A few days ago, as I was browsing through various book reviews in an attempt to decide on a new book to read, I came across the highly-raved autobiographical novel I Don't Like This World, I Only Like You written by new C-Novelist Joey. Joey recounts in the book how her husband (Mr. F) and her met, how they subsequently separated, how they eventually reunited, and finally married each other. The novel is a simple read, and leaves its readers with a faint taste of happiness after its conclusion. Notably, the format of the book is not in chronological order, but in small anecdotes meant to illustrate or highlight particular incidents.

Rating: ★★★★★

Synopsis:

The night before we obtained our marriage certificate, I asked him, "When did you start to develop feelings for me?"

He answered, "I don't remember."

"But, why me?"

"Why not you?"

"I'm very petty, and I get jealous very easily."

"So am I."

"I'm afraid I'm not worthy of you."

"So am I."

"I haven't really dated, so I don't know what is love."

"I don't know either."

He held my hand gently, "But I know this. When I think about spending the rest of my life with you, I feel that my future is filled with hope."

At 16 we used the same class desk, with less than 10cm between our arms. My peripheral vision was full of him.

At 26, I woke up in the morning, and saw the sunlight softly shining on his face. I thought, this is how I want to grow old – gradually, together, with him.

I guess this must be love.

In this first chapter of I Don't Like This World, I Only Like You, we are introduced to the hilarious Joey and her sweet, taciturn husband Mr. F. As mentioned previously, the book is written in such a way that allows the readers to get glimpses of Joey and Mr. F's daily lives. This chapter is presently split into two parts, so as to allow for easier reading and translating.

Chapter 1: This is What it Feels Like to Date a Male Capricorn

001

Last year, when Mr. F was on a business trip to Japan, I discovered a thread online titled "Sisters, how do you guys normally tease your boyfriends through text messages?". The answers in the thread were hilarious to say the least.

Coincidentally, I had just changed my mobile number that day. As such, I sent Mr. F an anonymous message: "Hey Big Boss, do you need any special services?"

He didn't reply.

I persevered in my efforts, sending him yet another text message: "Little lonely wild cat has a fiery and burning passion, and will be delivered to your doorstep. Satisfaction guaranteed."

After a while, he called me. On picking up the phone, the first sentence he said was, "Are you very bored at home?"

I was extremely shocked, "How did you know it was me?"

He said, "Only you would be bored enough to pull such a stunt." He paused momentarily, thinking before continuing, "I'll be returning the day after tomorrow."

"So soon? Aren't you only scheduled to return next week?"

"Sudden change in plans."

Sometime afterward, his colleague came over to our house for dinner. The conversation naturally turned to the recent Japan trip, and the colleague said, "Mr. F didn't even attend the celebratory dinner. The moment his work ended he rushed to the airport without a moment's delay, claiming that there was nobody at home and he had to return to take care of the cat."

He surveyed our surroundings, and asked out of curiosity, "Speaking of which... where's the cat?"

I flushed immediately. Mr. F placed a piece of fish in my bowl, and replied calmly without a change in expression, "It's easily scared and is afraid of strangers."

I wanted to bury my face in the bowl.

002

Mr F. was always an extremely stern and proud person in front of outsiders. As such, people often referred to him as Ice Man. Conversely, I was the exact opposite. As an experienced lunatic, I had a burning passion for acting, and Mr. F always tells me off by claiming that it was a pity that I haven't pursued an acting career.

Once, while we were eating out, I suddenly stopped and told him seriously, "Brother-in-law, how can we face our sister after what we have done?"

Initially, he would, along with the waiter, stare at me with a thunderstruck expression. However, he gradually got used to it over the years, and even managed a calm reply yesterday – "I'm sure your sister give us her blessings from Heaven."

There was one time when I was suddenly struck by inspiration, and I told him enthusiastically that I wanted to act as the lovestruck and loyal second male lead.

I managed to meld into my role fairly quickly, and roared at him, "I am the one who loves Joey the most! I will never let you have her!"

He leaned against the bookshelf, browsing through his book cursorily whilst managing a halfhearted reply, "Take her then."

I was stunned – according to the script, the story should not have unfolded in such a manner.

I continued, "I'm going to take her away tonight, and leave you forever!"

He snapped the book shut in an instant, and said coldly, "Try taking her away – if she dares to leave with other people, I'll break her leg."

Kao! Who authorised you to change the script!

003

The neighbours living above us had commenced renovation, causing each day to be filled with incessant loud noises. As such, I decided to book a room in a hotel in an attempt to find some peace when writing.

At night, Mr. F arrived to deliver my dinner. My two eyes shone brightly and I asked him mischievously, "Doesn't this feel like we're having an affair?"

He glared at me severely.

Who could have predicted that on entering the room, this man would start to disrobe immediately? I asked him what he was doing.

He replied me with a serious expression on his face, "Hurry up, my wife ends work at 5PM."

004

When returning from a business trip, I received a telephone call from my best friend at the airport. She had just experienced a breakup and was crying uncontrollably. Dragging my luggage, I met up with her for drinks.

It's often said that a long-lasting relationship is an anomalous phenomenon; it's akin to a treasure that descended from heaven, and is simply extravagant to hope that it's like the distribution of lunch boxes at lunch time in that the moment lunchtime arrives, everybody will manage to get one set.

On returning home, I felt particularly melancholic, and hugged Mr. F tightly. "My luck has always been rather bad; the only lucky thing that happened in my entire life is my meeting you, so I'm extremely grateful for our relationship. Having grown so old, the one and only thing that I have relentlessly persevered in is loving you."

He replied, "Yup, I'm touched you think this way." He paused, "But don't think that just because you said this I'll forgive you for returning home at 3AM in the morning."

He glared sternly at me, and headed to the kitchen to brew a cup of honey for me to help me neutralize my alcoholic drinks.

005

I am a chatterbox, and I often ramble relentlessly to his ears. One day, I asked him rather abruptly, "Do you feel that I'm extremely long-winded?"

He was driving then, with his eyes glued to the road ahead. He replied me expressionlessly, "Yeah, pretty long-winded."

I was slightly unhappy – so he has been feeling annoyed by me all this while.

He broke into a smile, and said, "I have to listen to your long-winded speeches my whole life anyway. It's fine since I'm used to it."

006

We were high school classmates. When he was studying, he was exactly like how he is now – although he appeared to be extremely cool on the surface with a poisonous tongue, he had an extremely good heart within. Subsequently, because of various incidents, coupled with our immaturity at that point in time, we severed our friendship.

He went to England to study, and we lost contact for many years. During one of our class reunion dinners, someone mentioned that he had previously dialed Mr. F's old number by accident and surprisingly, the call actually managed to connect. It was then that I realized that Mr. F had kept his original number all these years.

"But isn't it very inconvenient for him, since he is staying overseas?"

Nobody could understand why Mr. F chose to retain his original number, but the final conclusion we reached was that the mind of a great genius is not something we mere mortals can possibly understand.

Not long afterward, Mr. F's birthday arrived. I mustered sufficient courage to send him a text message, hugging my phone throughout the night. But there was no reply. On the second day, he finally replied, with a very distant and courteous phrase – "Thank you."

When he subsequently returned to China, I brought a body solely filled with courage and travelled to Beijing to look for him. There, we made up and decided to be together. One day, whilst rifling through his bookshelf, I found the Nokia N97 that he used in the past. I turned it on – the call history and messages were all deleted, and only the draft folder for text messages had anything left. Out of curiosity, I clicked it. There were more than ten draft messages inside the folder.

Today, I met a girl at ASDA who looked like you.

Paul came out with a new album, and it feels like you're sitting right next to me when I listen to his songs.

The weather has grown colder in Changsha, so remember to keep warm and wear more clothes.

I forgive you, so please give me a call.

...

The final message was: I really miss you.

The time of the message was his birthday.

n this post, we finish up with Part 2 of Chapter 1 of I Don't Like This World, I Only Like You. An especially poignant scene that I particularly liked was the scene with Grandmother, as it truly showed how gentle Mr. F really is, even to people who are not Joey. We've seen scenes of him being snarky and being sweet, and attentiveness just adds to his overall attractiveness and charisma. I liked that Joey showcased a more steely side of herself in this chapter, something we don't get to see very often in this book, as this book mostly focuses on her interactions with Mr. F, wherein she tends to show more of her softer, cute and "weak" side.

Chapter 1: This is What it Feels Like to Date a Male Capricorn

007

Last year, our company conducted a programme in a relatively rural mountainous area. Stuck in the crowd, I was shoved and fell onto the ground. My legs struck a rock in the process, and stars appeared before my eyes. My colleague helped me up, asking me whether I felt okay. I crawled up and dusted the dirt off myself. I told him that I was fine – two plasters would suffice.

It was only when I returned that I discovered that half of my pants were soaked in blood. I hobbled to the infirmary, where the doctor informed me that I had to stitch my wound. However, there was no anesthetic presently. As we had to continue with the programme the next day, we could not afford any delays. Thus, I grit my teeth and told the doctor to go ahead.

I endured the pain obstinately, refusing to make even a single sound. My colleague – a man 1.8m tall from Northeast China – watched on the sidelines, his eyes reddening during the process. He told me that he had nothing but genuine respect for me.

I was rather abashed, and said, "This is nothing. When I was young I had an operation once – and even though the pain was a hundred times worse then, I managed to endure it."

Mr. F came to pick us up when we returned to Beijing. I knocked out the moment sat in the car, only rousing halfway during the journey to hear my colleague chatting with him, claiming that if I had bee born a few decades earlier, I would definitely have been Liu Hulan.

"Is she this strong even at home?"

Mr. F replied, "No. She loves to whine at home, and she frequently cries when she watches movies, to the point where I have to comfort her as though she's still a child."

My colleague was bewildered, "Why?"

"Because she doesn't have to be strong in front of me."

Listening to their conversation silently, I felt myself tear up.

I saw a line in a book once, and it left a deep impression on me then. It said that during one's lifetime, one can find love, and one can find sex, but these are unimportant things. What's important is that one finds understanding.

I thought, ah, this must be understanding.

008

The company wanted to plan an event relating to the reminiscence of youth.

I sent a mass text message to my friends, asking: The person who you crushed on when you were studying – what is he or she doing now?

I received various answers:

He became the father of other children.

He married, and gave birth to children. I dreamt of him last night, and even in the dream he was as nonchalant and dismissive as ever. No matter how hard I try, I can never catch up with his footsteps. I was very sad in the dream, because he didn't do anything wrong, it's just that he didn't love me.

When I was studying, I only loved my assessment books.

I read the answers slowly, and discovered that I had accidentally sent the message to Mr. F as well. However, I did not possess any hope that he'd reply as he generally tends not to reply these types of mass text messages.

We were engulfed with work during that period of time, and when I returned home it was already 11PM at night. He was even later than me. Whilst I was half-asleep, I felt him carefully making his way onto the bed and tucking my blanket in for me.

He was gone when I woke up the next morning. It was only when I arrived at the company that I discovered an unread message in my mobile phone. I opened it, and saw his answer:

She became my wife, and she's sleeping beside me right now.

2:45AM in the morning.

009

When I was dating Mr. F, I was rather unsure about the relationship. This, coupled with his extremely obstinate nature, resulted in me continuously being the first to apologize and make amends whenever we quarrel.

Once, when we were quarreling, he engaged in a cold war with me and ignored me for a week. Despite my shameless efforts to try and make amends, he still chose not to bother about me or respond to me. That day, the radio in the car was broadcasting Zhang Xuan's song "Baby". There was a line in the song that goes "My little rascal, little rascal, I'll make you laugh, to let you like this world."

I said, "Look, aren't this lyrics talking about you? You're like a little child who feels that the entire world is yours."

After conversing with myself for a while, my voice grew softer and softer, and I gradually choke up, feeling extremely wronged and unappreciated. I thought in my heart – Fine, ignore me then, at most we'll just break up.

The entire journey was filled with silence. The car stopped before my company, and I prepared to alight. Suddenly, he grabbed hold of me, and replied sullenly whilst keeping his eyes glued to the floor, "But... But I don't like the entire world, I only like you."

Tears streamed down my face.

010

My grandmother is extremely old, and her brain has become slightly fuddled. To everyone's amazement, however, she can communicate with Mr. F despite not being able to communicate with the rest of us. There was one year when we returned to Grandmother's home to celebrate Chinese New Year. I was helping my mother prepare the dishes whilst Mr. F was in the yard chatting with Grandmother, and I overheard him teaching Grandmother English.

"'I love you' means I love you."

"Wait, speak slowly... I... what?"

F patiently said, "I....lo...ve....you."

Grandmother confidently nodded, "Committed to memory!"

At night, when we were eating dinner, I intentionally asked Grandmother, "I heard that you have learnt how to speak English?"

Grandmother was delighted, "Little F taught me how."

Mr. F turned to her, asking, "How do you say I love you in English?"

"I... I... I..." Grandmother tried her best to recall, and finally blurted out "I...glub yo!"

The whole table roared with laughter.

Late at night, I came out to retrieve a cup of water, and saw that the light in Grandmother's room was still turned on. I assumed that Grandmother had simply forgotten to turn off the light as usual, and walked over to her room. Upon reaching the doorway, I saw Grandmother sitting alone in an armchair whilst holding my deceased Grandfather's portrait, saying "Oldie, I glub yo."

...

That night, when Mr. F and I were lying on the bed, Mr. F hugged me and said, "Grandmother is very lonely, we ought to come back more often to accompany her."

All of a sudden, I felt like crying.

Those who are unfamiliar with Mr. F always feel that he is like a rock – extremely cold and unfriendly.

Only I know that he isn't like that.

He is very gentle, the gentlest man I have ever met.

011

The night before we obtained our marriage certificate, I asked him, "When did you start to develop feelings for me?"

He answered, "I don't remember."

"But, why me?"

"Why not you?"

"I'm very petty, and I get jealous very easily."

"So am I."

"I'm afraid I'm not worthy of you."

"So am I."

"I haven't really dated, so I don't know what is love."

"I don't know either."

He held my hand gently, "But I know this. When I think about spending the rest of my life with you, I feel that my future is filled with hope."

At 16 we used the same class desk, with less than 10cm between our arms. My peripheral vision was full of him.

At 26, I woke up in the morning, and saw the sunlight softly shining on his face. I thought, this is how I want to grow old – gradually, together, with him.

I guess this must be love.

This Chapter of I Don't Like This World, I Only Like You brings us back to the time when Mr. F and Joey were students. There, we see how they meet, how they interact, and how they gradually develop their relationship. Once again, this chapter is split into two parts, and this first part is a very preliminary introduction of Mr. F and Joey's student lives – Mr. F being the cool know-it-all and Joey being the happy-go-lucky girl who just wishes to scrape past her exams.

Chapter 2: He who was my Deskmate

001

When we were studying, Mr. F was a legend in our school. His face was like the actors in TVB dramas who were casted to act as righteous anti-terrorism elite; his results were so good it was considered twisted; and he could even play the saxophone. Thus, he was the object of fantasy for many female students, regardless of whether they were awake or sleeping.

He was rather snobbish, always putting up a cold front in front of others. During that period of time , I merely thought of him as a refrigerator who liked to act cool – my ideal boyfriend was Chan Ho Nam, as I dreamt of becoming the girlfriend of a godfather: together, we would use our axes to slash our way to survival from Causeway Bay to Tsim Sha Tsui, and live happy and carefree lives thereafter.

Our high school was the best in our city. However, our school had a rather odd rule – that the seats in the class would be distributed in accordance with results. Since our form teacher was extremely law abiding (he must have been a Cancer), we were always instructed to queue up outside the classroom after our Mid-Year Papers and Final Year Papers. The form teacher would then slowly go down the results list; only those who have been called could go into the classroom to select their seats.

This experience was a terrible one, and I always felt that this rule is one of the most inhumane rules that has ever been invented. Mr. F was always the first to enter the classroom, but he never sits in the first row, because he doesn't like it. Rather, he would sit in the fourth row, with his seat always being the one nearest to the window – it has a good view, so it was more convenient for him to day- (act) dream (cool).

At that time, there was a male student in class who never washes his hair; however, as he admired me, he enthusiastically wrote me a love poem, title "Spilling My Hot Blood All Over Your Tombstone". Since I was always just slightly worse than him in terms of results, I would necessarily be required to share a table with him. Just the mere thought of my tombstone with his blood splashed over it gives me goosebumps.

When I was due to select my seat, the only other seat available was the one besides Mr. F – he always sat alone – in this strange, perverted school of mine, great privileges were bestowed on those who could excel academically.

Thus, I did the bravest thing I ever did in my life. I grabbed my bag and escaped to Mr. F's side, plopping myself down on the chair before he could say anything.

He turned his head and glanced at me – I remember that he was listening to music through his earphones then. I smiled at him extremely awkwardly, while he simply looked at me expressionlessly, remaining silent until the CD in the music player had finished playing.

"Is it Jay Chou?" I tried to engage him in small talk. Jay Chou was extremely popular then, entire rows of shops on the streets were always playing his music. Mr. F opened his music player, and changed the CD before putting his earphones back on. He replied coldly, "The Beatles."

That's how we became deskmates.

Many years later, whenever I recall this encounter I would complain, "Couldn't you have been friendlier to your new deskmate?"

"Sorry." He apologized sincerely, "After all, nobody could have possibly known that the person who sat down would be my future wife."

002

Mr. F was an extremely quiet person, and rarely spoke unless compelled to. If he could answer the question with a monosyllabic word, he would never use a multisyllabic word. If he could make his point with a single phrase, he would never use a sentence. If he could summarize his reply within a single sentence he would never use two. In any case, chatting with him will cause one to be frustrated to death.

When he was small he learnt the saxophone for a period of time. It was precisely because of his taciturn nature that my mother-in-law suspected that he suffered from autism. Coincidentally, she had connections with a famous saxophone teacher then, and thus she made F attend saxophone lessons in the hopes of allowing him to make more friends.

Not long after, the teacher complained to my mother-in-law, claiming that Mr. F simply couldn't meld into the group.

My mother-in-law decided to have a chat with Mr. F.

"Son, how many people learn the saxophone with you?"

"4 or 5."

"How are they?"

"Alright."

"Is there anyone who you get along particularly well with?"

"No."

"You must take the initiative to approach others, and try to converse more with them. If possible, you could also invite them to visit the house."

"Can't."

The introverted gourd shook his head severely.

My mother-in-law was on the verge of breaking down, "Why not?"

The introverted gourd answered with an air of righteousness, "I'm using my mouth to play the saxophone, so there's no time to talk."

When my mother-in-law recounted this incident to me years later, I snuggled into the sofa and laughed uncontrollably. I told my mother-in-law that she ought to have let him learn ballet instead – then, his mouth would be free to talk to others.

Mr F. passed by with a cup of water, and rolled his eyes at the both of us.

003

I underwent a major operation when I was in Junior High. Because the operation caused some damage to my nervous system, there were a couple of years during which my entire back had a total loss of feeling. I rarely bring this up in front of others, and nearly no one knew about it.

One day whilst we were doing self-revision in class, the female student seated behind me started to play 'Guess the Word' with her deskmate.

After playing a few rounds with her deskmate, she asked me to sit up and proceed to write on my back in an enthusiastic fashion. I was instantly stunned as my back had no feeling at all.

I shook my head and told her that I couldn't guess the word. She began to write another word on my back, and I shook my head once more.

She was in a state of disbelief, and commented that I must have been pretending – the word she wrote was so simple, how could anybody fail to guess the word?

It was an extremely awkward moment for me. If I didn't explain my nervous system injury, there does not appear to be any other reasonable explanation for my inability to guess the word; but if I started explaining my injury, it would be extremely troublesome. At that moment, I was at a loss as to what to do.

Just then, Mr. F, who rarely plays with us or talks to us spoke up. "Let me try."

I wasn't very familiar with him then – even though we were deskmates, we hardly spoke as he was a ten thousand year old iceberg after all. Thus, when he spoke up just then, everybody went into a state of shock: Is the genius finally descending from this throne to interact with us commoners?

He didn't even wait for me to agree before placing his finger on my back and writing. Naturally, I had absolutely no idea what those words were, but Mr. F's participation had revved up everybody's interest in the game, causing everyone to stare intently at me. I felt that it would be extremely embarrassing if I refused to answer; thus, I just picked out a word offhandedly, claying that he wrote his surname.

Who could have guessed that he would claim that I was right.

I was extremely shocked! My guess was actually correct?!

Subsequently, he wrote another word on the back. Once again, I tried my luck and guessed that it was my surname.

He chuckled, and replied in his low voice, "Yup, right."

The female student sitting behind me was puzzled, "But no matter how I look at it, it doesn't look like Joey's surname to me."

However, nobody bothered to investigate further, and chose to continue chatting instead. Thus, I managed to fudge my way through successfully without getting caught.

Till today, I still have no idea what Mr. F wrote at that point in time. It was only later that I discovered that Mr. F had already known about my operation beforehand. The school had conducted a physical examination previously, and my absence on the day that they returned the physical examination report resulted in my report being placed on my desk. It was then that he glanced at my report and silently committed my injury to memory.

004

If Mr. F is "the man who can recall everything at first sight", I would be the "woman who is unable to recall anything despite multiple sights."

My math was terribly poor, whereas his was excellent. Whenever we sat for our exams, he would always solve the questions at lightning speed, and basically only required half an hour to complete the paper, after which he would stare out of the window and drift into a daze. It was only then that I dared to sneak a few peeks at his answer sheet and copy his answers.

I continuously comforted myself whilst copying – after all, the Bible says that "It is more blessed to give than to receive"; therefore, what I'm doing does not constitute cheating, I'm simply helping Mr. F rack up points so that he'd be able to obtain more blessings in the future.

The process usually goes like this:

(Sneaks a few peeks at his answer sheet) ACBCD, BCAAD, okay, got it.

(Buries my head and furiously scribbles the answers) BCAAD, BD... What was it again? Darn! I forgot!

(Sneaks a few more peeks stealthily) Oh oh, it's BCAAD...

(Buries head again) Wait... Was the final answer B or D? I didn't look properly!

Just when I was about to take another look at his answer sheet, I discovered that this person had actually folded his answer sheet into half!

I looked up in surprise – only to find him staring at me silently, with an expression of disdain etched on his face.

I managed to squeak out a hollow laughter, and tried my best to recall whether the final answer was B or D, but to no avail.

Finally, a cold voice rang out, "It's D."

...

He complained disparagingly, "You can't even copy properly? So stupid."

I could only grit my teeth and silently bear the insults for the better good, instead choosing to act as if I didn't hear anything.

Mr. F was the Mathematics representative. Before we became deskmates, we had absolutely no interaction at all. That said, there was an incident which remains deeply etched in my mind.

The exam scripts were being returned to us then. The Mathematics teacher had divided the exam scripts into two piles – one pile for students who managed to pass (this was given to Mr. F to distribute), and another pile for those who failed (and this was left to the teacher to distribute). Naturally, my exam script was in the pile that failed.

When it was my turn, the Mathematics teacher said disparagingly, "Only four correct answers for a simple multiple choice paper? Even a pig that I'm teaching would score better than that."

Mr. F walked past at that precise moment, and glanced at my paper. He then righteously rebutted the teacher, "She has five correct answers." The teacher was momentarily stunned, and the whole class made extremely ambiguous noises, "Wow~~~~~"

From that moment onwards, I was given a new nickname – "Five Answers". Subsequently, when I was working in Beijing, the company which I was working for was coincidentally situated at Five Answer Street. It's as though I'm forever cursed to have "Five Answers" tag along with me in my life.

Speaking of this matter, Mr. F is unable to recall even an inkling of this incident. Thus, he doesn't even realize that this nickname of mine is bestowed on me solely because of him.

After the incident, Mr. F's role as Mathematics representative was suspended after a few months – the reason is because this person is unable to recognize faces easily. On top of that, he is often unable to memorize people's names. This resulted in him often returning the exam script to the wrong person.

005

I really like Jay Chou. One year, he came to our city to hold a fan club meeting. Even though the organizers announced that they would only be distributing the tickets at 5PM, the fans had already started to queue up by 12 noon. From a distance, one could observe the black masses of people assembling whilst hugging their banners, as though they were an illegal mob.

I deliberated on whether I should play truant in order to get hold of some tickets, and begged Mr. F to help me. He coldly refused.

I decided to play truant anyway, disregarding Mr. F's lack of support in relation to my course of action. I sent a text message to my form teacher, informing her that I was suffering from menstrual cramps and had to return home that day.

Who knew that on that particular day, my brother would suddenly discover his conscience and took the initiative to help me obtain medical leave. He told my form teacher that I had injured my leg, and had to report to the hospital. (This annoying brother of mine specializes in causing trouble for his sister for twenty years.)

Mr F., though seemingly disinterested in helping me out, couldn't resist helping out at the last minute. He then ran to the form teacher to inform him that I had to return home as a result of a fever. The form teacher became enraged and slammed the table, "She herself said that she had to go home because of menstrual cramps! Her brother then told me that, having injured her leg, she had to go to the hospital! Now you come to inform me that she's having a fever – So, what exactly is she doing?!"

According to witnesses at the scene, Mr. F. was stunned into silence for a second – only a second – before replying calmly, "As a result of her menstrual cramps, she suffered from a persistent high fever. However, she insisted on attending physical education class, and as a result she fell from the horizontal bar and injured her leg. Thus, her mother brought her to the hospital." During the entire process, his face never even reddened for a moment. This ability truly renders people speechless. Upon hearing about this incident, I patted Mr. F's shoulder and sighed regretfully. It's a pity that Mr. F was born in China. Had he been born in the Golden Triangle, he would definitely have been the head of the criminal syndicate who wouldn't experience increased palpitations or a change in face color even at gunpoint.

There was another instance when we were due to take our Chemistry exam. Before our class was due to take the exam, another class had already sat for the Chemistry paper. Thus, I decided to be smart and obtain the answers from the earlier class.

Mr. F wanted me to revise my work properly, but of course I wasn't so obedient. Instead, I chose not to heed his advice, throwing my books aside and obstinately trying to memorize the answers. Because of this incident, Mr. F was rather upset with me and decided not to speak to me for one whole day.

On the day of the exam, I was extremely confident. However, the moment I received the exam paper I was stunned into silence. To my absolute horror, I discovered that the paper I was sitting for was totally different from the one which I had studied!

Mr. F slowly completed his exam script with a "You totally deserve it." expression on his face while choosing to ignore my existence.

Shocked and at a loss as to what to do, tears began forming in my eyes. When the teacher reminded us that there was only ten minutes left before we were due to return the papers, my script was still entirely blank. Mr. F, who was seated beside me, suddenly asked me, "Do you know your mistake?"

I nodded my head vigorously, with the tears still in my eyes.

He threw his exam script to me, "You better not try the same thing next time."

says:

Thankies for the chapter~

Heehee~ The start of their love. Sounds like a romcom plot.

Are the pictures attached in your chapters from the real book? The picture also has the guy saying "D" to the girl.

I've seen these pictures garnering popularity over the Internet (Facebook) with hashtag #relationshipgoals. I've always wondered where these pictures originated. They are very sweet~

dramasbooksandtea says:

Haha it totally does sound like a rom-com, doesn't it! Which makes the sweet moments uber sweet because they truly happened in real life. Haha some pictures are part of the original illustrations from the book, but majority of the pictures are taken from a popular Korean artist whose drawings, as you rightly mentioned, have gone viral. You can try looking for 'Puung', that's the artist's name!

says:

Oh! Thank you~ I hope she has instagram~

says:

Oh my, she reminds me of myself (the cheating scene)...oops! :)) I have bad vision so I have to squint bwahah

dramasbooksandtea says: says:

Thxs for the chapter

At the end of this Chapter, we come to a close to some of the more interesting episodes that happened during Joey and Mr. F's school life. We continue on the journey, and will be introduced to some of the more impressionable characters in Joey's life, such as her brother (who is finally going to make an appearance in the next chapter)! I apologize if updates have been somewhat slow, I fell ill this week and my thus efficiency hasn't been holding up.

Chapter 2: He who was my Deskmate

006

Mr. F's voice was extremely melodious, and he was able to pronounce the words accurately despite being from the Southern part of China. As such, the teacher would always ask him to help record the audio required for listening comprehension for term assessment. Due to his "special position", I started to think of some crooked ideas.

"Could you slow down your pace when you're reading the correct answer?"

"Can't."

"Nobody will ever find out, and you don't have to provide hints for every question! Just pick a few difficult ones."

"Can't."

"I promise to work harder and to revise promptly next time, so please just help me this time round!"

"Can't."

Angered, I sniped at him, "Are you voice recorder?"

"No."

"Do you really bear to leave me in the lurch?"

"I'm not going to help you to cheat."

I felt extremely aggrieved, "But my mum threatened to ground me at home should I fail to perform for English in the upcoming exams."

We had previously promised each other to go barbequing during summer break.

He lowered his head and continued reading his books, as if he hadn't heard a single word of what I was saying.

Who knew that on the day of the exams, this person would righteously recite aloud in an extremely serious tone –

"C. Show ——- her ——- the ——- way ——- to ——- the ——-hospital ——-"

At that time, the term "Slap One's Face" had yet to be invented.

Once, he was down with a cold which he couldn't seem to recover from despite a long period of time. I was extremely worried and wanted to bring him medicine, but I felt shy about it. As such, the pure me thought of an extremely roundabout manner to accomplish my objectives – upon reaching home, I took a long, cold shower, and succeeded in getting a cold.

The second day, I wore a mask to class and passed him some cold medicine, while continuously stressing that I only bought the medicine for him out of "convenience".

He asked, "How come you caught a cold? Did you get infected by me?"

I shook my head, not daring to say the truth, as I was afraid that I would be mocked to death.

Who would ever guess that this person's cold would recover by the next day, whereas I continued sneezing every single day, and lived my life in a daze for a month.

Now that I think about it, I could cry at the stupidity of my thoughts at that time.

007

When the new school term started, Mr. F and I no longer shared the same desk. I was terribly sad on the day we separated; I even cried in secret, feeling as though the sky was collapsing on me. I was very shy and modest then, not like how I am now, sociable and open. He was also not someone who would approach others on his own volition. As a result, we hardly spoke after we separated.

Our class would head to the experiment labs once every two weeks for our Chemistry Practical. The seating arrangement in the experiment labs was identical to our seating arrangement during the first school term – this meant that it was only during Chemistry Practical that I had the opportunity to sit next to him.

As such, I would be in an exuberant mood every time I saw "Chemistry Practical" on my timetable. I would even dig out my best uniform the night before, looking forward to going to school with high hopes.

Once, the school distributed a questionnaire to the students, asking us about our favourite teacher and our favourite subject. Everyone else wrote Mathematics, Languages, or Geography. I was the only person wrote "Chemistry Practical" as a joke of sorts.

I headed to the teacher's office during break time. There, the class representative was compiling the results of questionnaire. He told me that many people had answered "English" as their favourite subject; this was likely because our form teacher was our English teacher.

"There were actually two people who wrote Chemistry Practical." He said.

"Two?!" I raised my voice in surprise.

He nodded his head, "Yes, two."

I remember how I felt then – Boom. It was as though a small firework exploded in my heart.

008

The second year of High School meant that we were required to separate into different faculties; as a result, everyone started to scribble in autograph books prior to the separation. Writing in an autograph book can be a rather ambiguous activity – words that you couldn't bring yourself to say aloud could be written down, and there were a few couples in my class who got together after one party confessed in another's autograph book.

I too, purchased an autograph book and invited the entire class to write in it before naturally placing the autograph in front of Mr. F.

Initially, he was rather unwilling to write in the book, and complained that I must have too much time on my hands; he did, however, relent after my constant wheedling and pleading. "Alright, leave it here. I'll write in it when I have the time."

However, he was constantly occupied. It was only when the second year of High School was nearing its end before he finally remembered to return the autograph book to me. With great expectations, I opened the autograph book gingerly – only to discover that this fellow had only left 5 words for me : Study hard, don't be lazy.

I nearly choked to death in anger.

I only discovered this fellow's sneaky intentions subsequently – because my autograph book was with him, I had to frequently approach him on my own volition. He could also slowly take the time to scan through the messages left by my male classmates; only after ascertaining that there were no signs of any "villainous relationship" did he, with a flourish of his pen, write a few perfunctory lines and handed the book back to me.

009

After being separated into different faculties, I chose to study Arts whilst Mr. F chose to study Science. Mr. F thus ended up in the same class as my brother.

In order to save time, Mr. F's mother helped him rent an apartment near school. Subsequently, my brother also moved into the apartment and the two geniuses started the cohabitation phase in their lives. I visit the apartment occasionally, helping my brother with the washing of his clothes.

There was once I went to the apartment as per my usual routine to help my brother collect his clothes for washing. As both Mr. F and my brother had revision class till 9PM that day, there was nobody at home when I arrived.

However, it was pouring heavily when school ended. As I do not have a habit of brining my umbrella along with me, I was drenched to the bone. Since there was nobody in the apartment, I decided to shower on reaching the apartment, and conveniently grabbed my brother's T-shirt which was hanging in the bathroom.

After that, I went into my brother's room to read some books; given the heavy rain, I thought that it would be better if I waited for the rain to lighten before leaving. After a period of time had passed, I walked out of the room with a cup in hand. Just as I was about to pour some water, the bathroom door behind me opened with a bang.

I turned back, and saw Mr. F.

As he had just finished showering, water droplets were still dripping from his hair. But the main point was that he only wore a pair of trousers – he had walked out with the top half of his body naked and bare!!

My eyes saw the water droplets dripping slowly from his hair onto his bare chest, before gradually snaking down the rest of his body. I instantly had difficulty breathing.

Conversely, Mr. F just looked at me calmly for an extended period of time. Generally, a normal human being faced with such a situation would at least ask "Why are you here?" or "When did you arrive?" in order to reduce the awkwardness experienced by both parties. However, Mr. F didn't do any of that – instead, he behaved as though he wasn't strutting around bare-chested; he walked right up to me and dumped his towel on my head, asking, "You washed up?"

Dumbfounded, I nodded slowly, "Yes."

He took the cup from me and helped me fill the cup with water before returning it to me. "You brother is only due to return slightly later, so I'll send you home first."

Still stuck in a dazed state, I responded, "Okay."

Then, as if I was sleepwalking, I returned to the room with my shaky legs, with a cup in hand and his towel still on my head.

Years later, on recalling this particular incident, I chided him, "You were intentionally bullying me then, weren't you?"

He rolled his eyes at me, "You're blaming me? That T-shirt that you were wearing was mine."

Me: "...."

010

As part of the Sports Day celebration organized by my school, I was appointed to participate in the relay race. Just as I was warming up, I met Mr. F. He promised to come support me since I was so tensed up. I pointed to the spectator stand beside the starting point and told him, "Could both you and my brother stand there during the race?"

He agreed.

I assembled with the other competitors before the race started, and glanced around in an attempt to locate both of them – only to discover that both of them were nowhere to be found! I asked the surrounding students where they were. They informed me that the teacher had previously asked the competitors for the high jump to assemble together.

The gun rang out, signaling the start of the race. The entire stadium was extremely chaotic, with incessant shouts of support ringing out from the spectator stands. My brain was extremely befuddled, and I was so anxious I could feel my stomach clenching up in pain. I was the second runner in the relay race, and just as the first runner was about to pass me the baton, I looked at the spectator stand out of habit. At that very moment, I thought I was hallucinating – there he was on the spectator stand, at the precise location which I had pointed out earlier.

Our eyes met. In that moment, I felt at peace.

Later on, he commented on his surprise; that, despite the anxiety of the moment, I could actually jump up and wave at him enthusiastically. But I don't recall that at all – I only recall the happiness that engulfed me when I saw him standing there. Come to think of it, its slightly odd. When I was young, I wasn't as happy as I am now; I rarely harbored any hopes due to my fear of disappointment. But I trusted him. I really trusted him. Nobody could ever bring me such a great sense of safety like he does.

Subsequently, I found out that he didn't even pass the first stage whilst participating in the High Jump event. I asked him whether he did it on purpose, and he told me that I was thinking too much.

011

Mr. F accompanied me the very first time I watched a ballet performance. As the lead ballet dancer was Mr F's mother, he went backstage to meet his mother after the performance, whilst I simply followed. Mr. F pointed at me and said by way of introduction, "Mum, this is my deskmate Joey."

As it was the first time I met his mother, I was especially nervous (even though we only shared a pure platonic deskmate relationship at that point in time). I wanted to say "Hello auntie, congratulations on your successful performance." In the end, my brain failed me, and I blurted out, "Hey mum, congratulations on your successful performance!"

Everyone was stunned momentarily before bursting out into fits of laughter. I just wanted to find a hole which I could hide in.

The next day I secretly asked Mr. F what his mother thought about me. Mr. F tried to keep a straight face, "Your mum thinks that you're pretty cute."

Once again, I wanted to find a hole in which I could hide.

At that time, nobody knew that it was only a matter of time before I would really address her as "Mum".