Kaori

Aoki's with me when I visited one of the oldest bookstore here in Japan. I wasn't really fond of reading novels. Nagbabasa ako minsan, 'yong mga international fantasy novels. Nakakatapos ako ng isang libro sa isang taon. Hindi kasi talaga ako mahilig magbasa. Nagbabasa lang ako kapag nasa mood ako magbasa.

"I think I'm going to be dead one of these days," Aoki suddenly uttered.

"How can you say so?"

"Well, your boyfriend's men has been lurking around watching us and I'm scared for my life!"

"What do you want me to do? Call him and tell him to fuck off?"

"Your mouth, Kaori!" he hissed and I chuckled.

Always the good boy.

"He won't do anything. Unless you do something he wouldn't like."

"Yeah, right. I'm afraid once I touch you and then that guy right there," he looked at my back. "reported to him, I'm surely dead."

"Can't you just chill a little bit? You'll be fine, trust me."

Hindi kakantiin ni Hussein si Aoki. Dahil alam niyang kapag may ginawa siyang masama kay Aoki, malalagot siya sa 'kin. Mas lalong hindi niya na kami makikita ng anak niya.

When Aoki arrived the other day, Hussein immediately left and warned Aoki not to touch me in any way or else he'll torture him 'til he beg. That's definitely the reason why Aoki is nervous. Hindi ko naman alam na maga-assign siya ng magbabantay sa 'kin. Hindi ko na siya nakita simulan no'n at hindi ko na rin alam kung anong pinaggagagawa niya.

"Look at him, Kaori! He's talking to someone," Aoki pointed.

"Aoki, calm the fuck down." Napairap ako.

"I can't. Holy Jesus!"

"He won't kill you, Aoki."

"How would you know? Have you talked to him? That man is scaring me, Kaori! He's scary as hell!"

Huminga ako ng malalim para ikalma ang sarili. Aoki is stressing me. Simula no'ng nabuntis ako ay pakiramdam ko paubos ng paubos ang pasensya ko.

"See this book? If you won't stop talking, Aoki, I'll be the one to torture you using this book. So shut up and let me have my peace."

He gulped. Nakahinga naman ako ng maluwag nang hindi na ulit ito nagsalita. Nakakatakot talaga si Hussein, makatingin pa lang 'yon ay para ka ng kakainin ng buhay. Mukhang kriminal. Nakakatakot tumitig. Ang laking tao pa at sakop na sakop ang katawan ko.

Hinatid rin ako ni Aoki pauwi. Nang dumating sa bahay ay dumiretso ako sa kwarto ko at humilata. Hindi ko na talaga kayang lumabas ng bahay ng matagal. My body feels so heavy and I just wanna lay down on my bed and sleep. Si Aoki naman ay umuwi sa condo niya. Hindi naman 'yon dito sa bahay ko nakatira. He does visit me to check up on me. Mabuti nga 'yon dahil pakiramdam ko mad-depress ako dito sa bahay kapag kaming dalawa lang ni manang.

When night falls, Manang came in with a visitor. Putok ang labi at nanalaytay ang dugo sa noo. My heart filled with worry. Naiiyak ako habang pinapasadahan ng tingin ang kabuuan niya. He was smiling brightly at me and it shattered my heart into pieces. How can he still smile like that?!

"Anong nangyari sa 'yo? Saan ka ba kasi galing?!" sigaw ko.

Mahinang natawa lang ito at hinila ako palapit.

"You smell good."

"Are you okay? Let me see."

I scanned his face, earning a groan from him. Bumitaw ako sa mahigpit na yakap nito sa 'kin at kinuha ang first aid kit sa banyo. I took care of his wound while sobbing. Maya't maya ang iyak ko dahil patuloy sa pagdudugo ang sugat nito na nasa ulo pala.

I told him we'll go to the hospital but he didn't want to. Kaya sa huli ay ako rin ang gumamot sa sugat niya. Blood was everywhere. Nandidiri ako pero mas nangingibabaw ang takot at pag-aalala. He was all smile watching me. His sight never leaving me, observing every move that I do.

"May dala ka bang damit? You need to change your clothes." Tanong ko.

"Hm. It's in my car. I'll go get it."

"No, ako na," presenta ko.

"Stay here, baby. You're pregnant, you shouldn't move around that much. It'll cause stress."

Nagpakawala ako ng pekeng tawa at namewang sa harap niya. He was still sitting on the bed.

"Wow. Tapos pumunta ka dito na puro dugo. Sa tingin mo ba hindi ako na-stress do'n?! I was worried sick, you psycho!"

"I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

"Mamamatay ako sa heart attack ng dahil sa 'yo."

Nagsalubong ang kilay nito at mukhang hindi nagustuhan ang sinabi ko. Well, that was partly true!

"Don't say that again, Kaori," dumagundong ang matalim na boses nito. "Damn. I'll fucking follow you so don't say that again."

"Magpalit ka na ng damit at umuwi. Matutulog na ako."

I went back to the bed and closed my eyes, forcing myself to sleep. I felt the bed move and when I looked again, he was now at the door, walking out and closing it after. I sighed and covered myself with the blanket.

I saw how his eyes flickered with sadness and pain. He was smiling but it didn't reach his ear. I hate him for showing that kind of smile. I can see through him and I hate that.

Nang bumukas ulit ang pinto ay pumasok siya at iba na ang suot. A grey tee shirt and pants. I am pissed again when my attention landed on his wound.

"Can I sleep beside you tonight?"

"No. Go home."

Nagpakawala lang ito ng mahinang tawa at umakyat sa kama. Nahiga ito sa tabi ko at hinila ako palapit. My back was facing him. I can feel his breath against my neck, sniffing my scent.

"I met your dad. He was mad. That was a normal reaction from him. I, too, would be mad as fuck if our daughter will be impregnated by a peasant I didn't really like." His grip on me tightened, as if afraid of letting me go. "He punched me and I let him until he's satisfied. He didn't fully gave me his approval but it's alright, your man is not backing down. You are fucking mine, my love. All mine. Not available for anyone."

"D-dad did that?" I turned to him, horrified.

Gahibla na lamang ng buhok ang pagitan ng mukha naming dalawa. He's so close that I nearly stopped breathing.

"I'm not mad at him, hm? Relax, sweetheart. I just want to be honest with you. I couldn't bare to see you walking down the aisle marrying a man that is not me. I don't want that. You're only allowed to marry if it's me. I respect your family tradition but I won't let you go. I had you pregnant for a reason, and that is to keep you for myself. You have my heart and that means you will have my last name.

"I am a selfish territorial jerk. Akin ka sa simula, akin ka sa huli."

"Natatakot ako. My grandparents will disown us if... if they find out. Saan kami pupulutin?"

My tears began falling one after another. Mai-issue kami, at kapag tinanggalan na kami ng titulo bilang parte ng pamilyang Hijazi at Norhaya ay mahihirapan sa paghahanap ng trabaho si mommy at daddy, maski ako. Ano nalang ang mangyayari sa 'min?

"Your man is not a billionaire for no reason, baby. I can provide for them. Stay with me and I will do everything to keep you and your family."

"I cannot abandon my parents sacrifice for me. I'm sorry."

"You haven't seen the cruel side of me, Kaori. Don't push me to my limits. Your whole clan wouldn't like it if they'll take you away from me."

"You are mine and that's that. I'll fuck their brains out if they do something I wouldn't like."

*****