Kaori

TONIGHT is the event. Alas otso ng gabi magsisimula at wala pang three PM ay nasa backstage na kaming lahat.

"Have you memorized your introduction already?" my make up artist asked.

Siya ang handler ko at siya ang gumawa ng introduction ko since ang handler ko ang may alam sa background ng ethnic costume na isusuot ko mamaya. My boyfriend is not here. Umalis siya last week patungong Russia. Hindi ko alam kung kailan babalik. Miss ko na siya para alam niya.

"Yes," I answered.

"Just be yourself, okay? Huwag kang kabahan na baka magkamali ka mamaya. Everyone makes mistakes and that's your guide to do better next time. First time mo 'to, right? Then it's alright. Fighting!"

"Fighting!" natutuwang tugon ko.

Nang makabihis ay pinalabas na kaming lahat. At dahil minalas kami ng partner ko, kami pa ang number one. Sa lahat ba naman kasi ng number na mabubunot, number one pa talaga.

"Kinakabahan ako," ani ko.

"You'll be okay, Norhaya. Ready?"

"No!"

But I wasn't going to back down. We gracefully walked in the aisle with our unique ethnic costume. When we reached the stage, the mic was too high for me. So with a pounding heart, I grabbed the microphone stand and adjusted it.

"The history of Banga tells us the story of Filipino's women strength, resilience, and grace." I started, fear was visible in my voice. "Banga or Pot is an earthen container originated by the Northern Cordillera Region of the Philippines. Traditionally, they are made of local clay found only in the Kalinga villages. An area which rice terraces and lush mountains slides. The Kalinga people are highlanders and rice farmers of the Cordillera, having been blessed with some of the best land for rice farming."

Napalunok ako ng mag-pause saglit. Malakas at mabilis ang tibok ng puso ko. I am not really fond of crowded places, especially when all eyes are on me.

"Good evening. This is Kaori Hijazi Norhaya. Tonight, I am wearing this unique ethnic costume from the Northern Cordillera Region. Proud and greatly honored to represent, the Nursing Department."

I smiled as I finished my speech. Okay, good, Kaori. Now, all you have to do is to walk after your partner finishes his introduction speech. After his speech, we proceeded to walk and went to the backstage.

Mabilis ang galaw ng mga tao doon. My handler fed me before the event starts kaya busog na busog pa ako. Para ko pa ngang isusuka 'yong mga kinain ko dahil sa sobrang kaba.

"Next thing you'll do is to slay the stage. Wala ka naman makikita masyado dahil naka-focus sa inyo ang ilaw. Smile, fierce, walk, okay? You can do this!" my handler cheered and I only answered him with a nod.

I don't think I can do this.

Next was the white collection. The song was kinda sexy. Entitled as In Your Eyes. May mga dancer na sumasayaw muna sa intro ng kanta. I already saved the song in my phone kaya alam ko kung anong minuto kami papasok. We will walk at 1:05. Three... two... one...

I walked not that slowly, remembering what my handler told me to do. I can feel everyone's attention in us. Ang nasa utak ko lang ay matatapos rin ang gabing 'to aat matutulog ako ng payapa sa bahay ng boyfriend ko. My partner and I crossed our paths. He was on the left, and I was on the right side of the stage. Crossed paths again, met in the middle, and exit.

I could hardly breathe because of the tension.

"Long gown na ang susunod. We're already halfway in this event. You can do this, Kaori!"

Hindi ako umimik. Paulit-ulit na nagp-play sa utak ko ang mga posibleng bagay na maaari kong isagot sa picture analysis mamaya. I was thankful that it wasn't question and answer, baka mas lalo lang akong mag-panic sa gitna ng stage. It was a picture analysis, at binigay na nila sa 'min 'yon three days before this event.

When the long gown occurred, the music change. Wonder by Shawn Mendes. When the music started playing, I walked slowly up to the podium, facing everyone. May mini stage sa ibabaw ng stage. Sa mini stage ako at sa ibaba naman ang partner ko.

I made my pose for about sixteen seconds before walking in a slow pace since this is a formal long gown. Paikot ang gagawin ko. Iikot ako at gagawa ng malaking bilog sa podium na nilalakaran ko. Ganoon rin ang partner ko sa ibaba. I posed for more when I reached the center of my podium and glanced a little to my partner who's making its way to me. My partner is now standing at the end of the stairs of my podium, extending his arm to get me. I reached for his hand and he guided me when I walked down the three -step stairs. We crossed and posed. I smiled sweetly at the crowd, then the judges, then to my friends. When we met at the center, we made our signature pose and counted twenty-four counts before walking away next to each other.

"After ng picture analysis, ipapakilala ang mga judges, awarding, tapos uuwi na," my partner groaned. "Akala ko makaka-graduate ako ng matiwasay. Akala ko lang pala 'yon."

"Sige na, bumalik ka na sa kabilang side. After nina Carlene at Rain, tatawagin na tayo para sa picture analysis," tulak ko sa kaniya.

Nang dumating ang part ng picture analysis, as expected ay kami ang unang tinawag. They made us choose envelopes. They already talked to us about this. May mga number at section ang bawat envelope para hindi kami malito kung anong kukunin, walang laman ang loob ng envelope. This is all scripted and is going well according to the plan.

"From what I can observe in the picture, I can say that the children are praying and this shows how devoted and expressive they are towards praying to God. Teaching children moral values, the basic of valuing human life, shaping the perspective of the next generation, and developing a community under the common union of Christ."

The event continued until awarding came. I was announced as the third runner up and was so surprised when I won some titles. Akala ko ay estudyante ang magbibigay sa 'kin ng sash, bouquet, picture frame, at award certificate. But I was wrong. Because my one hell of a greek god boyfriend went up to the stage with all of it and made his way to me.

"Why are you here? Akala ko nasa Russia ka," I hissed.

"Didn't you miss me, sweetheart?' then he flashed his heartwarming smile.

"Of course I do."

"I love you."

"I love you too, big boy."

We took a few photos and finally, the event ended. I felt so tired I can't even clean my make up at the back stage. Umuwi ako sakay ng kotse ni Hussein.

"Can I remove my make up tomorrow? Pagod na ako, love," I murmured.

He tucked me in and we made our way to his room. Nilapag ako nito sa kama at inayos ang buhok ko.

"You can rest. I'll remove your make up for you," he gently uttered.

"I know you're tired too. Let's just rest."

"I'm okay. Just sleep. I'll do the rest, my queen."

Tuluyan na ngang bumagsak ang talukap ng mga mata ko. But before that, I felt something in my face. Maybe my big boy started removing my make up already. Dang it. I really love my baby big boy who's a baby only to me.

*****