Gibson McMillan left my flat a few minutes earlier. He leaves me until Friday to make a decision as for my participation in his movie. I have to admit that his speech of encouragement did good to me. He is right. I have to forgive myself before being able to move forward in life, and in the right direction.

I open the window to smoke my cigarette. The scenario in the hand, I begin to go through it. Before leaving, Gibson confided in me that the role in which it imagined me was the one me of the hero, Brody Bennett, the young man suffering from chronic depression. The history takes place in an establishment specialized for the young people in depression or having suicidal tendencies. Apparently, the character whom I am supposed to play suffers both. He speaks to nobody, stays most of the time in his room and refuses the visit of his family. Some pages later, a girl makes her appearance in that kind of psychiatric hospital. She carries a straitjacket. From his room, Brody perceives her and a look is exchanged. He is intrigued by this newcomer.

I turn pages, surprised to be captivated by this history. Some scenes farther, Brody interacts finally with Violet, the girl of the beginning. In the course of the story, they seem to make friends. He asks him why she arrived so handcuffed. She admits to him that she killed all her family on a fit of anger and that the court considered her unstable while sentencing her to a punishment of 15 years in specialized institute. In the words of the girl, we can feel a certain violence getting free. And Brody seems attracted by her darkness. He was himself admitted in this hospital following a suicide attempt after his girlfriend broke up with him. What a pussy, I think.

By arriving at the last scenes, I am completely snatched by the story. And the twist of the end leaves me on buttocks ! There are metaphors on the guilt, on the fact of accepting the consequences of the acts ... Really, this Gibson is endowed to tell stories. The character whom he offers to me could allow me to show another facet of my actor's game. After all, I had turned only in productions where I played bad boys or the petty criminals. I wanted something else.

I go out to the pub of the street corner, that where I am used to go. I called my sister so that she joins me. I felt bad how things turned out earlier during the day and I wanted to be forgiven. I sit down at a table and, a few seconds later, I spot Mercy's khaki coat. I wave at her to draw her attention. She goes to me and removes her jacket before taking a seat on the stool. I had already placed order before she arrives. A pint of beer is in front of me, whereas I took her a Coke. She frowns by looking at the black bottle.

- A Coke? You know that I'm 18, right ? She grumbles.

- I am your older brother, I am not going to incite you to get drunk, I reprimand her with a smile.

She stops pouting and sends me back my smile.

- So, you spoke to Gibson all week long ? Behind my back ? I ask him, calmly.

- You did not want to discuss it and, when I left your flat, I caught an end of the letter which was on the ground, where I found his e-mail address, she explains. I knew that it was the good thing to do and I am not going to apologize for worrying about your well-being.

I lower the head, a sense of guilt monopolizes me.

- No, you do not have to apologize. It is me who have to apologize you, I say to her, by seeing her opening wide eyes. I behaved as an idiot and, in the afternoon, my interview with the screenwriter opened my eyes.

Her eyes are so round that they are within an inch of leaving their orbits.

- So - It means that ... that means that ...

- Yes, I think that I am going to accept the role, I admit by rolling my eyes, without being able to repress a smile.

Mercy almost falls of her stool and begins roaring with enjoyment.

- Oh ! I am so happy to hear you that ! She exclaims jumping into my arms.

I notice that everyone is staring at us. She keeps pushing small shrill cries which keep drawing the attention. I try to calm her down. She takes her seat back around the table.

- There are only good news this week. Between my series and your movie ... She is enthused.

- Wait, wait ... From my part, nothing is made ... The scenario is really brilliant, but has zero production there behind, I do not know how he plans to finance the project, but it is already one step in the right direction, I admit.

She looks at me, her blue eyes filled with tenderness.

- I knew that you were going to say yes, she says, by sipping a mouthful of her soda.

- Keep silent and tell me little how is going to take place your shooting, I ask him, by raising the eyes to heaven, again.

******