This is for saioxo  ^^
I want to see you readers cry when you read this bec this gives me the real feels 😭😭
And thanks, I LOVE the Phantom Troupe so I have loads of inspiration of making this!!
***
"Pakunoda! Isn't it your turn to change y/n's bloody diaper!"

"Ha ha. Ermm, As far as I can remember, it's your turn, Nobunaga." she folded her hands and furrowed her eyebrows, looking away from the man.

Nobunaga was about to shred Pakunoda to pieces when little y/n in her crib cried. You should've look their reactions when the blue sky above them turned into dull grey ones, and the first noise they heard was the roll of thunder.

Their attention looked at the baby's distress. Their eyes widened. If she kept crying the place would be flooding in no time! Both of them started to panic; as they've never know what to do when a baby cries.

"Shh wittle y/n." Machi picked baby y/n up gently and pecked her a soft kiss at her forehead, causing the baby to giggle. The other Phantom Troupe members sighed in relief as the thunder stopped abruptly and the sky turns sky blue, the white clouds danced along the breezy wind.

Feitan smirked. "At least we could go to the beach for now."

*she has the power to control the weather. Typical eh?*

***
Every night, whenever little y/n would accidentally woke up crying the Phantom Troupe would always have a routine like this:

Mondays: Phinks (Chrollo: becs she likes to break his hard exterior and he would at least give her 50 Jennys if she gives him the puppy look or the innocent Gon look)
Tuesdays, Thursdays & Fridays: Machi (because 1) she is the person who would make little y/n giggle if she plays puppets with her or gives her a bedtime story and 2) every time Machi cradles cute little y/n in her arms she would usually suck her pink hair out of habit, but in the end Machi liked it because of how y/n smiles in her sleep~)
Wednesdays:Chrollo (y/n loves it when Chrollo reads her stories, and if the story is a bit too gruesome for her Chrollo would put on YouTube and put the Nae Nae song, doing the dance and dabs JUST for her, plus if you heard his character song his voice is SO nice)
Saturdays: Shalnark
(Shalnark is one of her fave spiders because of one reason. His toys. If she sees him using his antenna or his remote she would whine or give him the cutest doggy look at him which made him surrenderly gave him his remote to you and this is one of the reasons Uvogin secretly supervises things behind the scenes.)
Sunday: Feitan
(If she cries he would first cradle her in his bare arms and wrap her little body with his cloak and if she is hyper he would give little punches at her tummy and she would fight back... And sometimes, tickle her until she is out of breath. If she is tired he would give her a bottle of warm milk while singing some soothing Chinese songs to make her go to sleep)

***
"Say Ma~" Machi cooed, y/n was sitting with her legs crossed and she was clapping her hands.

"Ma-"

"No! Say Nobu~" Nobunaga interrupted, which later was elbowed by Machi harshly.

"Nob-"

"Say Phinks!" Phinks squeaked, making Feitan and Shalnark snickered behind him.

Little did they know her mind changed as she saw her favourite cross behind Chrollo's back.

"Spider!!" She shouted, her little arms flailing towards Chrollo's direction. The spiders looked amused at her first saying and glanced at Chrollo who was shocked at little y/n's first achievement.

Chrollo who looked at y/n wide eyed couldn't help but to close eyed smile; it was her first word after all. Once a spider always a spider.

***

Since she said her first word 'spider' the troupe were more than determined to get their names on her new second and third words.

But since they started to force her to say their names she shook her head and pouted, and their hopes burned into ashes when there was one time when Uvogin scolded (more like insulting) Hisoka he said this:

"Oh fuck you Hisoka!" He howled, his eyes burning with anger as Hisoka gracefully uses his bungee gum (you naturally knew how to use gyo) to stick Uvo's feet to the ground in one place. Hisoka looked more gleeful then ever when Uvo looked strained behind his back.

"Hisska!" You thrust your hands up into the air, accidentally throwing your favourite candy to Feitan who was busy playing cards against Shalnark. Machi almost teared up when she heard her second word and
nearly choked Chrollo.

Y/N's eyes twinkled with admiration as the red haired clown before her made an erotic pose.

Which leads her to do the same.. You waddled cutely towards the clown (and Pakunoda was recording this, as if she can read what will happen next^^) and when you have another look at the clown's pose,

"SCWING!" You puckered your lips in a malicious smile  and placed both of your hands near your lower area while moving back your  hips forward.
"Tch. Copycat." Hisoka rolled his eyes and looked away with a fake, thin smile as y/n hugged his legs from behind.

Everyone died. Feitan 💧 and caused a 🌊 while Chrollo was holding an ☂ feeling wrekt.

"Pakunoda?"
"Yes Chrollo San?"
"Don't. Send. It."

"Hisska! Hisska! Schwing!!"

(Hello~? TheInfinityOfMaybe  ? Are you dead yet? Better not be ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) there is still more of your bae mentioned in here~)
***

"Uwaa!" Little y/n was sobbing, her arms are covering up her eyes, because she was scared. It was the first time she is alone.

She got lost in he crowd at a frosty night before Christmas, and she couldn't see the Trouble Trio anywhere. All she could see was colourful coats blocking her small vision, and she felt as if she was ignored, and she hated that. She sat on the cold pavement, her head buried to her knees as hot tears poured to her cheeks. The atmosphere around her turned colder and snow started to sparkle down, and after a few minutes later it had became a mini blizzard that surrounded her. When it started to snow people around her were still walking but in a faster pace; and when it turned into a blizzard they glared at someone who would've caused a snowy discord.

Poor little y/n was crying out of fear, she felt as if something was weighting her down more and more as eyes bored at the back of her eye sockets. She still can't control her emotions; and this is the very first time she would felt this cold, lonely feeling. The feeling that made little snowflakes into a troublesome blizzard.

"Oi kid," a teenager kicked his right leg at your tummy.

You stopped crying as you felt as if a metal pole landed at your abdomen, your eyes shut tightly hoping that the sharp pain will wear off and the person will not beat you up further.

But you were wrong.

"Oi! Do you hear me deaf?" The man said darkly, now tugging violently on your (favorite colour) scarf causing it to unwound around your neck. Your eyes bulged as he began to tie it around your neck, pulling the ends of the scarf further and further as the blizzard stopped. When you opened your eyes you saw a smirking teen who was looking down on you. You were about to shot a comeback, but your throat was dry and aching.

Black spots danced around your eyes and the only thing that you could do was to weakly say "Zoldyck" before an army of yellow pins pierced through the teen's back.

***
Illumi sighed. "You should take good care of her next time." And extended his arms in front of Shalnark, y/n's eyes were still brimming with tears after what has just happened. She clutched tightly onto the Zoldyck's green vest and shoot an accusing glare at the blonde.

"You weft me!" She whined, looking away from a nervous sweating Shalnark.

"I-It was an accident y/n." He anime cried, his hands raked at Illumi's legs, hoping that he could reach y/n as Illumi raised his arms from his reach.

"Uwaa y/n saaan." He pleaded, "I am so so so sorry." He placed his forehead to the ground, kneeling desperately.

"I will grant you a wish!" Shalnark coaxed, his eyes covered with faked tears. Lucky for him he bought onions if there is any case like this.

She stuck out her tongue. "I want a speaker in my room! And I want to hear one of Uvo's metal songs tonight!" She barked. Shalnark sweat dropped, regretting of asking her in the first place.

As if to make things worse, Hisoka suddenly popped up behind the blonde. Y/N's scowl turned into an amused expression and her lips curled into a mischievous smile.

"I want Hisoka to sleep beside me!"

Hisoka was 🔥 but that's the problem. He is so 🔥🔥even an eight year old kid started to think something else they shouldn't be thinking of when they hang out with Hisoka.

Shalnark cried and handed y/n to Hisoka's arms. Hisoka smirked widely. "My my y/n looks so worked up.. Do you want to watch anime with me?"

If Chrollo is here he would've roast Shalnark right on the spot.

"Awigato Iwumi!" y/n pecked a small kiss at his pale, warm cheeks. Illumi nodded and when he turned his back y/n swore she could see him smile...

***
"SCHWING!" You hit the rubber duck at Hisoka's sweating face.
"Ow! You sure do have some of my traits little (your nickname)"

"TORTIYA! We should make some tonight!" (tortilla ^^")

Since Hisoka joined the spiders you looked very happy when Hisoka babysits you. It is just that he looks awesome as a clown but inside he is as nice as any father could be.

He smiled. "Okay then. 1 shish kebab coming right up~!" And he scrubbed your hair with (favourite scent) shampoo.

Machi accidentally stumbled to the toilet thinking that it is unoccupied and when she saw the sight before her eyes she quickly FANGIRLED and fainted.
Of course, it is a Hisoka with boxers after all~

----
*ehem* looks lien I enjoyed writing this ^^ hope you enjoy Sai-senpai!