Well hello there.

I am continuing from where April left off, at the top of a cliff with James and herself and a bear attempting to communicate as to the whereabouts of a creature called 'Audrey'.

Sadly, we have no idea what an Audrey looks like.

We do, however, know why the bear wasn't communicating.

It's because this bear wasn't just a bear, but a British bear. 

But there aren't any bears in Bri-

Shhhhhh *muffles James with pillow*

So *sips tea and sits at table with scones and cakes because here in Britain we love cakes*

*so many of us are overweight*

*original words, but toned down a bit. If I went full British it would be unintelligible*

Why hello there, Mr Bear. I must say you're looking simply utterly dashing in that fur coat. Would you care for some scones? Made to perfection I must assure you. Ah, we have nothing to talk about, so let's talk about the weather, which never really changes.

The weatherman said that Tuesday was going to be simply spitting down with rain, didn't he? and yet it was quite wonderful. April and I went to Stourhaven, just up the road from Newcastle. You know that laybay from the M3 and the A24? The one with the broken bin and the minis for sale? Yes, there's a turn-off about 19 and a half yards on from- would you like some more scones?- there, and a simply lovely little English Heritage site. Parking was quite cramped, of course, but we got a little corner spot, under a tree. The castle was beautifully quaint. Had a pond, with ducks (mallards, mostly), and people walking around in waistcoats and corsets, because that's all we do in England. A little cider-making windmill, too, which was open. Had a wonderful- allow me to pour you some more tea- picnic. Simply heaven. Stourhaven has the most dear little town. Quite peaceful, I can assure you. None of that traffic bussiness. After that, we proceeded onto the train (a proper one, nothing like the new ones), and had a day in Chalk Vale. It had a History festival, you know. Oh, you've been there? Wonderful. Quite, quite wonderful.

Translation:

Hello, you're looking very nice. D'you want something to eat? Scones? They're really nice. I've run out of things to talk about, but since this is Britain and British people talk about the weather loads (and I mean loads) let's talk about that.

Tuesday was meant to be quite rainy but it wasn't, my friend and I went and had a picnic in Stourhaven. It's really nice there. You've been there? Wow. 

[three hours later of this kind of talking later, Owen has managed to locate the location of an Audrey]

Anyway, she's gone West.

*points dramatically*

I- yes, go away, barney- we must go- I said shut up, barney- that way, and- what do you mean I'm pointing east?

*points the other way* this way of course. Barney, barney, please don't mislead me like that again *gives them a light tap with a shovel* honestly. Some of us do all the work here.

Um. Sasha, you carry Barney. I may have hit her just a bit too hard.

What do you mean he's dead?

*sigh* so inconsiderate.

Alright, Audrey. We need to find an Audrey. *takes out map* West. We need to go West. *sets off*

[the next day, in.... America, for some reason.]

Where are we? Hm?

Barney did you lead us wrong?

(Barney doesn't reply)

So inconsiderate. Some of us do all the work in this team. Right, seeing as I know next to nothing about America (other than the civil war and the civilisation), Barney you go show us where to go next. Being a dead body is no excuse for not doing work.