Han Jisung p.o.v.

We are waiting for our exhibition at Weekly idol, a famous Korean YouTube program, and I'm fucking nervous.

The makeup artist is trying to retouch my makeup, but I can't stay still. My legs are shaking, even if I'm sitting on a chair, and I'm scratching my neck too much. It will turn red if I don't stop.

I perceive an hand on my thigh and I look up, crossing Lee Know's dark eyes.

He doesn't tell a word, he just smile kindly.

It seems that he is here, for me, and that his eyes are trying to remember me something important: you have always done good, Han, so you should not be too much worried.

I nod at his silent message and I calm down a bit. It's almost creepy how he manages to calm me down so quickly, it almost bothers me: why does he have all this influence over me?

«Guys, a lot of fan service today too, okay?»

I freeze, turning to the staff. They are remembering us that we are supposed to seem a couple for STAYs. We are something like friends, now, but it will be odd, no matter what. I think he really wouldn't like this kind of thing with me anyway, so I become tense as hell.

I watch him under my eyelashes, he just nods at the staff, without saying any word.

The show starts. The first part of the program is full of questions and I try to keep it cool when they ask us "Who you spent your free time with the most?"

I immediately point at Lee know and he points at me at the same time. It's not true, obviously, I hang out more with Jeongin and Felix or Changbin, but that's our Fan Service.

The MC asks us "Who is the most talented?" and Lee know immediately points at me again. I try not to blush in front of the camera. And that's hard, I swear.

«Oh, Lee Know is sure about his answer! Why did you choose Han?»

«He is our all rounded» he simply says. He's acting really good today.

I don't understand the smile Changbin gives me and I murmur a «Thank you so much».

Shit, I'm getting shy.

«Aww, Han is blushing! So cute!» the MC laughs. 

Ash, now I would like to disappear into the floor. But it's okay, the scene will be cute for our STAYs.

After the interview we have to dance, playing the "Random play dance" game. One of our song will start from the middle and we should immediately perform the right choreography.

We had already played at this game months ago, but we lost. This time we seem to be good at it, but obviously I make a mistake.

I automatically watch Lee Know, trying to understand if he is disappointed. He doesn't look at me at all, but he seems annoyed.

Fuck.

The second tentative went good. But this time it was him, LeeFuckingDanceKingKnow, who made a mistake. And I swear, this is the first time he has missed a dance step.

Did he make it on purpose? For me?

Don't be silly, Han, he would never.

We finished to record this long show, we danced our new Title track and, fortunately, I did it well.

«Did you see? You learn the new choreo well» he tells me, while we are going to change, and I don't understand if it's a compliment to me as a student or to him as a teacher.

«I made a mistake...» I say, watching the floor. I'm afraid to cross his eyes and find that hateful look he often gave me.

«Me too, everybody makes mistakes» he simply smiles. I stand dumbfounded staring at his face for some seconds. 

«How could that happen?» I can finally say, «You've never failed a choreo!» I blur out, peering into his impassive face.

He frowns and bumps his eyes into mine.

«Are you trying to tell that I did it on purpose, Han?» he asks, with an evil grin, «Maybe for you?» 

He laughs at my astonished expression, it can probably be seen on my face that I actually thought so. For a moment he seems to come back to the usual asshole.

«Obviously not.» I snap and walk away, wounded. That hurts, more than I would have imagined.

I thought things would get better, after that day. 

You were wrong, Han, you were so stupid to think he would care about you.

He just hates you, he has always hated you.

Today we are on a shooting set for Cosmopolitan. We will also have an interview after that and now we are waiting on the set, already dressed and with our hair done.

I'm wearing a black leather outfit, blue contact lenses and a very intense makeup. I feel confident, strangely.

Chan is speaking with the manager, but I'm not paying attention to him because I'm sitting on the floor and in front of me Lee Know is joking with Jeongin and Hyunjin. 

«Yo» Changbin greets me, sitting next to me.

«Yo» I answer, without looking at him. I can't get my eyes off Lee Know.

His hair has a wet look, darker than usual. An outfit similar to mine wraps his body, because obviously the staff make sure we look matching.

Lee Know spanks the maknae, who just giggles: «Butt hunter as always!»

He laughs, pointing at the other member: «Come here, I know you like this» he jokes.

«No way!» Hyunjin snorts dramatically, but he's laughing too. 

I can't understand why Lee Know likes this kind of things, but for a moment I feel upset and I hope Hyunjin rejects him.

Lee Know gives him the "Do as I ask" look and he obediently turns, offering his butt. It seems that no one can say no to that sweet-faced, brusque-mannered boy. Nobody but me.

He spanks Hyunjin too and they all laugh, while the drama queen roll his eyes: «You are absurd, Minho-hyung!»

Why am I so annoyed?

I can't be jealous of a spank, right?

I can't be jealous of him, can I?

I'm just envious of their easy physical contact, maybe. Or I probably don't like the fact that everyone always does as he says.

«I know I'm handsome, but you are drooling, Han»

Lee Know is watching at me laughing and I blush abruptly. I was staring at him too much.

«Fuck you» I snort, quickly watching away.

The SKZ Talker camera is capturing us in this moment, so he comes to sit next to me and he affectionately messes up my hair. I want to push him away from me, he's really annoying, but instead I smile and I put my head over his shoulder for a fake cuddling moment.

I really don't like fan service at all.

My heart is pounding fast, his closeness agitates me and I don't understand if I'm angry or... What? Embarrassed?

My smile could be fake, but the emotions I'm feeling are not at all. I can't lie to myself.

«Thank you!» the cameraman thanks us and walks away. I immediately move, breathing a sigh of relief.

He gives me an irritated look: «You can breathe again, Han» he snaps and walks away.

I open my mouth astonished. Why the hell is he pissed off?

Finally we started the shooting and I tried to avoid him as much as I could. He tried to get near me and when they finally asked us who is the most handsome today, Lee Know said:

«Hanieee».

I blushed suddenly and I've been silent until the time has come for the interview. He's really good at acting, that confuses me and makes me very angry.

He has come near me, waiting for the show to start, and I'm trying to play it cool.

«So I am the most handsome today?» I joke, crossing his amazed gaze. I can be sassy too, dear Lee Know. «Were you drooling?» I add.

He becomes serious out of nowhere and his eyes darken.

«Han, we are friends, but please don't confuse fan services with the reality.» his tone is glacial and I seem to perceive it seep under my skin. 

He leaves me like that. He leaves me hurt, again.

And this time I can't hold back a tear.

Han, what were you think?

He is always Minho, he couldn't transform from a frog to a prince in a week.

. - . - . - .

Author safe place

Don't hate me for the late and also for this rude chap ahahah

Next one is ready, I will publish it when I reach 10 stars/votes.

Ps. Thank YOU So much for 1000 views, I'm so happy!! 🥺🥺