But I Can't Help
"I asked to love her once again
You fell, I caught ya
I'll never let you go again, like I did
Oh, I used to say~"
Until I Found You - Stephen Sanchez
--
Y/N laid in bed, staring at the ceiling.
She couldn't sleep, tossing and turning in her bed.
It had been a week since she had arrived at the Hazbin Hotel, and since she had that fight with Lucifer.
Since then, the two of them avoided each other, Lucifer walking out of the room whenever he saw Y/N, the two of them only being in the same room when everyone was eating breakfast and dinner together.
It was awkward, to say the least. Everyone in the Hotel knew that something had happened between the two angels, they just didn't know what.
Y/N wanted to talk to Lucifer, she really did, she just didn't know how.
How would she approach him? What would she say? Would he even hear her out?
...
Deciding that sleep was no longer an option as this point, Y/N got out of her bed, stretching out her wings.
She decided she was going to go for a little walk around the Hotel. Everyone was in bed sleeping away their worries, so she didn't have to worry about running into anyone.
Quietly opening her door and tip toeing our of her room, Y/N quietly walked around the Hotel, being so very careful not wake anyone. She thought that it was quite pretty seeing the usual loud Hotel all quiet and peaceful.
It reminded her of when she was in Heaven. Whenever she was restless or had something on her mind, she would fly to the roof of her home and sit and look at the beautiful night sky. She didn't know why, but something about staring up at the starry sky calmed her down in some way.
Maybe that would have the same effect on her, even if she was in Hell, she thought.
Stepping into the warm outside, Y/N looked up at the sky. It wasn't dark, instead being a very dark red, and there were no stars, but it was still pretty in it's own way, even if the sky was clouded by smog.
Y/N sighed and stretched out her wings, flying up to the roof of the Hotel. When her feet landed, she was surprised to see a figure sitting on the ledge on the other side, staring up at the sky.
"Hello," she said, walking closer to the figure, not knowing who it was. "Do you mind if I sit with you?"
The figure turned it's head, Y/N now being able to see the figures pale face and rosy cheeks. "Lucifer," she stammered. "My apologies, I'll just head back inside."
"No, it's fine" Lucifer said, turning his head back towards the sky. "You can sit if you want."
"Are you sure?"
"Positive,"
Y/N quietly shuffled to where Lucifer was and gently sat down next to him. She didn't want to start another argument with him so she just sat there and looked up at the sky without saying a word.
The two of them sat there for what felt like a lifetime, just sitting there in silence staring at the dark red sky. In some way, it was almost comforting. It reminded Y/N of the times her and Lucifer would be in each other's presence before he was cast down.
Comforting and peaceful.
Y/N sighed, breaking the silence. "I didn't expect to find you here."
Lucifer let out a quiet chuckle, tilting his head slightly but not looking at her. "And yet, here I am. What a coincidence."
She folded her arms, glancing at him warily. "You don't believe in coincidences."
"No," he admitted, finally turning to face her, his red eyes gleaming in the dim light. "I don't."
Silence again.
Y/N shifted her gaze back toward the horizon, the skyline of Hell stretching endlessly before her. The tension between them was palpable, heavy with unspoken words, but it was different now—less hostile, more uncertain.
She took a breath. "I... came up here to clear my thoughts."
Lucifer smirked. "Ah. So you're saying I'm ruining your peace, then?"
She shot him a look, but there was no real bite behind it. "No," she admitted. "Not this time."
Lucifer's expression softened, just barely. He studied her for a long moment, and then, as if deciding something, he sighed. "I suppose I should say it."
Y/N arched a brow. "Say what?"
He exhaled, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck in a rare display of hesitance. "I was an ass."
She blinked. "That's putting it lightly."
He chuckled at that but didn't argue. "I let my pride get the better of me," he admitted, his tone quieter now. "Seeing you here... I wasn't expecting it. And I handled it poorly."
Y/N studied him carefully. Apologies from Lucifer were rare, and though his words were casual, there was sincerity beneath them.
After a moment, she sighed. "I wasn't exactly gracious, either."
Lucifer looked mildly amused. "Gracious? Y/N, you all but declared war on me with your eyes alone."
She gave him a pointed look. "You weren't much better."
His smirk faltered slightly, and something unreadable passed through his expression. "No," he agreed, voice quieter now. "I wasn't."
Y/N let his words settle, then exhaled. "I should have handled things differently. I let my emotions dictate my actions, and that was... irresponsible."
Lucifer watched her for a moment before shaking his head. "No, it was honest."
She met his gaze. "Honesty and recklessness are not the same thing."
"Perhaps not," he mused, looking back at the sky. "But neither are honesty and weakness. You're allowed to feel, Y/N. Even here."
She frowned slightly at that, at the way his voice held something close to familiarity, as if he were speaking from experience. She didn't press him on it.
Instead, she let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. "So... you forgive me, then?"
Lucifer let out a small laugh, shaking his head. "Only if you can forgive me also."
Y/N smiled. "Of course. When have you known me to hold a grudge?"
The two of them sat there in silence for a while, side by side, looking out over the city.
"I missed you, Y/N. So much." Lucifer whispered.
"I...I missed you as well, Lucifer." Y/N whispered back.
Lucifer's hand found Y/N's, slowly and carefully intertwining their fingers. Y/N was surprised but let him, missing the feeling of his comfort.
For the first time in a long time, the past did not feel quite so heavy.
--
The morning in the Hazbin Hotel was like any other—loud, chaotic, and teetering on the edge of disaster. Angel Dust was draped over the worn-out lobby couch, filing his nails as Cherri Bomb dangled upside down from the chandelier, munching on a stolen bag of popcorn. Husk was behind the bar, pretending to wipe down glasses but really just looking for an excuse to start drinking early. Niffty zipped around with a duster, cleaning things that didn't need cleaning, while Charlie and Vaggie stood by the front desk, already bracing themselves for whatever fresh madness the day would bring.
But none of them were prepared for what they saw when the elevator doors slid open.
Lucifer Morningstar, the literal King of Hell, stepped out first, as effortlessly regal as ever, his usual smirk in place. But what truly made the room fall into stunned silence was the figure walking beside him—Y/N, her pristine white dress barely tainted by the grime of Hell, her posture as poised and composed as ever.
And they were talking. Casually.
"...and I still don't understand why you insist on keeping your library in such a state of disarray," Y/N was saying with an air of exasperation.
Lucifer chuckled. "It's not disorganized—it's selectively arranged by my own system. You just have no appreciation for controlled chaos."
She sighed. "It's chaos, that much is certain."
The entire lobby gawked at them.
Charlie's eyes widened in shock, her mouth slightly open as she exchanged a baffled glance with Vaggie. Angel Dust actually dropped his nail file. Husk narrowed his eyes, as if checking to make sure he wasn't still asleep. Cherri Bomb let out a dramatic gasp, nearly falling off the chandelier.
Even Niffty froze mid-spin, clutching her duster with both hands.
"...Did I hit my head?" Husk finally muttered.
"No, no, no, hold up," Angel Dust cut in, sitting up straight. "Am I hallucinating? Did we get slipped some weird Hell-drugs? Since when are you two all buddy-buddy?"
Lucifer's smirk widened ever so slightly as he looked at the stunned expressions around him. "Oh, come now," he mused, spreading his arms. "Is it truly so shocking to see two old acquaintances finding common ground?"
"Yes," Vaggie deadpanned.
"Absolutely," added Husk.
"One hundred percent," Cherri nodded, still hanging upside down.
Even Charlie, ever the optimist, looked utterly lost. "But... I thought you two hated each other?"
Y/N, to her credit, did not look nearly as amused as Lucifer, to admit, she was a little embarrassed. She glanced around at the expectant, slack-jawed expressions and let out a small sigh. "We never hated each other," she corrected smoothly. "We simply had... differences to reconcile."
Lucifer hummed in agreement. "And now we've reached a lovely understanding, haven't we, angel?"
She shot him a look at the nickname but let it slide. "Something like that."
That did nothing to ease the growing confusion among the hotel's residents.
Angel Dust leaned toward Charlie, whispering loudly, "Okay, but like, did they make out or what?"
Charlie turned bright red. "Angel!!"
"What? I'm just saying—this is like, really suspicious! You saw them last week! They were about to rip each other's pretty faces off!" He gestured dramatically at them. "Something happened."
Vaggie folded her arms. "For once, I actually agree with Angel. This doesn't add up."
Y/N sighed again, pinching the bridge of her nose. "We simply had a conversation. One that resulted in us settling our differences. That is all."
Lucifer, of course, wasn't helping matters, looking entirely too smug. "My, my, the scandal of it all," he drawled. "Two former celestial beings resolving their issues like adults. Shocking."
Angel Dust narrowed his eyes. "I don't buy it."
Cherri Bomb flipped upright, landing beside him. "Yeah, me neither."
Lucifer chuckled, enjoying the theatrics. "Believe what you will," he said airily. "But unless you'd like to fund a full investigation, I'm afraid you'll simply have to accept the reality before you."
Angel crossed his arms. "Fine. But I'm watching you two."
"Oh, I'm so frightened."
Charlie, ever the peacemaker, clapped her hands together awkwardly. "Well! If you two are getting along now, then that's... um... great? I guess?"
Y/N gave her a small nod. "It is not my intention to cause undue distress. My purpose remains the same. My personal matters with Lucifer are irrelevant to that."
Charlie blinked. "Right. Of course. That makes sense..." She paused. "I think?"
Lucifer chuckled again, throwing an arm lazily around Y/N's shoulder. "Oh, come now, my dear. No need to overthink it. Just be grateful the tension is gone.
Y/N stiffened at the contact, but instead of snapping at him, she merely gave him a look.
"Remove your arm, Lucifer."
He grinned. "As you wish."
He let go, but the smirk never left his face.
Angel Dust turned to Husk, whispering, "I know she wanted to deck him just now."
Husk smirked. "Yeah, but she didn't. That's what's weird."
Vaggie sighed. "Whatever this is, let's just hope it doesn't end in a massive disaster."
Vaggie sighed. "Whatever this is, let's just hope it doesn't end in a massive disaster."
"Oh, come now," Lucifer said smoothly, clearly having heard. "When have I ever caused a disaster?"
Everyone in the room groaned.
Y/N just shook her head. "This is going to be insufferable."
Lucifer grinned. "Oh, absolutely."
And with that, he strolled away, whistling an eerily cheerful tune, while Y/N followed at a composed—if slightly exasperated—pace.
The moment they were out of sight, Angel Dust turned to the others. "Okay. We need a game plan."
Charlie groaned. "Angel, please don't—"
"No, no, listen," he interrupted. "Something's going on with those two, and we are not gonna let it slide." He slammed his hands on the counter. "I'm starting a betting pool."
Cherri Bomb gasped. "Oh, I am so in."
"Guys!" Charlie protested.
But it was too late.
The Hazbin Hotel was now officially invested in the mystery of Lucifer and Y/N.
--
IM GOING TO TRY TO UPDATE MORE I PROMISE
thanks for being patient :))
stay safe and drink lots of water <33
xoxo, Izzy
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