Leroy Jeremy Cox was born on 13th August 2004 and, to the horror of Annabelle Cox, could wield a kitchen knife by the age of two without parental guidance. For all intents and purposes, he was cursed by the culinary gods above to possess the intuition of a master chef meant for greatness. And yet, here he is lounging beside myself in the most awful posture that could only be described as a cross between an afternoon nap and intoxicated state, watching a basketball match whilst enjoying his microwaved omelet-in-a-mug. As aforementioned; a certified idiot.

Such a mind was capable of thinking up recipes at the snap of his fingers and execute said intentions with observed speed and fluidity, leaving guests in awe of his talent from a ripe young age. Once, he'd mentioned something along the lines of looking in front of him for motivation. Admittedly, I'd somehow dubbed the phrase ingenious back then but with the advantage of time and reflection, now think it absolutely stupid.

Culinary ventures require no motivation. Should you be unmotivated, so be it. Food can wait. In fact, it will. Do not be foolish in your attempts to impress someone you'd like to impress. Unfortunately, the author of this book will make several attempts to deviate your opinion from mine and it is to my horror that I cannot edit such authenticity. Oh he is a fool. A criminal.

A genius. An incredible talent. A flame.

Just, not a chef.

Editor

V. J. White