I finally got a long enough look at the band to see what they looked like. All on the taller side, taller than what I'm used to. Very....

How's a nice way to put this....

Not the kind of rockstar I'd want to take home to Mum. 

Rather cocky and an odd definition of flamboyant. The lead's vocals stretched like latex gloves and snapped at the end of the verse. He strutted around the stage offering his hand to the women up front like he was their saviour. I don't mind eccentricity in the slightest but I was glad it wasn't my face he was swinging his pelvis at. 

Fuck the headphones, I needed a whole paper bag over my head. 

Shattering scared me shitless and I looked wildly about. Someone had thrown a bottle and a large man in a black shirt escorted him out. 

Well, hoisted him over his shoulder and threw him out the door. 

Not to say AC/DC concerts were quiet gatherings but this was too much. I would have suggested we leave if I knew Maude could hear my voice over the ruckus. A fight broke out somewhere near the back and it got pretty ugly. I will give the band credit. They kept playing even when things got....less than ideal. 

But I wouldn't ever see them again. 

**********

The circus went on for an hour before they called it a night and left the stage. Maude and I were out of there like rockets. Sweat poured down our backs and our ears were ringing, heads hurting. Pushing the door open we fell onto the footpath, attracting the attention of some passing patrons. Gulping air like fine wine and letting the cool breeze cleanse us of our sins. My eyes were closed as I lay on the ground. 

"I want what they're having," someone yelled. 

"That bad, eh?" a man's voice about a metre away said. "I always knew it."

"Can't handle the champs!" a woman called. Maude and I sat up like two sweaty pigs. We looked so awful, we'd laugh about it had we not been assaulted by flying knickers and rogue spotlights. 

Give it a few days. Or weeks....

Standing up we kept our eyes straight on, not even glancing at the teasing tourists. "Poor things saw them?"

"Like a night of good sex, that band is."

One whistled.

**********

The music playing in the lift did nothing to lift our spirits from the cock rock catastrophe we endured. Did nothing to erase the passing comments we got on the street. Did jack shit to wash the smell of sweaty knickers off our skin. 

Where was a hot shower when you needed one?

Maude stared straight ahead at the elevator doors while I looked at the carpet. We were the only two people in there, thank God. I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. I pushed my long hair out of my face and tapped my heel on the ground. The lift was taking ages. 

"We paid money for that," Maude finally said. I opened my mouth to answer and still nothing came out. So I just nodded in agreement. Maude swallowed back disgust. 

Never again.