Everybody says that everyone needs a person to talk to in bad moods. They say this person is special. It's more than just normal friendship. It's even more than love.
It's a connection wich won't fade away quickly.
And when you are feeling down you can talk to this person. You can always tell this person your problems. And he/she will listen. This person will make you feel better. This person will make you laugh again. No matter what happend before.
This person makes you happy.

I wish I could have this person. I wish I could tell someone my problems. I wish someone could make me feel better and laugh.
But I won't get this person. Everyone only talks about itself. I am not different. I also want to talk about myself. But mostly I just listen to other people's problems. And when I am trying to talk about me they interrupt me and go on talking about them.
It's a normal conversation.

And especially you. You, you have this person. You know you have it and you are happy.
I hate you for that. I hate it that you always talk about her. I hate it that you connect everything with her. I just hate it that you show me what I can't have.
I hate you. I HATE YOU SO MUCH. I really wish you would disappear right now.

Why do you have to talk with me when you have her by your side?! Why am I just someone to replace this person for a short time.
Why? Why? WHY?!

Why can't I find a person like that? Why can't I be truly happy?
Why am I still alive...