Lee Know p.o.v.

I slept with Han last night and I hadn't slept this well in days. I had missed him too much.

I know why I kissed him and I think I've accepted how I feel about him now. But I don't want to push him, I don't want to scare him. I don't mind being just his friend. My only wish is to be able to stay close to him and protect him. I want to feel his fingers intertwined with mine, his perfume, I want see that he cares about me.

That's enough, absolutely enough for me. We don't necessarily have to go any further.

Now we are in the middle of the ISAC, Idol Star Athletics Championships. There are few fans in the stands supporting us, but the stadium is full of idol groups. And for Han, maybe it's even worse than in the airport.

In any case he seems to be fine: he went to the vending machines with Felix, came back and handed me a snack. He knew I hadn't eaten breakfast today and I love that he cares about me with those little actions.

Han can't easily tell you how much he loves you, but he shows it to you like this, with spontaneous sweet gestures.

I'm looking at him with a smile, when I sense something is wrong. I see Seungmin and Chan change their expression: they seem worried.

They are 2 meters away from me, next to Han, but I can't hear what they are saying. Seungmin puts a hand on Han's shoulder. I can't see Jisung's face, but I understand that something is happening. I walk over them quickly. 

«Shall I take him out?» Seungmin's voice barely reaches me in the midst of the confusion. He's talking to Chan. 

Han turns around and I finally can see his face: he's pale, his eyes are lost, his lips seem to be muttering something. It doesn't seem like his usual panic attack, but he is not feeling good at all.

As I approach them I hear what he's mumbling:

«Minho...»

He is calling me.

I finally reach them and I immediately take both his hands, standing in front of him. I have no idea what to do, I'm not as good as Changbin in that kind of things, but I know he needs me now.

«I don't feel like myself...» he mumbles. His eyes are filled with terror, his pupils are small. He looks at me, but I don't know if he really sees me.

Chan looks at me: «He said something about depersonalization, but I dunno what that means. Should I call Changbin?»

«He went to the bathroom» Seungmin explains.

I think I read something about depersonalization once but I have no idea what to do. I need him to talk to me.

«Han, do you want to go to a quiet place? With me?» I ask him, cutely patting his hair.

He nods and I gently take his hand.

«We'll back soon» I say to Chan and Seungmin. They nod and I lead Han away from the crowds, in one of the corridors of the stadium. Then we exit from the back and find ourselves in a green, sunlit open space.

I look around, making sure no one is there.

«Please, sit here, baby» I point to the fresh grass and he obeys, even if slowly. 

«Min, am I going crazy?» he asks me, with teary eyes.

«Absolutely not, baby, you are just overstressed and you are having a depersonalization. It should pass soon...» I say, sitting next to him.

«I'm not me, Min, my thoughts don't seem to belong to me...» he cries.  

His face is a mask of fear and panic. I would like to take all the pain from him, not to see him like this. I feel fucking useless.

I hug him, tightly, trying to not let my tears follow his. I have to stay calm, for him.

«It's horrible, honey, but it's only a moment. It will pass, I promise.» 

I stroke his hair and start whispering sweet words to him, as he did on the airplane for me.

«Are you my little jagi? My Jisung?» 

He nods, sobbing.

«Do you know that you are really beautiful? You are my beautiful jagi.»

Gradually he stops crying and falls asleep for a few moments in my arms. I wish I could let him sleep but after some minutes I have to wake him up. We are not safe out here, there could be STAYs or some journalists.

«Baby, we can't stay here under the sun.» I awake him kindly, «How do you feel now?»

«Min, it was awful... It was like not being me...» his eyes are tearing again.

I still hold him: «My poor baby...»

I caress him for a while and then I take his face in my hands, wiping away the remaining tears: «Do you want to go back inside? Or do you want to leave?»

He looks towards the stadium: «We can't leave...» he complains.

«I don't mind. Just tell me what you wanna do, baby»

He looks at me and seems amazed: «Would you come away with me if I asked you?»

«Sure.» I nods.

"I'd even take you to the moon, if you asked me"

He keep observing my face. His eyes drift to my lips and for a second I miss a beat. 

Don't kid yourself, Minho, don't think about certain things now!

«That's enough for me.» he says, hinting a smile, «If I have you, I can do it. Let's go back.» he exclaims and seems to have come back to life. He gets up and wipes his pants.

I get up too and take his wrist: «Baby, I'm glad you feel better, but.. Are you sure you are okay? You scared me a lot...»

He gives me a cheeky smile: «Oh, so you were scared about me, Min?»

«I'm not joking, Han.» I snap, «But if you could be so sassy, I'm sure you are fine, little squirrel»

I slap his ass, making him laugh. He takes my hand and we go back to others. 

The day finally goes smoothly and it was fun too. I walk Han back to his room and keep him company during dinner, to make sure he was okay. He keeps laughing at my foolishness because, during the archery competition, I missed a shot, scoring 3 points and exulting ironically as if I had scored 10.

«You were so funny, Min» he laughs, leaning over on his stomach.

«Come on, stop teasing me! I know I'm sexy when I shoot» I add, with a wink.

«Oh, you surely are!» he mocks me, «However, how did you keep calling me today?» he asks me, with a catty smile.

«I don't know what are you talking about, Jagi» I say, pretending to be naive.

«I think you call me... 'baby'?» he says, laughing.

I laugh too: «Come on, you were so little, you know»

He nods and becomes more serious: «But, for real, Min, thank-»

«Please, don't thank me.»  I interrupt him, in a very serious tone. I don't want him to thank me for just be there.

«But...»

«I'm glad you let me help you this time. Please don't thank me.»

He sighs and nods.

«Can I at least hug you?» he asks, with soft eyes.

My God, how handsome he is. Even after a full sport day.

«You can hug me, you can kiss me, you can fuck-»

«Minho!» he shuts me up, laughing. I laugh too, while he gets up and approaches me.

«Just joking, I think I'm a top, anyway» I say, opening my arms to hug him.

He blushes and stamps his feet on the ground: «Minho, stop!» 

I laugh but nod and spread my arms again, to let him hold me. He sinks his face into my neck and hugs me warmly.

Wherever I am, in any position, in any uncomfortable chair, this is my favorite place to be: into his hug.

I feel at home, thanks to your smile, my baby.

And I hope it's the same for you too, Han.

. - . - . - .

Author's safe place:

Are you ready for LAST CHAPTER? The next one is the last, omg!! 

Hope you like this too!! 

I've to tell you 2 important things:

1. TW:  The 30th chapter will have some smut part inside, so if you are uncomfortable with it, just stop at the 29th or in the middle of 30th (because the first part of the chapter will be sooo cute!)

2. Next stories: would u like to read fan fiction where SKZ exist, like this one, or would u prefere first a story where they are just normal guys?

And do you prefere boy x boy or also boy with a female character? 

Thank u so much for all your support, it means too much for me!! 

I hope you will follow me here, waiting for others SKZ stories!!

If you want, I also have a huge tiktok account (straykids.fanfiction) where you can find video fanfictions and an ig profile for Stray Kids (straykids.fanfiction, just the same ahaha) where you can find some one shot and other stories.

L