I slept rough, and that's an understatement. Living the life I had wanted so bad was nothing it was cracked up to be. And now we were supposed to be taking down a ninja type badass. I wanted to quit. Even the fact that I was thinking about the killing made me want to call TNT or Lifetime and turn myself in. At least those networks would put the spin on it so I looked like the victim.

I picked at my breakfast and got dressed which was becoming harder and harder. My belts didn't have holes small enough and my scoop tops slid over my bone protruding shoulder. I wished I was a stress eater, at least then I'd feel like I was punishing myself by restricting. As it was I couldn't force food down, I was way too stressed out. I did put kiki's make up tips to good use and my face looked flawless though gaunt. Maybe Tiffani would give me a break.

School was a monotone blur of hormone infused teens squealing about daily dribble and drama. If normal people ever knew what was happening at the top they would thank their lucky stars for problems like boys spending too much time at practice and girlfriends acting bitchy.

Since falling in with Tiffani and the robot girls, the junior girls in my classes stared at me and made room when I walked down the hall. It's like suddenly I became proof that breaking out was possible. A few followed me around and offered to do my homework and take my notes, no doubt lining up to be my robots next year when I lead a pack.

Little did they know I was pretty sure that was never going to happen. I'd either be in jail or dead by next year. And both actually sounded less stressful. Tiffani snagged me out of sixth hour before class was finished and all eyes watched me as I picked up my books and headed to the door. Mr. Brooks didn't even question it, he just nodded and continued watching the pbs miniseries on Pearl Harbor we had been watching for the last two weeks.

When we got to Tiffani's each of us had a blue box with a silver bow waiting on her bed. The robots eyes glazed over and fingers grabbed the boxes like a Bruce Lee movie on fast play. My hand reached out slower, as if I were moving through syrup.

As we opened the box I plastered a smile on my face to avoid Tiffani's scorn. We waited in a line so she could explain the gift and the very hefty price attached.

"Alright cumquats, it's time to plan the party. And I use that line as a metaphor because of course I have a party planner who isn't an idiot and unlike you, will make the event flawless."

Mindy giggled and Tiffani shot her a death glare causing her to drop her blue box. When it hit the floor the lid came off and the charm toppled onto the pink shag carpet. The silver dress with tiny diamond chips shimmered in the light and the room was so silent I could hear Mindi's left nostril squeak.

"What did I tell you, you're idiots. Pick up the charm. Hold out your wrists. Never mind the amazing speech I worked on. I knew someone was gonna screw it up."

We took out our charms and stood with our arms out like refugees getting a wristband as Tiffani fastened each dress on a silver circle of the bracelet next to the dangling heart.

"Gather round goats, it's story time. Aria, there's a shake in the table. Drink it. You look like crack spit you back in the gutter because you were too pathetic for it to waste time with."

I walked to the dresser and picked up the icy stein with the thick chocolate shake. Everyone was silent as I sucked through the straw using every bit of muscle I owned to get a drop. It was cool and smooth and delicious and my face betray me by lighting up with a smile.

Suddenly the world seemed to slow down, and my head stopped spinning. I felt a little like I'd had alcohol but without the spinning. Tiffani nodded and I went back to the shoe chair to listen.

"One of my favorite urban legends is about a dress. A poor girl wanted to go to a dance (they all do, which is why we charge so much for dances, no one wants to be sad there). Her uncle worked for a funeral home and knew she didn't have anything to wear. That day someone famous was found dead in her bed and when the body came in he noticed her dress, a vintage silk, was the perfect size and shape for his niece. Being a horrible person but a sweet uncle he stole the dress and gave it to his niece."

For some reason the story was so interesting to me it's all I could do to wait for the end. I raised my hand. "Why was she wearing a dress in bed? And how did she die?"

Tiffani shot me a glare. "Just listen to the story slut. If everyone asks questions now I'll never get to the point!"

I tucked my hands under my thighs and the words "I'm sorry" slipped out of my mouth like butter. What the hell was happening to me? I drank more of the shake and patiently waited for the rest of the story.

"The niece loves the dress and much like Cinderella (minus the ending where she becomes rich and gets a Prince) it fits her like a glove. At the dance someone asked her to dance and as they played some stupid 1980's song the girl starts feeling horrible. She turns pale and her nose starts bleeding and she sweats like a beer drinking bowler having sex. Which grosses out the boy and he puts the girl on a bus where she dies. When the uncle gets the body the next day, he recognizes his hideous niece and it turns out the dress is a murder weapon and someone had covered the inside seams with poison. So essentially, the idiot funeral uncle killed his niece by trying to class her up and send her to a dance where she didn't belong."

Mindi clappered her hands with excitement. "So we have to get Micah's uncle a job at a funeral home? "

Even I couldn't believe how stupid that was, I broke out in hysterical laughter and had to hold my side. Tiffani grabbed the milkshake and put it back on the dresser. I didn't even care, I was relaxed and in a bubble of comfort and suddenly very hungry.

"No moron. We make Micah want to wear a one of a kind dress. We sneak in and spread poison on the seams and when she gets hot at the party the poison seeps in her pores and kills her and we don't have to do a thing. The minute she feels sick we send her home though, I don't want her dying in my yard."

Tiffani hit the squawk box and Marta answered. "Make the girls some snacks and put on ID network."

The girls lined up and I tried to fix my legs to stand but somehow they were like rubber. I tried several attempts and nothing worked. My face felt plastic and my mouth felt dry but drool slipped from a corner.

Tiffani stood above me. "Whoops. You actually weigh less than I thought you did. Now that's surprising. I may have overdosed you just a smidge. Sleep it off, I think you should be fine. But if you feel like your going to die please crawl next door, I can't be associated with deaths this year or my dad sends me to boot camp. As if."

With that she clicked off the light and followed the girls down the stairs.

**********************
Before you panic, remember I'm the one writing this, so obvs I didn't die. But I am in a mess, and Tiffani is off the chart cray cray. No matter how much I want to kill her I do give props for that dress urban legend. I went home and read it and although her spin on it was ridic, it's a great story.