Chapter Nineteen
Clydie opened her eyes to find bright morning light filtering in through the lace curtains...and the very first thing to hit her senses was the aroma of something acrid and bitter, letting her know that Ella was already up and no doubt cooking breakfast. Ugh. It smelled like the woman was trying something new. Something that could have been a mixture of car tires and...fish?
The second thing to strike her was that she wasn't looking at the huge stack of boxes that should have been sitting right near the foot of her bed.
Confused, she pushed herself upright and her gaze was immediately drawn toward the bedroom door...and a sharp gasp flew out of her. The boxes were no longer by her bed, but instead, they were each and every one stacked up in front of the door. Seeing the boxes there, towering at least head high, sent a shard of cold disbelief stabbing straight through her.
What the hell...
With an unsteady hand, she turned toward her nightstand and reached for her phone...only to have another gasp erupt from her. There, lined up in a neat and tidy row, sat four orange medicine bottles, their caps all missing.
Suddenly feeling as if she might still be asleep and dreaming, she picked up one of the bottles, reading the label and instantly recognizing that it was a bottle of sleeping pills. The next bottle was the same. And so was the next... All four bottles were filled with the sleeping pills she'd been prescribed, but hadn't taken...the sleeping pills that her mother always insisted on re-filling every month.
With her breath coming in hard and fast spurts, she placed the last bottle back onto the nightstand and glanced back at the boxes blocking the bedroom door. She...she hadn't done that? Had she?
There had been times, over the past two years, when she'd done some strange things in her sleep, had foggy nightmares that had led to her waking up outside the house, lying in the front yard... So, there was a possibility that, even though she didn't remember having a nightmare, she had stacked the boxes there.
But, she had not placed those sleeping pills on her own nightstand because she had no idea where those pills had been. The house was filled with boxes, everything was scattered everywhere, so she couldn't possibly have found those bottles in her sleep. Her mom, who always kept up with her medications, probably couldn't find any of them right now.
So...so what did that mean? If she hadn't put those pills there...
She was out of bed and hurrying across the room, spotting the white lids that belonged to the medicine bottles scattered out over the floor as she went. Reaching those boxes, she began shoving them aside, away from the door, sending some of them skidding across the floor boards. The second the way was cleared enough, she pulled the door open so that she could slide out and then she was moving, shooting down the hallway, fear and dread pushing her along.
If she hadn't put those pills there... Then who in the name of hell had? And had they been placed there before or after the boxes had been stack up in front of the door?
Somehow, the thought of those stacked boxes terrified her even more than the sleeping pills because they could only have been put there by someone inside the room. And that meant either she'd done it herself or...
But, that was impossible. That kind of thing didn't happen, not in real life!
Then again, in real life, people didn't usually see their dead sister screaming in their face every time they turned around. In real life, people probably didn't see the faded, coal eyed leftovers of a young girl who'd been missing for a year. So, clearly, real life for her wasn't the same as it was for other people...
And what that boiled down to was that...someone...had tried to block her door from the inside...maybe in an effort to keep anyone from being able to get to her? And...someone...had left those pills by the bed...maybe in an effort to...send her a message?
The thought of what exactly that message might be had her pace quickening so that by the time she reached the kitchen, she was practically sprinting. Shoving through the door, she darted into the room, but slammed to a halt just inside, her gaze darting about, landing first on her mom standing by the stove and then on her dad, sitting at the table, involved in a conversation with Mr. Tanner and Matt. And sitting at the table with them...was Julian.
As one, five heads all turned toward her as she burst in, but it was Julian who jumped to his feet and rushed across to her, taking her by the shoulders and blocking out her view of the room behind him.
"Clydie? What's going on?" he asked roughly.
"Clydie? Is everything okay?" Ella questioned, her voice slightly too high pitched.
It was a tone that was easily recognizable. It was the one Ella used when she knew there was a problem, but she was hoping against hope that it wasn't bad enough to be brought to her attention. Hearing that dread in her mother's voice, Clydie felt a wave of defeat slam into her like a closed fist. This would be just one more thing heaped onto her parents' already heavily burdened shoulders. And for what? Her mother and father couldn't do a thing to help with this. This...whatever this was....was all on her.
"Clydie? What is it?" Frank's voice sounded out when she didn't answer, laced with a mixture of worry...and annoyance.
Clearing her throat, she answered in a shaky, breathy voice, keeping her gaze on Julian. "I-I'm okay. I...I just...I thought I overslept?"
"Nah. You didn't oversleep. I'm still making breakfast!" Ella announced, her words a bit easier. "I'm doing French toast this morning!"
A grimace passed over Julian's face and without a word, he spun her around and hustled her out of the room, moving her back up the hallway. "What's happened? You're as white as a sheet!" he said tightly.
She couldn't even put it into words, so instead, she took hold of his hand and led him through the house and up to her room. Once they'd pushed their way through the door, she walked them out into the middle of the space and waited for Julian to have a quick look around.
"Clydie? What's this all about? Why did you pile all that up in front of the door?" he questioned and she could tell just by his voice that he thought she'd done it to keep someone out.
"I-I didn't do that, Julian," she answered weakly "The boxes were in the middle of the room when I went to sleep and when I woke up...they were stacked up there, by the door."
Julian's expression became highly dubious as he looked down at her.
"And those were in here, too," she said, pointing to the medicine bottles sitting on the bedside table.
Julian glanced in that direction, pausing for a few beats, before striding over, picking up one of the bottles, and reading the label. "What are these?"
"Sleeping pills," she whispered and Julian whipped his gaze back to her, some of the color draining from his face.
"These were just...what? Sittin' here when you woke up? All the bottles opened just like this?" He then noticed the caps scattered out on the floor. "The lids strewn about like that?"
She nodded, feeling a knot forming in her throat.
"Clydie, you didn't...did you take any of these?" he asked dryly.
"No," she croaked. "If I had, I wouldn't be walking around right now."
She knew first hand the potency of the pills filling those bottles, which was why she'd stopped taking them a long time ago.
Julian stared at her for a long minute before speaking. "Are there any more of these in the house?"
"There's probably a lot more. My mom gets all the medicines I'm supposed to be taking re-filled every month," she told him.
A nerve in Julian's jaw began to tick. "Clydie, what do you think this means?"
She lifted her shoulders in a helpless way. "I-I have no idea. I mean...it looks like..."
"Like someone is tryin' to give you a hint?" Julian finished the thought, his voice as hard as nails.
Something cold snaked its way along her spine. Someone was trying to give her a hint. Someone wanted her to... What? Swallow a bunch of sleeping pills and...not wake up?
"Open the window," Julian suddenly ordered, snatching up the rest of the bottles.
Jerking into motion, she quickly obeyed, hurrying around the bed and unlatching the window, the chill morning wind whipping into the room as she pushed the double panes open, causing goosebumps to skitter across her skin. Julian appeared next to her, leaning out and dumping the contents of all the bottles, the tiny blue capsules getting caught up by the stout breeze and sent scattering out over the yard.
"Clydie, I don't know what's happening here, but I need a favor from you," Julian said, turning to her. "I need you to find any medicine that you aren't taking on an every day basis and I need you to give it to me. I want to make sure that its all gotten rid of."
"I-I will. But, everything is still in boxes and the rest of it could be anywhere," she said, shivering as the wind gusted past.
"Still in boxes? You aren't taking anything right now?" he wondered, drawing his brows together.
"Not right now," she replied, figuring they were way past the point of hemming and hawing. "I usually take a break in between trying new meds, to give my body time to cleanse."
"So, there are things other than sleeping pills in the house?" was Julian's next question.
"Yes. There are anti-depressants, anti-anxiety meds, anti-psychotics, mood stablizers—"
"And you just...stop taking all those? Is that safe?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. But, I get tired of walking around in a fog, so I just stop swallowing them until I feel...like swallowing them again."
Julian digested that bit of information for an instant. "Well, if we have to search every box in the house until we find all of it, that's what we'll do. I want every bottle of pills in my hands, as soon as possible."
"My mom might know where—"
"No, Clydie," Julian cut her off. "No. We...we need to keep this to ourselves for now."
That said, he turned and strode across the room and into the bathroom and she heard the empty bottles being dumped into the metal trash can there. As he reappeared and strode back over to her, she couldn't help but feel her spine stiffen.
"Julian...you think my parents had something to do with this," she said plainly.
"I'm not accusing anyone," he responded, taking hold of the window panes and pulling them closed, effectively shutting out the biting wind. "But, I'm also not convinced that human hands weren't involved in this."
"But...but, what about the boxes?" she asked. "They were stacked up from inside the room."
Letting out a breath, Julian put his arm around her shoulders and lead her over to the bed, where he sat them both down on the rumpled covers. "Clydie, please, listen to me," he began, reaching out to take both her hands in his, "I'm new here and I can't offer up an informed opinion as to what's really goin' on, but I...I also can't be too quick to blame it all on...ghosts."
Clydie felt herself pulling back from Julian. He thought she was crazy. Just like everyone else had always thought...
"No, no. Don't do that," he intoned, tightening his hands on hers. "I'm not saying its all in yer head, Clydie. I don't believe for one second that you don't have your mind about you."
"Then what are you saying?" she wondered, noting how large his hands were compared to her own...and rather wishing she hadn't noticed at all.
"I'm saying the mind is a complicated thing. And sometimes, it'll go to great lengths to protect us."
Clydie stared at him, confounded.
"This kind of thing happens with trauma victims. People who witness violent crimes or brutal murders, people who were abused during their childhood...sometimes, they block those things out because its too hard to process. And its nothing to be afraid of. Its natural to try and protect yourself from somethin' you might not want to face."
She felt her breath beginning to quicken. "You really believe my parents would have put those sleeping pills there?"
Julian offered a shrug. "I believe its probable. Maybe more probable than a...a ghost leaving the bottles there. I mean, it is possible that one of your parents came into your room during the night and put the pills by the bed. It is possible that you saw them. Maybe you were half asleep and half dreaming. But, you saw them. And in an effort to protect yourself, you placed those boxes in front of the door."
"Julian, that didn't happen," she told the man, torn between wanting to laugh...and wanting to cry. "You've got the wrong idea about my parents. They wouldn't do that to me. I mean...they just wouldn't."
Even as the words left her, she found herself wishing they'd come out with a bit more certainty.
Julian looked at her for a long moment, his thumbs beginning to trace slow circles on the backs of her hands. "Can I be honest with you?"
She heard herself huff out a heavy breath. "Its a little late for bullshit now, don't you think?"
It was Julian's turn to sigh. "Yer folks have been through a lot since your sister passed away, haven't they? And yesterday, after the sheriff's visit...after what you told them about Sam and those other girls... I saw their faces, Clydie. And I hate to say it, but some people can only bear so much before they have to...find a way out of the situation."
Clydie went still as she took in Julian's words. He was absolutely sincere in what he was saying. And it was obvious that he was concerned about her. And a part of her couldn't help but agree that her mom and dad...felt differently about her now. She'd even go so far as to say that, at the moment, her dad hated her for what she'd done to he and Ella.
But, her parents simply would not do that to her. Not after they'd already lost one daughter.
She couldn't blame Julian for trying to find a rational explanation for whatever was going on, but hearing the rational side of things only seemed to drive home the fact that she...was inclined to believe the exact opposite.
She simply could not say, with any amount of conviction, that human hands had anything to do with the sleeping pills or the stacked boxes. However, she did firmly believe that...someone...was trying to leave her a not so subtle hint...
Seeing that she wasn't on board with his theory, Julian let out another breath. "Alright, let's shelf talking about who left the pills in here and get down to finding the rest of them. No matter who's behind this, they can't do anything with them if they've all been removed from the house."
That was a point that he would get no argument on. "I'll find them. But, if I can't ask my mom, it might take a while."
Julian gave a nod. "In the meantime, I think it'd be wise to go on like everything is fine and normal. So, just act like you never found the pills to start with."
"I will. I always try to keep my parents out of everything as much as I can, anyway," she told him. "If the sheriff hadn't shown up here, I never would have told them about Jessica Hyatt...or Sam."
"Clydie, I want you to know that I do believe you're seeing something that the rest of us can't," he told her seriously, continuing to trace circles on her hands. "And I do believe there's a reason you're seeing that missing girl. But, I also don't want you to assume that there's something otherworldly behind everything that happens."
She actually wasn't in the habit of blaming anything on something otherworldly. Before Jessica Hyatt had shown up, she would have blamed herself for the sleeping pills and the boxes. She might even have started to think that she was trying to talk herself into ending it all, just so she could finally see a little peace. She'd been thinking that way a lot over the past months, anyway.
Now, though, she saw things a bit differently.
What was happening wasn't a product of her broken mind. She didn't need to be medicated or locked away. She didn't need everyone around her telling her that she was crazy...because she wasn't.
She was seeing what was left of three girls...and she now feared those girls had managed to barricade her bedroom door and leave the sleeping pills by her bed.
When it came down to it, she was just as much in the dark about what those girls really wanted from her as Matt and Julian were. They could be coming to her for any reason out of millions of reasons. Or they could be coming to her for no real reason at all... They could simply be tormenting her because...she could see them and they could.
And though she'd like to think that Sam wouldn't want to hurt her, she couldn't quite forget the fact that, in her last moments, Sam hadn't been herself. Sam hadn't been the loving, caring big sister she'd always been. Sam...had tried to kill her. So, maybe...maybe that was the part of Sam that was left now. Maybe Sam...or what was left of Sam...wanted to finish what she'd started the day she'd tried to kill them both. And maybe she'd recruited a couple of friends to help her get the job done...
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