A/N: Mature content (yep).

"Logan, I don't want to start over."

Just as my ugly cries started, fat rolling tears and congestion tickled in the inside of my nostrils, my eyes fixated on Logan's. Understandably, he looked completely crushed by my admission that I didn't want to start over with him.

I'm such a hot mess... Why am I even crying?

A tight tension coiled up the back of my neck as I curled over and rounded my spine. Harper had mentioned the possibility that I'd gotten emotional post-sex, how she knew that I had no idea but she was right.

My spine bristled and my skin tightened when Logan pressed one of his hands right into the middle of my upper back. Like a warm heating pad, the tension eased from both my neck and my mind. The thoughts that crashed into each other settled down after a few raspy but slower breaths.

With warmth in my cheeks and one turn towards Logan, both my hands cupped his face. As quickly as my mouth moved, I blurted out, "I want to pick up from here, not where we started, and not where we left off after we broke up. Together."

His gaze shifted the more my words soaked in, tension line by line dissolved and a brightness spread over him like a sunrise softly kissed his skin. By the time I sniffled away my congestion and puffed out a shaky exhale, a bright, beautiful smile spread across his face and his eyes sparkled like gemstones.

"Really?" With soft, gentle movements, his fingers dragged my tears off my cheeks. "Not to be an ass but why are you crying then?"

"I... don't know." My chin dipped downward to my chest at my admission, but I further pressed, "I... I'm sorry I didn't say this sooner."

My heart crumpled inward at the first word from his mouth, "Baby, you weren't ready."

"That's too kind." One of my eyebrows arched at him, which softened his smile. "I was a mess, I didn't think I had anything left in me that you wanted, or deserved, anymore. So I just.. quit after we broke up. Not just you, or us, but everything. I just... fell apart. Shut down. Broke down."

"Ellie, you were dealing with a lot then," he said softly as one of his hands trailed warmly down my bare arm. While there was nothing sexual about the touch, goosebumps raised up on my skin and a slight tremble quivered my lower lip.

"I never stopped thinking about you." I fixated my eyes on his. "Once we got here, it was a lot to take in... I handled things horrible and have no idea how you're still with me, but these are happy tears. And now I think... We should start from here and move forwards, if that's okay."

"I get it." His shoulders lifted slightly as he propped his chin in one palm. "I was here for a month waiting for you. I was shocked when I got the letters saying you were my roommate."

"Wait, you knew!?" My body tensed and I sat upright, fully aware when the sheet fell off me how both of us were completely naked. "This whole time you knew?"

"You didn't?" He ran his top hand up my arm, then gently held my elbow. "I got like three letters in the mail."

"No, I..." My voice faded as I assumed Mom's 'mailbox must've eaten it' interference must've factored into play. "It doesn't matter. I'm glad it happened."

"So you'll let me take you out tomorrow, after we're back from Arizona?" He gently squeezed my arm. "Second date?"

"I think we're past second date here." My eyes took in his broad, contoured chest and rippled abdominals as I averted my gaze from his. I lifted my hands down and rested them on the warm, soft skin stretched over his hard chest. As I pressed my palm over his heart space, I smiled when I felt the rushed beats that matched the ones that pounded in my ears.

"Your lead then, Ellie." The last thing I saw was a smile on his lips before I pressed mine against them. His hands grasped my waist and pulled me closer to him. My lips parted slightly, then I threaded my fingers behind his head into his hair.

A flush of warmth flooded into me and a burst of mint toothpaste zinged my taste buds as Logan opened his mouth with mine and brushed his tongue against my lower lip. I hesitated at my morning breath factor but by his movements, Logan couldn't have cared less.

With one push up with my bottom hand, I climbed over top of him, straddled his hips with my knees, then sat down on his muscular, furnace-temperature, bare thighs. With a look straight into his eyes and, for the first time in a long time, I spoke with absolutely no uncertainty or hesitation in my voice.

"Everything."

His eyebrows creased high into his forehead but the blue in his eyes deepened until they sparkled up at me. The rough pads of his fingers felt like tiny pieces of sandpaper stroked over the skin on my outer thighs while he echoed, "Everything?"

"All of it," I replied firmly with the hard set determination that felt like the cornerstone of my new foundation. "Will you... be my boyfriend, Logan?"

His lips rolled inward, then pressed into a firm line. A small frown reproduced the crease between his eyebrows and his voice sounded strained when he asked, "You ask me out, then this?"

"Yep," I replied flatly and gently palmed his chest. "I want all of it, starting from right here with you."

"All of it..." The slight waver in his voice revealed his masked true feelings, as did the sparkle that hadn't left his eyes since my word vomit started. With one tiny upward lift of his mouth corners, I knew I had him.

He apparently wanted none of this to be easy for me, possibly his bruised ego or payback for how I'd inadvertently yanked him around, but his hands traveled upwards along the outside of my legs, then rested on my hips. "Can you handle... all of it?"

"We both know who's carrying the baggage," I pointed out, then rolled my eyes because obviously he wasn't talking about our emotional relationship anymore. "And I didn't hear any complaints last night."

To prove my suspicion, I slid higher up onto the angular muscles of his quadriceps, then sank down onto the warm, hard erection I hadn't even needed a glance at. My outer folds parted slightly around his shaft and his tip sat right at my clitoris' parted entrance. I only needed one soft, gentle rock of my hips before his resolve completely broke.

"Okay, Ellie." His hands clamped tightly into my hips and stilled my movements, like I hadn't noticed and teased the hard, swollen penis right underneath me. "Made your point."

"I think you've made your point." I smirked and looked down at the soft, red mushroom shape that peeked out from between my legs.

"Think I can make two of them," he murmured and cupped his hands on the underside of my breasts. With circular strokes of his thumbs, my nipples tightened under his control and a satisfied smirk splayed all over his face. The frictioned contact, plus him wedged right up against my sensitive bundle of nerves, woke up the interest in me.

With one tilt of my hips, I leaned forwards and palmed his broad, hard pectoral muscles. The strong ridges of his abdomen clenched with definition under my movements and the wetness I know slicked over his shaft. "Logan... You're terrible sometimes."

"Ellie," he whispered and caressed the soft tissue in my breasts with his large palms. "I don't think you're playing fair here."

"Fine." I puffed out my cheeks then exhaled sharply. "Say it."

"I will, but first... Are you, uhh... Okay?" His eyes dropped down to where our pelvises met, then lifted back to mine absent of any teasing and full of a concern that squeezed my heart around itself.

Even if that's not what I asked, still really sweet of him.

The tenderness in his voice and how my chest tightened in response reinforced how easily Logan pushed me into Ellie goo status again when he asked, "Down there... I didn't hurt anything last night, did I?"

"Why don't you give it a second test drive and see for yourself?" My hips flexed, which rubbed my folds along his still-hard shaft.

"Ellie." Tension from his fingers in my hips and the grimace that tugged his mouth indicated he wanted an honest answer, so I stilled my movements.

"No," I assured him with a smile. "A few slight aches but nothing like before. It felt... really good."

"I'm glad." A ghost of a smile flinched across his lips. "It was... good."

"Say it like that and you won't get any more." My forehead tensed when my eyebrows drew together and I moved to roll off him, but he grasped my hips and tugged me down.

My eyes tracked one of his hands, which lowered, palmed the bed under his pillow, then stayed there while he sat up with me on his lap. His other hand's palm caressed the line of my jaw, while his thumb rubbed softly over my left cheek.

"One of the best experiences of my life." His soft, almost wistful voice, flipped on my Ellie-goo switch, but then his smirk took control of his expression again. "So, let's do it again. And again."

"I appreciate the digression, but you didn't answer me," I reminded him with both my eyebrows arched. "What do you want?"

"Just you." He extended his back hand towards me, dropped a cool, hard objection into my palms, then squeezed both of my hands into shut fists. "I want you to be... My Ellie."

"I already am," I confessed as a no doubt goofy smile spread across my lips.

"Sounds like a promise." He flashed me an adorable grin. "And you're okay with all the pain in the ass attention that comes with being my girl?"

When he says it like that, I want everything that comes along with being his girl.

The view of him under me and how his eyes trained on mine shifted as I nodded slightly. "If you promise to be okay with how I'm an emotional hot mess sometimes."

"Promise." Once he returned my nod and dropped his gaze to my clenched hands, my fingers uncurled and my breath froze in my lungs at the sight of the round, platinum ring he'd handed me, on a long silver chain. The tiny flash of light reflected along the silver-colored band melted me from the inside out.

Not just any ring... My ring.

My earlier snooping in his drawer hadn't helped here and I sat completely impassive while I stared at the ring like it wasn't right here in my hands. Not a single muscle or tendon in my body flinched.

Am I supposed to be surprised to see it?

"Too soon?" Logan slightly cringed at my reaction, so I just placed one hand on the center of his chest.

"No..." I lowered my lashes, dipped my chin downward, then slipped the necklace back to where it belonged. The ring, full of all of Logan's promises, spoken and unspoken, fell down right in between my breasts and drew his eyes there. "I think it's perfect timing."

"There's one condition." The blue in his eyes brightened and his gaze heated and intensified the longer he looked at my ring. My lips pulled into a wide smile since I had a good idea what thoughts ran through his dirty mind, and I couldn't have been more wrong when he blurted out, "Sleep in my bed, make it our bed."

"You sure?" While I was sure how I slept on the sofa probably gave off another mixed signal, intimacy wasn't the reason behind that choice. My lower lip rolled under my teeth when I admitted, "You won't sleep well. I'm a pretty... restless sleeper. This place isn't big enough for me to hide from your sleep-deprived wrath."

"Yep," he replied firmly with an extra squeeze of his hands into my hips for emphasis. "Every night, so I see you every morning."

After a few moments where my index finger tapped over my lips and I pretended the answer laid on the ceiling where I gazed, I locked my eyes on his again. "I can work with that, but reserve the right to call you out on your grumpiness."

No part of him showed an ounce of concern and his voice wrapped confidence around his curt response, "Good."

"Good." I sealed my agreement with another grind into his pelvis.

His shoulders tensed at the frictioned contact, but his smirk slightly faded. "And if things get... grumpy on your end, please try not not to push me away. We talk things through again."

"I'll definitely try to work on that." I made my own promise, then threaded my index finger through the ring and lifted it off my skin. "I remember saying we'd have a redo with me only wearing this. And I'm definitely not wearing socks right now."

"Like this?" His eyes shifted down to our close proximity hips.

"Have you done this position?" My lips twitched at that mental idea, then relaxed once he shook his head slowly.

"Only like last night, or... from behind," he mumbled the last part quietly, almost like he was embarrassed by that admission.

"Good..." I pushed off him, walked over to his dresser, and retrieved a condom. Even though I tossed it onto his bare chest, I reminded him, "You know I'm on birth control and completely clean, right?"

"I'm clean too," he said over the soft crinkle of opened plastic. "It's only been you since... well you. My clean test results are on my phone but I didn't want to push things too quickly."

"Appreciate that." I stepped back onto the bed and straddled his hips again once he'd rolled the condom on. My lower lip tucked under my teeth at his large, muscular frame under me and what I attempted to do with it. "I've never done this, so... might not be very good."

"Ellie, if you saw my view, it's already the sexiest wakeup since..." His voice faded and an adorable, slight flush of pink spread across his cheeks.

"Since when?" I demanded because rarely Logan got embarrassed about anything.

"Since you woke me up in the hotel for our visit here." He chuckled quietly.

Of course he'd say that about a morning wake up blow job.

"We'll just take it slow, lift your hips," he offered, reached down between us, then positioned up his sheathed penis. "Climb over me, part your folds, then sit down on my cock. Go as slow and deep as you need or want to. Or don't want. You're in charge."

"I'm in charge?" I giggled softly at that idea.

"Been pretty bossy today," Logan scoffed but the playful sparkle had returned in his eyes. A flush of encouragement flowed through me as he held out his sheathed penis to me, like an offering.

One I'll gladly take.

"I'll show you bossy." I knelt over his pelvis, spread my lower lips open, then nudged my entrance against his tip. With a slow, uneven movements, I sat down on his tip and descended at a rate that felt awkward and slightly intrusive. Once I bottomed up, my insides felt stretched wider from this angle, so I sat on his pelvis for a moment of adjustment. The penetration was deeper for sure, he felt like he'd almost poked up into my stomach.

"You okay?" He breathed out under me, which grabbed my attention to the near tortured look on his face. His cheeks were red strained, his mouth pulled into a tight line, and a vein popped out on the side of his strained neck.

"Yeah..." I whispered then realized I had no idea what I was doing and almost laughed at my awkwardness here. "Guess we'll just play it by... rear."

"Feels amazing so far," he grumbled with a controlled restraint and clenched his hands into fists at his sides, the sight of which encouraged me further. "You're tightly squeezing me everywhere."

With a slight lift, I slipped myself up his length, then slid back down until my butt brushed against his lap. He released a slow, almost tortured grunt and a slight crease in his jaw appeared. His fingers twitched like he wanted to touch me, but then he pressed them into his sides and propped himself up slightly onto his elbows.

I braced my palms flat onto his chest and lifted and lowered a few times, over and over with sloppy, jerked movements at first, but by the strained look on Logan's face, his enlarged pupils, he had no complaints so far. His eyes tracked over my body, from where ours met together, over the curves in my hips, waist, and ribs, and definitely spent most of their attention on my breasts. The attention of his gaze on me warmed my skin, which empowered me further.

With a sense of emboldenment, I shifted forwards onto my knees, then lifted and lowered my hips while flexing them inward and rolling them back so I curved along his shaft. From this angle, his tip pushed along my inner wall and lit off sparks of arousal inside me. I lowered myself down to his base, where the contact of his balls rubbed against the bottom of my clitoris and rubbed a line of friction we both groaned at.

"Just like that, baby. Can I touch you?" Logan groaned out at one point and as soon as I nodded, his hands shot up and he laid his head flat back on the bed.

I'd thought he'd have gone right for my breasts but instead his hands gripped into my hips, where his long fingers pressed tightly into my skin and guided my movements into an even rhythm up and down his shaft. After we found a steady thrust motion together, his hands lowered, he tucked his hands behind his head like he reclined in a hammock, and smirked up at me.

"Challenge accepted..." I murmured, spread my knees wider, lengthened my movements up and down his shaft until his tip almost came out, then dropped down slightly harder. While my body responded with increased excitement, I also definitely felt the extra workout factor as my breaths turned into hot pants and perspiration beaded up behind the back of my knees.

The harder I pumped my hips, Logan's abdominal muscles clenched with definition and his cocky expression faltered slightly. He pushed down his hands, then sat halfway up until my breasts skimmed over the warm, smooth skin on his broad, hard pillow-like pectorals. At the closer proximity, I clamped my palms down onto his shoulders.

"Logan," I groaned in a low voice as my hands squeezed into the sides of his hips.

"Challenge challenged," he murmured against my lips then kissed me hard. The warm, rough contact stirred the pool of arousal my movements had built up, then the extra micro-shift upwards of his hips while he met me thrust-for-thrust while his tongue massaged against mine kicked everything into overdrive.

"You feel -" I panted my words out before his lips claimed mine again. With each thrust, my pelvis arched into his, my toes tightened, and my fingers dug into the hard skin on his shoulders.

With a sharp inhale, Logan gently pulled back and I melted at the storm that raged behind his bright blue irises and how his lips parted and released a few hot, ragged breaths. His face wrenched into a tense, pleasured expression and by the tightening, squeezing feelings I felt inside my core area, I knew he felt what built up between us.

"Fuck, Ellie," he muttered in a low tone. "You feel amazing, I love you."

His words froze my breath in the bottom of my lungs. "I..."

My nipples skimmed over his chest as my breasts jiggled slightly from the increased movements, then Logan's hands clasped around them gently. From how his fingers kneaded into my breasts to his mouth's movements against mine and the deep thrusts against my inner wall, a hot coil of arousal tightened and tensed inside my pelvis.

My breaths turned short and sharp and my insides squeezed tighter around Logan's shaft with increased pressure. Our movements switched to sloppy, deep thrusts against each other, hands clutched tightly, and the only sounds between us were from slicked skin that slapped against skin, pants, and soft moans between us. My high crashed first, followed shortly by a deep groan, then sharp exhale from Logan while he came.

"Shit, Ellie..." He pulled back from kissing me, a slight sheen of perspiration on his brow line but a deep, intense look in his eyes. His penis softened inside me but he made no exit movements, just leaned forwards and hugged his arms around me. My palms, just as sweaty as his back, heaved with his breaths as I sat on his lap.

My shoulder vibrated once he spoke. "That was... wow."

"It was..." My chest heaved for breath and I rested my forehead into his shoulder, where I hugged him gently. A soft smile played on my lips before I pressed them against the warm skin on his chest, right over his heart space, then whispered, "Everything."