You looked around Jimin's room in nervousness, thinking of where exactly were you supposed to sleep tonight.

You had arrived at his apartment after the party and he had politely instructed his parents to their room while telling you to wait for him on his room, till he finishes with his shower.

The fact that he was gone for the moment made you feel a little better, you couldn't lie. Especially tonight, sleeping at the same space as him was not easy for you. Especially tonight because his lips were still ghosting over your thoughts, reminding you of their taste and the words that followed after.

Stop thinking about it already. Jeez.

You scolded yourself before finally taking some action and approaching his closet, taking out some blankets and a pillow, as you had decided to occupy the floor.

You were fixing one blanket to create a softer surface underneath you, thinking of using the second thinner blanket as a cover, when you suddenly heard Jimin's voice that talked to you.

"What are you doing there?" He asked making you look above your shoulder as you maintain your position, that were down on your knees and hands.

"I,em~. Fixing the place i will sleep on." You explained, quickly getting up, correcting that body position that was inappropriate.

"Don't say stupid things. You will sleep on the bed." He stated, before going back to ruffling his wet hair with his towel that he still had in hand.

"You don't like strangers touching your bed sheets . I know that well enough." You reminded him, as at the start he had made that clear, that if you were ever to lay on his bed, he would kill you.

"You are not a stranger. Now get changed of that beautiful dress, you can't sleep with it." At his words you immediately looked down at yourself, remembering that Jungkook had found this dress for you and you indeed couldn't sleep with it, cause you had to return it untouched and not full of wriggles.

" What am i supposed to change into? "Jimin threw a pair of pajamas as soon as you finished your sentence as he had purposely not wore those himself tonight and instead was wearing some gray sweatpants and a black tung top.

" Wear those, i will be outside. "He told you before making some steps towards the door but then stopped again and approached you, grabbing you by your shoulders and turning you around. His fingers unzipping the zipper of your dress quickly.

" Here you go. Call me when you are done. "Jimin exited the room leaving you there with goosebumps running down your spine while you were thinking that you were never going to wear a dress that has a zipper on the back, ever again .

You carefully slipped out of the peach colored dress and placed it on the bed, then wore Jimin's pajamas, his scent hitting your nostrils immediately. So sweet, so desirable, so calming his scent was.

It felt almost like he himself was hovering over your body, engulfing you in his embrace.

You shaked your head vigorously at the weird thoughts that were hitting you then walked towards the door and opened it, stepping outside to go call him.

As you did so however, your feet halted, hearing his voice speaking to someone, indicating that he wasn't alone on the living room.

You approached anyway, till the corner where you could have a good sight of the living room, and there he was, an unhappy expression on his face as his mother was standing before him, dressed in her night clothing as she was supposed to be sleeping by her husband's side instead of being up right that moment.

"Did you thought about my offer?" She asked, her hands keeping a hold of the hem of her long silky gown that was falling above her short and exposing night cloth .

"It's not happening." Jimin responded to her, his eyes looking sternly at her, indicating that he wanted for her to disappear from his sight as quickly as possible.

"Because of her?" Her eyes looked at him, soft and hurt, pleading him to say something negative.

However Jimin was not willing to comply to her wishes.

"Because i hate you." The words rolled out of his mouth, so calmly, so normal as if he was meant to say them always when he had her before him.

NeeRin chuckled at his cold response out of pain and hate towards that statement, that was tragically ironic, since he used to say that she was the love of his life some years ago.

"You are such a bastard, you know that?" She smiled, her eyes getting filled with tears as she looked up to him.

"You are such a bastard. How much more do I have to hurt to finally forgive me? Please, what more do i have to do to finally understand me." NeeRin grabbed a hold of his shirt as he said those words, her eyes that were looking at his, full of despair.

Jimin stayed still observing her eyes for a moment, before his hands reached to hers and took them off of him.

" Forgive? Forgive.  Do you even know what you are asking of me? Do you even know what you have made me go through?" His voice soft, displaying emotions that somehow made you feel sad, witnessing such scene.

"Can you even imagine how it was to see the woman you love being introduced to you as your future mother? Can you even understand how it felt for me to keep quiet and let you marry my father, because you asked me to do so. You think if i hadn't understood your reason back then I would have done that? "His painful gaze burned NeeRin's soul as Jimin was showing her how much he had broke and all because of her.

All because she wanted to follow her parents wishes and make them proud. All because he was younger and had no money under his name at the moment she needed him to have them, all because she was always a failure and wanted to prove for once that she could make it. That she could have it all and finally be loved by her parents. Be noticed and accepted , instead of just a mistake that happened to be born as she was considered, in comparison with her other two siblings.

"I always understood you more than you can imagine NeeRin. I knew you better than anyone else so i knew your pain, your hurtful thoughts and all i wanted was to show you that to me, you were never unwanted. To me you were always the center. I-" Jimin stopped himself not understanding why was he saying those words all of a sudden.

Maybe because after her offer of running away with her, he had recalled his feelings for her again, he had recalled his happy memories with her and now he felt like a glass of water, that was so full that was ready to spill it all out.

He couldn't take it anymore, running hiding, sacrificing. He was killing him. The fact that all this years had only tried to keep her away but there she was, still effecting him, was making him crazy.

"You still love me. I know there must be something left in you that still loves me." Her voice echoed in his ears making him wanna rip his heart off, because he knew that she was right.

"For you, I had to go through greeting you every moment, calling you mother. I had to feel the guilt over my soul of hiding something important from my father. I had to bare hearing my own brother confessing me his love for you." He paused, feeling his voice ready to crack at the recalling of the memory.

That night that Taehyung had confessed to him his sin as he called it, and how much he was suffering cause he was having feelings for someone he shouldn't.

It was the first time Jimin had seen his beloved brother trying to kill himself before him, cause he hated himself and was so sorry, it was the first time he had gotten so scared in his life, the first time he had hugged him tight and cried with him at their mother's work place , surrounded by pieces of paper and a silent piano that kept them company till the morning found them.

That day they both were sharing the same pain, as they both felt like traitors towards their father that they both loved so much but Jimin felt more than that. He felt guilty for his brother too, cause he had lied to him, and they used to share everything with each other.

That night was the first time that Jimin felt hate towards the girl he so much loved. Towards the girl that was ignoring for months on after she had become his mother. However even though he had thought that that night was his most painful night, it couldn't be compared with the night he had found himself unable to avoid her anymore.

A night were he and NeeRin were alone in a room and a conversation like this one had broke out between them. Him telling her to forget everything that happened cause he is going to forget about her and move on and her telling him that still loves him, and kissing him.

A kiss that found him weak, because he was still in love with her. She still was the girl that made him happy, that he had put a ring on her finger with dreams of a tomorrow together.

If only he would have been strong enough that night and let that kiss be only that, if only he hadn't gave in to her love that night, if he had remembered to lock the door of his mother's work room. If Taehyung hadn't seen them, him making out with the woman he had fallen in love, on that room that was so dear to both of them. On the same room just a week ago he had shown his feelings to him and trusted him.

But Jimin would have been surely more strong and would have opposed the temptation, if he knew that just some hours ago she was on his brother's embrace. That Taehyung had confessed to her and she had accepted his warmth and love because of her loneliness and to kill the pain Jimin was gifting her with his cold treatment.

If only he could erase that moment, that mistake, that look of hurt from his brother's eyes that made him a traitor for a second time.

After all that, wasn't it absurd? Hearing that he must still love her? Wasn't it absurd, that after all that and all the pain that followed after. Those words were still partially true.

However they were no longer the same love and he noticed that for the first time, tonight.

At that fake 'I love you' that somehow had made him feel genuinely happy even though it was not coming from her lips.

"NeeRin. For you i killed myself, my pride, my heart. I did it all. But there is one thing I will never do." Jimin added while stepping a little closer to her. His hand reaching out and cupping her cheek, making her lean to his touch, longingly.

She had been living a hell too, she had done many things but her heart was always beating for him. In her head she could turn back time and bring his touch back to her, his warmth, his words of love that she threw away to secure a better class, a name and a good amount of money in her bank account.

Things that she still wants and needs but she needs his love as well. They were supposed to be that together after all. They were supposed to accomplish their dreams together.

"I will never betray the pain i went through. I will never betray myself. You may be right, I admit but  this time I really want to move on. No. This time I am moving on." Jimin corrected himself, retrieving his hand, leaving her skin become cold as his hand pulled away. Filling her heart with the same feeling.

Emptiness.

---To be continued.....