CHAPTER THIRTEEN.
alone and forsaken by fate and by man

( tw! contains mentions of sexual assault )

MARGO BURRELL was no stranger to the cruelty she was forced to face in the midst of such an ugly world.

     She was born into it after all. From the moment she left the comfort of her mother's womb, she was thrusted into a world that was too cruel for a girl with a heart of gold like herself. Margo knew she wasn't meant for this kind of life — that somewhere along the way the universe got it wrong and put her into the centre of so much carnage. However, Margo wasn't the kind of girl to sit and sulk about her misfortune in life. She took all the bad into the palm of her dainty hand and crushed it in between her fingers. No matter what the world threw her way, Margo met it with continuity and a force so strong that it couldn't be reckoned with.

     When Margo lost her parents, she cried, she mourned, but she never let it break her. Margo rolled back her shoulders, wiped her tears and promised her parents she would give Sam a better life than what they gave Henry and herself. When Sam was first diagnosed with a near-fatal disease, she swallowed the irrational fear of losing her brother and found ways to keep him alive long enough for Henry to find a permanent solution. When Henry got in trouble for stealing, hoping to provide a decent meal for her and Sam, Margo walked into the office of FEDRA's commanding officer and begged for her brother's freedom over a brutal execution.

     And when that commanding officer put his hands all over Margo, and touched her in ways no teenage girl should be touched, her screams for help ripping her vocal cords and bellowing off the walls of the small room, she didn't let that shatter her. She should've. But she didn't. She couldn't because she had her two brothers depending on her to be strong. So she fixed her hair, buttoned up her torn blouse, wiped her tears, and returned home, and only hours later so did Henry. Their family was whole again because of her sacrifice. The loss of her innocence, and the mental scars of what that FEDRA officer did to her was a sacrifice that could've mattered. That was why Margo never let herself break. It had to mean something. . . and it did.

     That was until Henry sold out Kathleen's brother for medicine that would save Sam's life. Then Kathleen and her loyal followers rebelled against the ruthless cruelty forced on them by FEDRA, and she put a bounty on the heads of the Burrell siblings, forcing Margo and her brothers to flee from their home and into a dark city filled with uncertainty. And with the harrowing feeling that they may not survive, well, it was the first time Margo felt the cruelty of the world beginning to weigh heavy on her shoulders. If losing her virtue meant nothing and Henry died anyways, then Margo would surely lose herself. The girl with a heart of gold would be no more, and that scared her most of all — losing herself — who she's always been.

But with the help of their new allies, Margo was starting to regain some of the hope she lost after leaving her home and all the memories that came with it. She believed with some help, her brothers and herself could actually escape from the city alive, free from the fear of getting caught. Margo's hope continued to burn bright, like a beacon shining in the middle of such harrowing darkness, or a series of tunnels wrapping around all across the underneath of the city. Margo knew of the potential dangers lurking in the exact tunnels she found herself walking through, but she didn't once let her hope of getting out dimmer. Not now, and hopefully not ever.

And when Margo stepped into the tunnel, her flashlight clutched tightly in her hand as she turned it on, illuminating the dark tunnel displayed in front of her weary eyes. It was clear. Just like they had all hoped. Just like both her and Henry had previously suspected. A small smile found its way to Margo's lips just as her brother parted his lips to speak. "See, it's empty. The plan is good." Henry spoke proudly, his voice echoing down the tunnel.

Joel was quick to shush him, his stern expression focused primarily on the eldest of the Burrell siblings. "The plan is good?" Joel questioned in disbelief. "We've been down here for two seconds. We don't know anything." He added before he began to walk ahead from the rest of the group.

     Margo let out a quiet huff and trailed behind the older man. She had only just met Joel, but she could tell he was a survivor hardened by the world he was forced into two decades ago. Margo had maintained her heart of gold, refusing to let it turn into rot. She never wanted to lose the sweet and innocent girl she was born to be. No matter what the world threw into her direction, she never once succumbed to the ugliness of the cruel world. However, just from the past few hours she has spent with him, Margo could see Joel was once a good person, forced to become the ruthless and cold man he was now.

"Your dad is kind of a pessimist." Margo heard Henry say from behind her, causing for the girl to look over her shoulder to see the comment was directed towards the younger girl, Ellie.

     "He's not my dad." Ellie was quick to deny.

     "I'm not her dad." Joel was just as fast with his words, shocking Margo and Henry. It was almost as if they were trying to deny it to themselves.

Margo rolled her eyes in response and continued to walk down the dark tunnel with the others, shining her torch in the process, the bright light illuminating the path in front of her. She then quickly stopped when they stumbled into a section of the tunnel covered in all kids of drawings. There were scribbled of flowers in various colours, stick figures with swords in their hands and when she shined her torch towards the door it was painted to look like an entrance into a grand castle. A small smile found its way to Margo's lips, reminding her that childlike innocence could still exist in such an ugly and cutthroat world.

     She wasn't the only one feeling the tiniest ounce of joy either. It didn't take long for Sam to smile as he quickly brushed past Margo and made his way towards the doors, his hand reaching out for the rusted handle in front of him. However, he was quickly stopped by Vienna who put her arm out in front of the young boy, preventing him from going any further. The older woman then shook her head, and muttered a firm "No" under her breath in the process. Although Margo was already aware of this information from their introduction hours before, it was easy for her to tell Vienna was a mother. Margo was an observer and she could tell Vienna had those motherly instincts deep rooted into her. It was greatly admired.

     Vienna then stepped forward and opened the door, pushing it open before she shined her torch inside, observing the interior of the next room closely. Once the woman knew it was safe, she pushed the door fully open and allowed the others inside. And when Margo entered the room, she was left surprised when she saw what appeared to be an underground room where children could play. It appeared to be an underground settlement to the naked eye. The girl had heard stories about them, but she never knew if they were true or a world full of fiction. That is until now.

"I've heard about places like this. People went underground after outbreak day. They built settlements." Joel's familiar voice flooded the girl's ears, causing for her to look back at the older man with a curious look burning in her eyes.

"What happened to them then?" Margo inquired, furrowing her brows together.

Joel let out a quiet sigh, looking back at the Burrell girl. "Maybe they didn't follow the rules and they all got infected." He assumed, thinking of the most logical outcome, the thought beginning to run up Margo's spine shortly after Joel had spoken.

     "Eh..." Ezra piped up, looking around with a deadpan look plastered across his face. "That sounds about right. Happens to everyone sooner or later."

     Margo turned around to look back at the boy, her blood beginning to boil when she heard those words leave his lips. "Hey, you could at least express some empathy. There were clearly good people living down here." She pointed out.

     Ezra clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, his eyes meeting Margo's as he began to brush past her. "I'm just being realistic." He replied.

     Once Ezra was on the other side of the room, his back turned to face the girl, Margo clenched her jaw tightly, glaring into his direction as her quivering lips parted so she could speak. "Dick." She muttered quietly underneath her breath.

Margo continued to look around at the various drawing scattered across the stone walls of the underground settlement. Although the innocence of childhood was maintained in these drawings, there was still something so morbid about them, knowing these drawings still stood in a place where dozens of innocent civilians died to the infection that swarmed each corner of the earth. It sent a cold chill up Margo's spine, wishing there had been a better outcome for these people. Maybe in another life where things weren't so cruel and ugly, maybe they did have the happy ending that was formerly ripped away from them.

The girl was then snapped back to reality when she heard Ellie chatting away to Sam, trying to communicate with him using sign language. It was another sight that made all the other things disappear into the far corner of her mind. They were discussing a comic book, one her brother was obsessed with. It just so happened Ellie read it too. It was a nice sight to see them both so excited over something so small. It brought another smile to Margo's lips as she continued to watch them, listening as Ellie cursed enthusiastically, high-fiving Sam in the process.

     That was until Joel stepped in, "Hey, keep it down. We're not out yet."

     "Oh, come on." Ellie replied, sounding annoyed. "Can we just rest here for a while? Like there's actually shit to do here."

     Joel appeared hesitant at first, his eyes focused on Ellie for a second before he turned to Vienna, the pair exchanging a series of looks, almost like they were communicating with each other through each other's eyes. Once again, Margo observed. She could see they weren't just two individuals who stumbled upon each other in the midst of the apocalypse. They had history — shared history that allowed them to remain on mutual ground with one another. That they could listen and agree on matters that many couldn't. Margo could only assume they were more than travel companions.

     But she kept that thought to herself. Especially when Henry broke the pair out of their trance. "It wouldn't be so bad to wait it out. It should be a bit different when we pop back out in the shadows." He spoke up, hoping to convince Joel and Vienna to let them rest for a bit before they continued their escape from the desolate city.

And just like that. . . Joel shook his head and turned around while Vienna let out a soft sigh, declaring defeat.

     Later that night, when Margo sat around a table with Henry, Vienna, Joel and Ezra, all of them watching as Ellie and Sam acted, well, as they acted like children for once in their lives. It was a joyful sight to see. It even brought another smile to Margo's lips as she watched Sam kick the old soccer ball into the makeshift goal drawn out by some old chalk. Ellie laughed as she missed the ball before she wrapped her arms around the younger boy and began to spin him around in her arms. Margo couldn't help but smile again, but this time a soft chuckle slipped past her lips, wishing Sam had gotten to experienced more childlike moments like this one. Hopefully once they escaped from the city there was still room for those memories to be made.

     All of a sudden, the girl was snapped back to reality when she heard Joel clear his throat. This caused for Margo to lift her gaze to stare back at the older man who had his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes flickering between Henry and Margo. "If you were collaborating to take care of him, I shouldn't have said what I said. I don't know your situation and I'm not saying they should let it go. But all thing considered, it seems kind of cruel to send a whole army after you for that." Joel explains, sounding puzzled towards the end of his sentence.

     Margo let out a quiet scoff, "Well, it's not so much about him being a collaborator. It's who he decided to send to the noose that got us in this mess to begin with."

Henry shot his younger sister an agitated look, a glimmer of disbelief twinkling in his dark eyes. "We talked about this. I had no choice." He whispered to the girl through gritted teeth.

"And it doesn't make it right either." Margo countered in return, leaving the others sitting around the table to watch the disagreement unfold between the two eldest of the Burrell siblings. "Just because you did it to help Sam doesn't mean it was right. We lost everything because of your decision. Now Sam and I might actually pay the price of your mistakes."

Before Henry could respond, Margo stood up from her seat and walked away into the opposite direction, taking a seat on the ground in the far corner of the condensed room. The girl let out a shaky breath past her trembling lips, a heavy feeling weighing hard on her chest, a thick lump stuck in the back of her throat. Margo wanted to cry and scream at her brother for his past decisions. Not because she disagreed with him. She knew Henry had no choice if he wanted to save Sam's life. Margo was just scared that Kathleen and her army of loyal followers would catch up to them, kill them all and leave their remains to rot. She didn't want to end up like everyone else. She wanted a better life outside of Kansas City, and she couldn't have that if she was dead.

Margo was soon joined by someone else. She could feel their presence as they took a seat on the ground beside her. When Margo lifted her gaze and turned her to the side, she was surprised to see Vienna sitting beside her, a half smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "That was intense back there." The woman commented.

     A sigh left Margo's lips as she ran a hand through her messy black curls. "Yeah. I'm sorry about that. It's just a lot at the moment. I know Henry's trying his best. I'm just so angry and scared at the moment." She admitted. "I don't want my sacrifices to mean nothing." She then blurted out, instantly regretting her decision to speak at all.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Vienna then asked the girl politely, not pushing her to elaborate further, but rather she was letting Margo make the decision to unload all of her pent-up emotions.

     Margo did wonder if it was right to vent to someone she barely knew. It should've always been her older brother who she told this stuff too, but she never could because she knew how he would react to her trials and tribulations during their times in the QZ. Margo never wanted Henry to risk his life for her so she remained silent through some of the darkest moments of her life. She didn't even tell a single soul. Then everything got so difficult after losing their home and being forced to flee that Margo didn't see the point in telling Henry at all. But she needed to tell someone. She knew that much for sure. So maybe telling a complete stranger would be easier than telling someone she loved, and who loved her.

Releasing another breath past her quivering lips, Margo decided to finally lift the weight off of her chest, saying the words she never thought she would say out loud. "Have you heard the stories about the FEDRA soldiers here?" She questioned, lifting her gaze to meet the woman's.

Vienna nodded her head, "Yeah. Their notoriously known for torturing prisoners and raping women and children. They're the worst of the worst." Vienna then continued to stare at Margo, watching as her expression faltered, a wave of sadness flooding her eyes. That was when the woman realised. "Oh, honey. I'm so sorry." She apologised, a empathetic stare burning in her gaze while she continued to stare at the young teenage girl.

"I was sixteen." Margo confessed, her voice quiet, scared of the others overhearing her's and Vienna's conversation. "Henry had gotten into some trouble. He stole food to feed Sam and I. He got caught and he was going to be executed. I was so scared to lose him and be left alone to take care of Sam that I was desperate enough to go to the commanding officers office and beg for him to spare Henry's life. I told him I would do anything. I would pick up grunt work in the QZ. I would've done anything if it meant my brother would live."

     Vienna didn't say anything in response. She just continued to listen as Margo continued to speak, "He told me he would let my brother go. Keep it off the record. I knew it was too easy, and it was." Margo paused, swallowing thickly as her mind flashback to that harrowing day in the commanding FEDRA officer's office. The moment her life changed forever.

     "When I tried to leave he pushed me up against his desk. He put his hands underneath my shirt and I pushed him away. I told him I didn't want that. I just wanted my brother to come home." Margo turned away from Vienna after that, avoiding her sad eyes. "But he told me that a favour that big meant he needed something else in return. Something that even out the scores." The girl let out a bitter chuckle, wiping away the stray tear beginning to roll down her cheek.

     "I was sixteen and I had no fighting skills compared to him. He pinned me down on that desk, he tore off my clothes and he...he raped me. I even screamed for help. But the problem with FEDRA is that no matter what they'll always have each other's backs. They all stood outside the room while he raped me and didn't do a thing to stop it. I just had to take it and wait for him to finish." From the corner of Margo's eye, she saw Vienna cup her hand over her mouth while the other reached out to grab her own with a comforting touch.

     "Did you ever tell your brother about this?" Vienna inquired curiously.

     Margo shook her head in response to the woman's words. "My brother hasn't got a mean bone in his body. But he would've killed that FEDRA officer with his bare hands if he had known. And I know now it doesn't matter because FEDRA are gone, but it wouldn't change what happened. And I'm so angry because I lost a small part of myself that day. I didn't let it define me as a person, but I knew my sacrifice had to mean something, and now I'm scared that if something bad happens to Henry or Sam now then what I lost that day would all be for nothing." She explained, inhaling sharply shortly afterwards.

It was silent between the two for a moment. That was until Vienna decided to speak, "You want to know what I think?" Margo glanced at the older woman again, waiting for her to say what she was thinking deep down.

"I think you should tell Henry once you're all safe out of the city." Vienna informed. Margo tried to protest against her suggestion, but the woman beat her to it once again. "I know what it's like to be tormented by a man that made my life hell. Carrying a secret that big is a heavy burden to carry all on your own. I was lucky enough to have someone I could turn to when I needed a shoulder to cry on. He was always there when I needed him. Maybe Henry could be that person for you." Vienna's eyes drifted over to where Joel sat at the table along with Ezra and Henry, her gaze softening at the sight of him.

Margo was quick to clock this, her eyes staring off into the same direction Vienna was staring into, realising she was staring directly at Joel. Margo then hummed quietly. "Yeah, your husband seems like a good guy." She told her.

Vienna was taken by surprise when she heard those words roll off of Margo's tongue, a confused expression plastered across her face. "What? No, Joel isn't my husband. We were really good friends before the world ended and found each other again recently. That's all." She corrected, a sheepish grin ghosting across her lips.

"Really?" Margo replied, furrowing her brows together as her gaze shifted between Vienna and Joel. The girl then shrugged her shoulders. "Well, you guys could've fooled me."

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     It was dark by the time Margo and the others emerged from the tunnels. It was dark, quiet and desolate, just like they suspected, which also happened to be a win in her book. At least she didn't have to worry about Kathleen and her people. They could just escape and be done with Kansas City once and for all. Then Margo would never have to think about the one place filled with so many dark memories ever again. It was relief in her eyes. She didn't have to fear FEDRA or Kathleen and her loyal followers. She could just live far away with the company of her brothers. Just them, together in peace at last. It was all she wanted. Margo craved it more than anything else in the world.

Suddenly, Margo felt someone nudge her, causing for the girl to look to her right, staring down at her younger brother in the process. "Why can't we use our lights?" Sam asked, using his hands to sign. Margo let out a sigh, raising her hands to communicate back.

"He thinks it will draw attention. So we can't." She replied, shrugging her shoulders as she nodded towards Joel who was leading them through the dark residential area.

Sam frowned in response to Margo's response before he replied, "But no one's here?" Margo nodded her head, rolling her eyes because her little brother actually had a point.

Henry then caught onto their conversation, letting out a sigh of his own. "No one is here. No one's gonna be here because the plan worked." He chimed, a look filled with sweet victory plastered across his face. A small smile ghosted its ways across Margo's lips when she spotted the joy in her brother's eyes. She hoped they could feel that joy more once they escaped from the city.

"So much goddamn talking." Joel quickly commented, sounding almost exhausted from today's events.

Margo stepped forward with an exciting spring in her step, her lips parting to speak in the process. "Yeah, but the plan still worked. Now we just have to take a right up this way and then go down the street. There should be a bridge up ahead after that." She explained, clapping her hands together.

"Then we cross the bridge to freedom?" Margo looked over her shoulder to see Ezra staring back at her, and she could've sworn she saw a smile on the boy's face. The girl briefly smiled back at Ezra for a moment before she nodded her head, turning back around shortly after.

"So we cross the river and then what?" Ellie's familiar voice broke through the brief moment of silence between the group, her eyes darting between each other the Burrell siblings. "Where are you gonna go?" She then asked them.

Margo never really thought about what she would do with her life if she ever managed to escape Kansas City with her life still intact. Maybe the Burrell siblings could find a community to be a part of. A good one filled with good people. Maybe she could start living a relatively normal life without the ongoing fear of losing her life to bandits or the infected. And even if they never find a community to be a part of, at least she would be far away from Kansas City and with her brothers. Her true home. The only one she's ever truly belonged to. As long as she had Henry and Sam, Margo knew she would be okay.

"I don't know yet." Henry confessed.

"Well, we're going to Wyoming." Ellie informed them, earning a disapproving look from Joel in response. Ellie then shrugged her shoulders. "What? It's a big state. It can fit three more people." She defended, hoping Joel would be on board soon enough.

Margo then shook her head. "It's okay, Ellie. We can find our own way." She reassured the younger girl.

"He'll change his mind. Trust me. This is how it goes. He's like, 'No, Ellie. Never ever happening." Ellie retorted, mimicking Joel's voice by deepening her own tone, causing for Vienna to let out a chuckle as she continued to walk beside the younger girl. "Then I'm like, I'm gonna ask you a million more times and—"

Ellie didn't even get a chance to finish her sentence because in a matter of seconds, she was quickly cut off by the startling sound of a violent gunshot echoing through the air, the bullet landing directly into the concrete in front of them. Margo was quick to grab Sam's hand, lacing her fingers with his own before she pulled him behind the nearest car along with the others who stayed hidden away from the sniper. Gunshots continued to echo through the air, causing for Margo's breathing to grow heavy and erratic, thinking about how close that bullet was to hitting Sam. If he had walked any further then he would surely be wounded, or worse. . . Dead.

     "What do we do?" Henry was the first to ask, turning to Joel for answers.

     "Stay here. If you don't move, he's not gonna hit you." Joel answered, making an attempt to stand up but Vienna was quick to pull him back down, staring into the man's eyes with a serious look flashing over her own.

     "And what about you?" Vienna asked him, sounding almost concerned for his safety.

     Joel swallowed thickly, his eyes meeting the woman's. "I'm gonna go around, try and get into the house from the back and then I'll take him out." He elaborated, but Vienna shook her head in response to his words.

     "And what if he hits you?" She reminded Joel, her voice beginning to shake. Vienna was scared for him, fearing for Joel's life more than he did. It showed she still genuinely cared about him, even after twenty years of separation.

     "It's dark and he has shit aim. Nobody's gonna kill me." Joel argued, causing for Vienna to part her lips to speak once again, making an attempt to protest against Joel's decision to be the hero as always. However, Joel beat her to it, reaching out a grabbing the woman's hand with his own, giving it a gentle and reassuring squeeze. "Hey, do you trust me?"

Vienna lowered her gaze to look at Joel's hand latching onto her own, a familiar feeling of sparks cascading across her pale skin. Then she lifted her gaze to stare deeply into Joel's eyes, getting lost in his gaze for a moment. And for a moment Vienna was staring at the old Joel Miller. The same man who she used to stand at Sarah's soccer games with. The same man who cleaned up her cuts and bruises after a fight with her late husband. The same person she called her best friend decades ago. And in that moment Vienna did trust him. So she let go of his hand and let him go.

And all she could do was hope and pray Joel Miller would come back to her.

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authors note.
This chapter was A LOT mentally. I just want to wrap Margo in a blanket and protect her from the world...and what she's about to go through in the next chapter I'm sorry in advance 😭 BUT ALSO SOME JIENNA CRUMBS BECAUSE ITS HAPPENING GUYS!!!

Until then I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and I'll update again soon!!!