Hello! Here's the next part! I know it's been a while but to make up for it this is a long chapter!

"Sophie, you are coming over to my house tonight and I'm not accepting any excuses." Rosie stated cheerfully as she leant on my desk at the end of her shift.

My mind immediately went to my parents and how angry they would be at an impromptu dinner invitation. They loved order and Rosie demanding my presence at her house four hours before the event was definitely not the organised planning my parents desired. But I also knew that they wouldn't refuse. There was one thing that they cared about more than order and that was appearances. They had to appear like other easygoing amity faction members, so they would agree to it.

They also quite liked Rosie, so I knew that my parents would be less angry once they knew that it was her I was going to spend the evening with. They thought of her as the perfect amity girl and often told me to try and copy her. I used to be jealous of her and how my parents adored her even though I was their child, not her. But I later realised that it wasn't Rosie's fault, she was just being herself. She couldn't help it that she was the epitome of everything an amity girl should be and everything I tried to fake, that's just who she was.

"Um, Ok. I'll come around to yours later then." I told her uncertainly. I had a feeling I knew what this evening was going to be about and her next sentence confirmed my fears.

"We have some catching up to do."

I found myself distracted throughout the rest of my shift, not really focusing on anything. I ended up putting four staples in one piece of paper and only stopped because Tricia took the stapler away from me.

Zeke had left long before Rosie, having been seen quickly and sent away hours ago. But not without giving me a cheeky wink as he left.

I was both glad and anxious when the end of my shift came around. I was glad to get out of there and away from a screaming child in the waiting room but I was also nervous about what this evening had in store.

Every couple of weeks I would get a shift that was a couple of hours longer than my normal ones, meaning that I didn't finish in time to get the truck back. On these days I walked home. Today was one of those days.

Everyone had these sorts of days occasionally, it just seemed that I got more of them than my friends ever did. This annoyed my parents as it would mess up our daily routine, but I made sure to warn them well in advance to try and reduce their anger. I was never really sure why they got so angry about it, because my work schedule never changed what they did. They would still eat at the same time, I just wouldn't be there. I would eat alone later when I got back. I would have thought that they would love these evenings as it gave them what they seemed to want most: time without me. But they still liked to glare at me whenever I told them I had a longer shift coming up.

Normally I would enjoy the walk back to my house, savouring the peace and quiet and going at a leisurely pace, but this time I had somewhere else to be, so I made sure to pick up the pace a bit.

And I didn't like to admit it, but I did catch myself scanning the crowd as I walked in case I spotted a familiar dauntless boy.

Just after I told myself off for the third time for getting my hopes up at the site of a dauntless uniform, a train whistled past me. My mind drifted back to just yesterday when I jumped on one of these for the first time and I couldn't deny that a large part of me just wanted to reach out my hand and grab a handle as it whizzed past. I imagined myself leaping onto the train and feeling the wind blow in my face and whip my hair into a frenzy as I watched the city blur as I sped past it. But this was just a fantasy, my feet stayed planted firmly on the ground and before long the train had gone past and was becoming nothing more than a speck in the distance.

It's for the best. I told myself, whilst heaving a sigh.

I had only just managed to make it onto the train last time and that had been with Dean's help. If I tried it on my own, I was sure that I would end up killing myself.

But isn't that risk a part of the fun? A voice in the back of my head asked, echoing the phrase Dean had said to me yesterday.

Stop it, Sophie! You are not in dauntless! You don't belong on those trains!

I carried on walking, forcing myself to keep my head down as I went, because I knew that if I let myself look up I would be looking for Dean again.

I made it home quickly and before I was really ready I was having to confront my parents.

When I walked through the door I heard them talking in the kitchen. I loitered in the hallway and felt my stomach sink when I heard my parents laugh. They never did that when I was around. They barely even smiled when I was in the room.

Was I really such a burden to them that I stopped them laughing? Could they not enjoy themselves in my presence even when they were ignoring me and pretending I didn't exist? Was I really that bad?

I had to be if my parents thought so, right?

Despite the horrible feeling their laughter gave me in my core, I knew that it was actually going to be a benefit to me tonight. The fact that they were in a good mood meant that they wouldn't mind so much that I was going out.

I hesitantly went around the corner and entered the kitchen. For a few seconds I stood there awkwardly in the doorway without them noticing me. So I cleared my throat to make my presence known.

Immediately their laughter stopped and their smiles vanished.

The disappointment was home.

It was like a knife made of ice had been stabbed into my chest as a cold feeling spread through my heart. But I shook it off, this wasn't the moment to wallow in self-pity.

"Um," I stuttered, but my voice came out dry and hoarse so I had to clear my throat again. "I ... Well."

"What is it?" My father snapped at me.

I didn't know why it was so hard to get the words out. Maybe it was because I was still trying to recover from the emotional blow I had just experienced from witnessing their shift in expressions when they learnt I was back.

"Rosie invited me over to dinner tonight." I blurted out, not wanting to disappoint them further by making them wait. "She just asked me today." I added, wanting to try and place the blame on Rosie before they could shout at me for the short notice.

"What? With no warning? That is most irregular and impolite." My mother said in a judgmental tone whilst turning up her nose.

"Yeah, I know. I'm sorry, but she just sort of sprung it on me." I said weekly. Once again placing all the blame on Rosie. I felt kind of bad for doing that but I also knew that it was the safest thing to do. They would never confront Rosie on it and it got me off the hook.

Selfish. A small voice in the back of my head stated. But I shut it up quickly. I never claimed to belong in abnegation.

"That doesn't sound like Rosie at all." My mother said stiffly, not believing for one second that Rosie could put a toe out of line. She was, in my mother's opinion, the perfect amity girl and she wouldn't hear otherwise, especially from the likes of me.

It was this sort of thing that had led me to resent Rosie slightly when I was younger, the way that she was everything I strived to be without even trying. She could gain my parents approval with just a smile, whilst I couldn't seem to do anything right.

But as I say, I had long since gotten over this. The problem wasn't Rosie, the problem lay in me and my parents.

"Well, can I go?" I asked hopefully, ready to just run straight back out the door.

"I suppose so." My mother said reluctantly. I sighed in relief, glad that it didn't escalate into anything bigger. I had turned and started for the door when my mother spoke up again. "But go and change first. You can't go over to the Phillips' dressed like that." The sneer in her voice as she looked me up and down, made my self confidence take a nose dive.

I didn't think that I looked that bad.

Once I had changed into a bright summer dress, and gotten a stiff nod from my mother, I was back out the door. I knew for a fact that the Phillips' wouldn't have cared what I turned up in. They weren't like that. They were a proper amity family, all smiles and bone crushing hugs. They wouldn't judge me on my clothes when I walked in. Mr Phillips would probably still have mud on his trousers from working in the crop fields all day.

I tried to shrug off the feeling of inadequacy and walked the short way to Rosie's house. I wasn't that successful but I made sure to plaster on a big smile before the door was opened by Mrs Phillips.

Nancy Phillips was a beautiful blonde woman who just seemed to glow with happiness every time I saw her. She would always seem so glad to see me and always gave me a massive hug when she did.

"Sophie!" She cheered brightly before pulling me into her arms.

I loved Mrs Phillips' hugs, they were always so genuine and heartfelt.

"Hi, Mrs P." I said, my fake smile being replaced by a real one.

"Rosie told me you were coming over tonight. And about time too. It's been ages since you were last here. I was afraid that Roger's cooking had put you off ever coming back here." She chuckled.

Roger was her husband, Mr Phillips, and he was a notoriously bad cook. The last time I came for dinner Mr P had been trying his luck with the barbeque. It hadn't gone that well and Mrs P had been forced to make substitute sandwiches for everyone.

"I still say that that damn barbeque is broken." Mr P said good naturedly, appearing at his wife's shoulder.

"Of course, dear." She said indulgently, kissing him on the cheek.

This was one of the reasons I loved coming here. This was a real home and a proper family. I just loved the atmosphere whenever I came over, it was always so happy.

"Don't worry, Mrs P, I don't scare that easily." I said, following them inside, to the kitchen, the heart of the Phillips' household.

Mrs P winked at me as her husband gave a rather indignant huff.

The kitchen was already occupied when we entered it. Rosie was sat down in the corner with a book in her lap, that it was clear had been forgotten a long time ago. She was too busy laughing at her brothers who were playing on the floor in front of her.

Rosie had two brothers. An older one, Trent, who was 21 and a younger one, Oliver, who had just turned 8.

The two boys seemed to be in the middle of a very serious card game. Trent had always been good at playing with his younger siblings but he was also a very competitive person and it was clear that at some point during the game he had stopped 'being nice' and was genuinely trying to beat his younger brother. But he appeared to be finding it quite difficult and Rosie found this hilarious.

"Hey guys." I said, drawing all of their attention.

"Sophie!" They all said, grinning.

Oliver dropped his cards to the floor and sprinted across the room to fling himself at me. I had to stagger backwards to steady myself as I caught him. At eight he wasn't as small as he was when he first started doing this.

"Careful there, buddy. You almost knocked Sophie off her feet." Trent chuckled as he too got up and detached the young boy from my hip, before placing him back on the ground. He then made to give me his own crushing hug.

The Phillips' were a bunch of huggers.

"You're welcome." I said smirking, as he released me.

"For what?" He asked, confused.

"For getting you out of losing at cards to an eight year old." I grinned, causing him to playfully shove me.

"Alright kids, that's enough. Dinner's ready." Mrs P said grinning, as she dished up a delicious looking meal.

We all sat around the table and scoffed down the food like we hadn't eaten in weeks. Mrs P was a brilliant cook and dinner conversation at the Phillips' was always exciting. And today was no exception.

Everyone seemed to have an amusing anecdote to share with group and no sooner had one story finished, another would start. There was never a lull in the conversation. Somebody always had something to say.

I never talked much at the Phillips' dinner table, I just liked to listen and take it all in. It was such a different experience to what happened in my house and I loved the change.

After dinner, once Mrs P had shooed me out of the kitchen when I insisted on helping clear up, Rosie dragged me out into the garden where we sat in the evening sun.

We were silent for a little while, but it didn't last long.

"So" Rosie said, dragging out the 'O' sound, making it last a few seconds longer than normal.

"So?" I asked.

Rosie looked at me meaningfully, as though she expected me to spill my guts unprompted, but I wasn't sure what it was exactly that she wanted to hear, so I stayed quiet.

"Well?" She tried again.

"Well what?" I asked, but I got a flat, unimpressed look in reply. "What do you want me to say? You were the one who invited me here this evening, you are obviously looking for something specific." I cried throwing my hands up in frustration.

"You know what I'm looking for. Tell me about Dean." Rosie said excitedly.

"I already did. This morning. You almost got in a fight with Ben about it, remember?" I said dryly, not liking the thought that I had caused friction between my friends.

"Yeah, but I want details!" She whined.

"Ugh. You're such a girl."I groaned, hugging my knees to my chest and burying my face in them.

"Yes, I am. Now spill." When I didn't say anything for a few seconds she continued. "I would have thought you'd want to talk to someone about it. People with crushes usually do."

That got a reaction out of me.

"Whoa! I didn't say anything about a crush!" I said quickly, my head snapping up to look in Rosie's mischievous eyes.

"You didn't have to. I can just tell." She said smugly, causing me to roll my eyes at her.

"Oh yeah? And what gave you that impression then?" I challenged.

"Your smile." She said simply.

I felt like she had knocked the breath out of me.

"What?" I croaked in a small voice, barely above a whisper.

"This morning when you were in the truck, your smile was the widest I've seen it in years and one of your first genuine ones in weeks." She said softly.

I didn't know what to say to that.

She could see through my smiles?

I felt an odd tightening sensation in my chest at that.

"You – I mean, you know – I ..." I trailed off, having no clue what to say to the girl who was shaking up the beliefs I based my life on.

"You are my best friend, Sophie. I know that you're not happy all the time but I know that you don't want to talk about it, so I don't question you on it. But this morning you were so genuinely happy. And that makes me happy for you. So I don't care if the smile on your face is put there by a dauntless boy, or a candor one or even a factionless one. I just care that it stays there."

My heart genuinely skipped a beat at that. Rosie was a much better friend than I had ever given her credit for. I always thought that because she never called me out on any of my lies or fake smiles that she never noticed them. I was starting to see that she had seen them all along, she was just doing what I needed her to do and play along.

Tears prickled my eyes and I couldn't hold them back.

I had spent all of my life holding good people, like Rosie, at arms distance because I didn't think that they would understand, but here was Rosie not only understanding but helping me. She had always been helping me, I was just too stupid to realise it. She had given me what I had needed: a friend who didn't ask questions.

And what had I given her in return? The cold shoulder and lies. I didn't deserve a friend like her.

She had proven herself to be kind and sweet, just like an amity member should be, and I had shown just how much I didn't belong here. I was selfish and mean and Rosie deserved much better than me as a 'best friend'.

What kind of a best friend am I?

"I'm so sorry, Rosie. I'm such a horrible friend. I know that I don't deserve it, but please forgive me. You have been nothing but kind to me and I have done nothing to deserve it." I cried, dropping my head into my hands.

I felt Rosie's arms wrap around my shoulders as she pulled me into a hug.

And now I'm making her comfort ME! I am a truly terrible person.

"What are you talking about, Sophie? You are not a terrible friend at all!" Rosie protested, as she pulled me closer to her.

"Yes, I am. I lie to you all the time."

"shhh"

"And you've known all long. Why didn't you call me out on it?" I asked.

"Because you needed time. I know that you're hiding something big and I know that you're not comfortable with it yourself. So how can I expect you to be comfortable enough to share it with me?" Rosie said as though it was the most normal thing in the world.

"I don't deserve a friend like you! You're too good!" I cried, feeling the deep sense of inadequacy and self-loathing rise up.

What did I ever do to get someone as good as Rosie in my life? I don't deserve this.

"Nonsense. I am no angel. Do you remember last summer when you had to hold me back from kicking Roy Winston's ass? Or when we both got stuck in detention for a month because I stole the principal's briefcase and you refused to let me take the blame alone. And besides this whole 'deserving' thing is ridiculous. You don't get assigned friends based on you moral worth being equal to theirs. You get friends from sticking together and accepting the other person for who they are completely. You are my friend, secrets and all." Rosie said seriously, sounding much older and wiser than her 18 years.

"Thank you" I whispered. The words feeling too small to show my gratitude to her, but they were all that I seemed to be able to find.

It was odd having someone stand in front of me and say that they accepted me for who I was, even with all of my flaws and knowing that I lied to them daily. But I kind of liked it. A warm tingling feeling spread from my chest out to my fingers and toes.

I didn't think anyone had ever shown me so much affection before. My parents certainly hadn't. They picked out each of my faults and not only commented and criticised them but they actively used them as reasons not to love me.

"There is no need to thank me." Rosie said, waving me off as though I was being ridiculous for even saying it. "I'm just being a friend. You would do the same for me, wouldn't you?" She asked. But she said it in a way that made it clear that she had no doubt in her mind that I would do the same for her.

She believed in me, it was me she was trying to convince.

"Of course." I replied, immediately.

Before this evening I would possibly have been more hesitant in my reply, I would have still done practically anything for her, but now, after the acceptance she had just shown me, I was positive that there was nothing I wouldn't do if she asked me to.

"Good." She grinned a contagious smile, which caused an answering, slightly wobbly one to spread on my face. "But don't think that you've gotten out of talking about your dauntless boy. I need to know all of the details."

My grin stayed in place as I looked at the girl I had massively undervalued these last few years and I couldn't help but kick myself for not having seen sooner, for not noticing until she shoved it right under my nose, what a great and intelligent person she was.

It was then that I decided I would share all my secrets with this girl, even the ones I hated myself for, even the ones that kept me up at night. She deserved to know them and she deserved to know me. She had proven herself to be the best friend that I could have asked for and it was time I honoured that by being honest with her. Maybe it wouldn't be today, but at some point soon, I would tell Rosie everything.