Chapter Six

Seeing Sheena in so much pain was killing me, especially knowing there was nothing I could do to help her. As she gripped hold of me she began pushing, hearing her scream out in pain was tearing me apart. I kept telling her how much I loved her, but it made no difference. As she pushed one final time our baby was born, there are no words on this earth to explain how I am feeling. I watched as the under cover officer wrapped our baby in a sheet; it was so overwhelming I couldn’t stop the tears. I waited to hear our baby cry for the first time but there was nothing; I looked down at Sheena to see she was looking worried too. Then there was the most magical sound ever our baby’s first cry. Leaning down I kissed Sheena she was crying too, I have her back and there is no way I will every let her disappear again never, I said to myself.

 Hearing a heart wrenching scream coming from Sheena I looked back down at her and then to the officer, the look on his face alone had panicking. I looked down to where the doctor was looking, it was horrifying, and Sheena was loosing so much blood. Staring at the puddle on the floor, the blood continued to pore out of her it was petrifying.Tearing my eyes away I looked up at Sheena, her face had turned a ghostly white and her lips where going blue. A cold shiver ran through my body as I watched her. Her eyes were pleading with me, I knew what she needed, and I knew that she knew that this wasn’t going, as it should be. ”Damon, we’re losing her, we need the paramedics NOW!”  The officer shouted bringing me out of shock. Sheena was freezing and was barely breathing; I could see her struggling keeping her eyes opened. I knew what she wanted but seeing the defeat in her eyes was unbearable, and I didn’t want to give in because then I was giving her a reason to give up.

Watching Sheena slip away while holding our baby was like being stabbed in the heart by a knife repeatedly. I wasn’t ready to loose her not now not ever. I felt completely empty as I watched her slip away, her hold on our princess loosened and although I felt numb and frozen, I still managed to hold our baby. I started to scream out hoping she would hear me, but there was no response. The paramedics came running into the room the officer was giving her CPR, my vision was so blurry I was loosing sight of my Sheena. I looked down at our baby as Lee tried to take her away. ”No don’t touch her, I can’t loose her.” I shouted out to Lee. He left our baby go and grabbed hold of me. ”Damon listen they need more room you need to move back and let them do there job” Lee said while trying to move me. Looking down at my baby I gave her a kiss before handing her over to Lee, I wasn’t ready to give up on Sheena she had to live we need her. As soon as Lee took our princess away, I started to scream at Sheena. “Sheena you can’t leave us baby we need you, God damn it Sheena fight please baby fight for us. I felt her hand trying to squeeze mine but she was so weak, but knowing she hadn’t completely left us yet gave me hope. “One- two- three CLEAR” I heard someone shout and then I fell back onto the floor. The room had gone silent only the sound of a machine giving us a flat line sound was heard. “AGAIN PLEASE TRY AGAIN” I pleaded desperately to the paramedic. He looked at me with so much defeat, “time of death six fifty-eight pm,” hearting them I had to cut them off, ”NO please, please try once more please.” I begged with all my heart and soul, crying hysterically I watched as the doctor pressed charge on the machine, I wiped my eyes and as he shouted  clear “SHEENA I LOVE YOU” I screamed out hoping that if  she hears me she will fight harder. I listened out closely for a heartbeat a beep anything, “Damon I’m so sorry,” the paramedic said. I closed my eyes I didn’t want to see this I didn’t want to believe that my one and only was dead. With my eyes closed tight I could hear our baby princess crying in the silence then out of know where the machine started to beep, “We have a heart beat, get her out of here now” hearing the excitement in  the paramedics voice had me jumping up off the ground. “Sheena, Oh god Sheena stay with us that’s my girl fight like you always do, you can do this I know you can.” I told her honestly. My heart beat speed up as they pulled an oxygen mask over her face and the beeping of her steady heartbeat had me roaring. Taking my baby princess back into my arms Lee followed me down the stairs. I could hear the paramedics shouting orders as they carried her down the stairs on the stretcher. They had managed to stop her bleeding temporally but needed to move fast.

The whole drive to the hospital was unbearable as I listened to the sound of her heartbeat, I although it was faint it was there and right now, as long as her heart was beating then we still had a chance. Our baby was silent it was like she was listening to her mothers heart as well. I leaned in closer to Sheena and rested our baby’s head against hers; right now, it was the perfect vision that I had been praying to have for mouths now. My Princess, my soon to be wife and me.

As soon as we arrived at the hospital, I was pulled away from Sheena as they took her straight into surgery. I watched frozen as they push her through the big double solid doors. All I could do was watch and hope that she would make it. Lee led me into the waiting room where a midwife was waiting for us. I was grateful for her not just taking my princess off me because right now she was the only person that was helping me to hold it together. Because knowing that Sheena would probably kill me right now if anything happened to our princess.

What felt like hours had passed by and Sheena was still in surgery and I still hadn’t heard anything. Feeding our princess was amazing; she was so small and beautiful just like her mother. The midwife helped me the whole time, while Lee and Cherelle went looking for any information they could get. My eyes where so heavy, I was beyond tired but I couldn’t let myself fall asleep. I needed to stay awake, as I wanted to be the first to see Sheena when she gets out of surgery. I needed to be the first person she sees when she wakes up. “Damon” hearing Cherelle calling me brought me out of my inner thoughts. “She is still in surgery,” Cherelle said through her sobs. I nodded my head. I could hear Cherelle talking with Lee and although she was keeping it low, I could still hear her. Hearing her last question to Lee had me panicking as I had been blocking that same question from my head all night, “Is Sheena going to make it”.

I couldn’t stop the tears from falling as I thought of the what ifs, I needed to get away from here I needed air. Quickly getting up I handed the baby to the midwife and told her I will be straight back. She took my princess and snuggled her into her chest, just watching her hold our baby like that had me running. It should be Sheena holding her right now with a big smile on her face and happy tears falling from her sparkling blue eyes, not some stranger.

I ran through all the corridors until I reached I exit, I ran around the back of the hospital to the gardens for the patients. Taking a seat on one of the benches, I screamed and screamed, relishing all my frustration, anger betrayal and most of all heartache. The last year has been like a roller coaster of a nightmare only this nightmare is real so real that I wish I could just wake up and everything would be ok. That Sheena, me and our baby where sitting in the hospital room with balloons and flowers everywhere and cards from all my friends down at the station. Cherelle, Sheena chatting and laughing as she stares at our princess adoringly. Knowing that is all she wanted killed me, because everything Sheena ever wanted was to be loved and I couldn’t even do that right. I was feeling so angry with myself, because I should have never stopped looking that first night or the second I should have just carried on searching in the dark and then maybe she wouldn’t be here right now. Just maybe we would be sat at home watching the TV cuddling, god how I wish I could turn back time and make everything right. ”Damon quick she’s out of surgery,” Lee shouted out panting. I leaped off the bench and ran as fast as I could back towards the waiting area. The surgeon was looking at our baby with a big smile across his face, “How is she?” I said panting and panicking. “Everything went well; however, we will know more in the next twenty-four hours, as our main concern now is the amount of time her brain was deprived of oxygen”. His facial expression alone gave me so much hope that I jumped on him and hugged him. “Thank you so much for everything,” I said through tears that I didn’t even realise I had. I knew the risks he spoke of but I didn’t care, because she was going to live and that meant the world to me. If I will have to take care of her the rest of my life, so be it. Nothing will ever stop me from loving and caring for her and knowing I still have her is everything I could of whished for.

Hoped you all enjoyed

I’m sorry about late and shorter uploads :(

However, like always I will make it up to you all

All my love and appreciation Mel x

P.S Just to let you all know everything is going well and things will be back to normal real soon please god :)