"'Wag ka munang pumasok sa school, Xia."

I sighed and just nod. We're here at the balcony, awkwardly talking. Nang malaman nila kung anong nangyari kanina sa school, pinauwi kaagad nila ako. And now, they won't let me go to school.

"Nasaan si Papa, Ma?" I asked her. She's having her coffee. I can see that she's thinking deeply.

"He's fixing his mess." She simply answered. "Don't mind it that much." Bumalik na siya sa pag-iisip.

"Ma, do you think he's innocent? I mean, Papa. Do you think he can't do such things like that?" I slowly said, yo make her understand where I am coming.

"I don't know the answer, Xia. Just---just go to your room, please?" I bite my lip and nod. Nakabihis na pa naman ako ng pampasok pero mukhang hindi talaga ako papayagan.

I decided to just lock myself in my room. Wala akong magawa sa loob ng kwartong ito. Hindi naman ako mahilig magbukas ng social media. At hindi ako magbubukas ng social media ngayon. 

From: Blake
You didn't attend school. Are you sure you're okay? What happened?

From: Blake
Is it because of the case yesterday? I hope you're okay. Please, reply.

From: Blake
Did you eat already? 'Wag mong gutumin ang sarili mo. I love you.

I can't help but to smile. He's just so caring. On the other side, natatakot ako. Nakakatakot na baka madamay siya sa nangyayari sa pamilya ko. I just replied that I am okay and my parents just didn't let me attend school.

Nakatulog pala ako. Hindi ko man lang namalayan. Inaayos ko muna ang higaan ko saka lumabas ng kwarto. I looked for my mother but I think she left.

Where did she go? I thought we shouldn't go outside?

I just go to the kitchen to find myself a food. Nagugutom na kasi ako. Kaunti lang ang kinain ko 'nung umagahan. Tiningnan ko ang fridge pero prutas lang ang nakita ko. Maging sa mga compartment, mga noodles at canned goods lang ang nakita ko. Mukhang wala akong ibang choice kundi ang kumain ng prutas. Hindi ko pa naman alam magluto. Nakakatawa pero oo. Hindi ako marunong magluto. Last na niluto ko ay pritong itlog pero nang lumabas ay mukha na itong inihaw.

Mansanas na lang ang kinuha ko since ito lang naman ang madaling kainin na prutas, eh. Tumunganga lang ako habang kumakain, iniisip ang mangyayari sa mga susunod pang araw. Hangga't hindi napapatunayang guilty o hindi si Papa, damay kami. Kahit wala siyang ginawa, madadamay kami. Gan'on naman talaga ang tao; kung anong puno, siya ang bunga. Kapag sakim ang pamilya mo, sakim ka na rin. Unfair pero hindi ko naman sila kayang sabihan. Ang magagawa ko lang ay tanggapin at itapon.

Magtatanghali na pero wala pa rin sila Mama. Wala ring tao sa buong bahay, I wonder where the people here are. They just vanished? Ilang oras lang naman akong natulog.

Kung ano-ano pang pinaggagawa ko para lang makalimutan na may issue pala ang magaling kong ama. Ayoko muna isipin ang mga bagay na 'yun. I'm too young to be stressed with those kind of cases.

Nagbeep na naman ang phone ko, ibig sabihin ay may nagsent ng message. Inubos ko muna ang kinakain ko saka tiningnan kung sino ang nagpadala ng message. Again, it's from Blake. He's asking me again about my situation, if I am fine or if I eat already.

From: Blake
It's our breaktime, can I call? I'll call

Saktong pagkasend niya 'non ay tumawag na agad siya, and worst, video call. Tiningnan ko muna sa salamin kung maayos pa ba ang mukha ko bago ko ito sinagot.

"Hi." Nakita ko pang nilapag nito sandali ang cellphone niya.

"Si Xia ba 'yan? Kamusta kamo, si Reese 'to!" Mahina akong tumawa nang tinulak ni Blake si Reese nang makikisingit sana ito. "Pakadamot, mangangamusta lang eh. Hi, Xia!"

"Mamaya ka na. Let us talk first, bruh!" Muling humarap si Blake sa camera at ngumiti.

"What do you want?" I asked him. Tumawa pa ito saka nangalumbaba sa harapan ko, hindi pa rin inaalis ang tingin sa akin. Hindi naman siya nagsasalita, eh. Nakatitig lang. "You're wasting my data balance, Blake." I rolled my eyes on him.

"It's fine. I can send you load, later if you want." He ruffled his hair.

"Ubos na din ata load ko, pre, baka naman."

"Shut up." Mukhang hindi makapagfocus si Blake kaya binitbit niya na lang ang phone at nakita kong naglalakad ito. Lumayo pa sa kaibigan niya, seryoso? "There, there, baby, can you hear me?"

"Yeah."

Kinausap niya lang ako buong free hours niya. Wala din naman daw silang gagawin sa room kaya ayos lang sa kanya. He throw jokes just to make me laugh. I still laugh, though his jokes are so corny.

"I'll call you again, later, hmm?" I just nod at him. Nilapit niya pa ang kamay niya sa screen at hindi ko naman alam ang ginawa niya. He smiled. " I love you."

"Yeah, me too."

The conversation ended up like that. I am smiling all the time. Nakalimutan ko saglit na may crisis nga palang hinaharap ang pamilya namin kaya gan'on din kabilis nawala ang sayang naramdaman ko.

"Ma!"

Napatayo ako nang biglang pumasok si Mama sa bahay. Hindi ako nito pinansin at nagmamadaling pumunta sa itaas. Pagbaba nito ay may dala siyang isang maliit na bag.

"M-Ma, sa'n ka pupunta?" Iiwan niya ba ako? I hold her arm that's why she looked at me. Nabitawan ko ito nang makitang namumula ang mga mata niya, mukhang kagagaling lang sa pag-iyak. "A-Anong nangyari?"

"Xia, let's talk about it later. I am in hurry right now. Y-Your brother...h-he's on the hospital." After that, she started walking again.

What? Si Ben? Nasa hospital? Hindi na ako nakapag-isip ng maayos at dali-dali na lang akong sumunod sa kanya. Hindi ko na pinansin kung anong suot ko, ang mahalaga, malaman ko kung anong nangyari kay Ben.

Hindi ko na rin magawang matanong si Mama dahil mukhang malalim ang iniisip nito. Thank God, we've reach the hospital safely. Ang bilis pa namang magpatakbo ni Mama. Ang lakas ng pintig ng puso ko sa hindi malamang dahilan. I'm so worried about my brother.

Sinundan ko lang ng sinundan si Mama hanggang sa makarating kami sa ER ng hospital. Dumoble ang kabang nararamdaman ko dahil 'dun. I hope he's fine. I hope he's okay.

"D-Doc, how's my son? Is he fine? Tell me he's fine." My mother immediately approach the doctor when it goes out. Napasunod ulit ako. The doctor sighed.

"He's okay, Mrs. Quiroz. Inatake lang siya kanina ng hika niya dahil marahil sa maraming nakapalibot sa kanya, ayon sa kwento niyo." Both of us sighed in relief. He's fine. Ben's fine! "Claustrophobic ba ang anak niyo? Isa rin kasi 'yun sa possible reason kung bakit siya kinapos ng hininga."

"I-I don't know. Ang alam ko lang, may respiratory disorder siya and 'yun nga, 'yung hika. I don't know if he has Claustrophobia." My mother explain. The doctor nod at us.

"Ililipat na lang namin siya sa kwarto."

"Salamat po."

Napaupo ako sa waiting area ng ER. Grabe 'yung kaba na naramdaman ko. Pakiramdam ko'y aatakihin din ako. Mabuti na lang at nasa mabuting lagay na siya.

Gaya nga ng sabi ng doctor, inilipat na siya ng kwarto. Private room ang inirikomenda sa amin ng doctor na kunin dahil sa kaso ni Ben. Ang may mga problema kasi sa paghinga ay hindi pwedeng isama sa mga simpleng room lang.

Naka-antabay lang kami sa paggising ni Ben. Mom is on his side while I am watching them from the couch.

"What happened to Ben?"

Nagulat ako nang bigla na lang pumasok si Papa sa loob. Napatingin ito sa akin pero umiwas din ng tingin at binaling sa natutulog kong kapatid.

"Nakita ko na lang siyang pinalilibutan at pinagtatawanan ng mga bata, malamang ay tinutukso siya dahil sa isyung kinasasangkutan mo." Mom's grip on Ben's hand tightened. "See how your action affect your child?"

"I will file a report on that school." His fist turn into ball. He's mad. May pake pala siya. "They shouldn't tolerate those kind of actions."

Lumabas na lang muna ako ng room na 'yun para magpalamig. And, I can't look at my father. May nagngangalit sa loob ko kapag nakikita ko siya. He's the reason why Ben is in that situation.

Nang kapain ko ang bulsa ko, nakalimutan ko pala ang cellphone ko. Hapon na rin naman kaya hindi ko na lang inabala ang sarili ko na kunin 'yun. Uuwi naman kami mamayang gabi.

Saktong paglabas ni Papa, ay ang balak kong pagpasok. Nakakahiya kasi pambahay lang ang suot ko kaya mas mabuting sa loob na lang ako. Pinasadahan lang ako nito ng tingin at walang sali-salita na nilagpasan ako kaya napahinga ako ng maluwag. I don't want to hear anything from him. Not now. Not until the result is given.

Nakita kong nakaupo na muli si Mama sa tabi ni Ben na noon ay natutulog pa rin. Tunog lang ng aircon ang maririnig sa loob. Pati na rin 'yung aparatos na may green lines. May nakakabit din sa kanya na oxygen mask.

Bumalik na lang ako sa upuan ko kanina at tahimik na nagdasal na sana ay gumising na siya. Kahit naman hindi kami masyadong close na 'yan, kapatid ko pa rin siya. May pake pa rin ako sa kanya.

Nakatulog pala ako sa paghihintay. Ang sakit ng braso ko! Pati ang batok ko dahil nakadukdok ako sa lamesa. Naramdaman kong may humimas ng buhok ko kaya napatingin ako dito.

Gano'n na lang ang gulat ko nang makita si Blake. Palihim ko pang kinurot ang braso ko pero nandito talaga siya.

"You're awake. Are you hungry?"

"Anong oras na?" 'Yan ang unang lumabas sa bibig ko. Napatingin ako sa kapatid kong natutulog pa rin. I sighed. Hindi pa rin siya nagigising.

"Uhm, it's seven in the evening." He said. I cleared my throat and awkwardly fix my hair.

"B-Bakit ka nandito? Pa'no mo nalaman na nandito ako?" I asked him.

"Your mother told me. I went to your house and she found me there. You're not replying on my messages that's why." Sinimulan niyang hiwain ang mansanas na nasa lamesa. "I'm sorry for what happened to your brother. Are you alright?"

I don't how many times he said that in just a day. He is asking that everytime yet my answers are always the same. I am okay.

"Your brother will be fine. He's a great boy." He's talking as if he met my brother already. "Here. Eat. You need energy. Baka ikaw naman ang sumunod sa kapatid mo dahil sa kakapagutom mo." He glared at me. I pursed my lips.

"Busog pa ak---,"

"No, you're not. You're tummy says otherwise." He grinned. My eyes widen. Tumunog pa ang tyan ko kanina habang natutulog?

Sa huli, napagdesisyunan kong kumain na lang. Hindi rin naman ako patatahimikin ni Blake kapag hindi ako kumain. Napansin kong nakapangpasok pa ito kaya sinabihan ko siyang umuwi na.

"But I want to stay here. I want to stay here with you." He pleaded.

"No. Umuwi ka na. Gabi na, baka hinahanap ka na ng magulang mo. Atsaka hindi ka pa nagbibihis." I snorted. Alam niyang kapag nakasimangot na ako, wala na siyang magagawa kundi ang sundin ako. "I am fine and if you're not convinced, sige, kung gusto mo, bumalik ka dito bukas. Or text me if you want." His eyes glistened with happiness on what I said.

"Really?" He asked and hugged me. "Okay. I'll go home now. Gonna message you later! And please, eat, okay? I love you." He kissed my forehead before leaving the room.

I was left there, in the room with nothing but silence. Nakatingin lang ako sa nakaratay na katawan ni Ben, nagbabakasakaling kapag tinitigan ito ay magigising.

"M-Ma..."

"Ben! Ben, gising ka na." Agad akong napatayo at lumapit sa kanya. Gising na nga siya! Naglilikot ang mata nito sa buong silid, marahil ay nagtataka kung bakit siya naririto. "M-May masakit ba sa'yo? N-Nagugutom ka ba? Wait lang ha? Tatawag lang si ate ng doct---," I stopped when his gripped on my arms tightened.

"'W-Wag..." He can't even utter a word. He is just shaking his head. He can't let me go.

"Titingnan ka ng doctor, okay? They'll check if you're fine. Tatawagan ko na rin si Mama." I caressed his hair. I smiled when his gripped soften. "Wait lang, ha?"

I go out to look for some hospital stuffs. Nurses or doctors. Kahit na nahihiya akong i-approach sila, thankfully I did.

"Doc! Uh...g-gising na po 'yung kapatid ko. Benedict Quiroz po." He nodded at me and lead his way to my brother's room. Nakahiga pa rin ito pero ngayon, may malay na. 

The doctor check him up. Tinanong lang nito ang nararamdaman niya, kung may masakit ba rito o ano, habang ako naman ay nakatayo lang sa may bandang pintuan, pinapanood sila.

"Where's your mother?" The doctor asked me. Kanina pa wala si Mama, mukhang may inaasikaso pa sa bahay.

"Nasa bahay po siya. Siguro papunta na rin po 'yun dito." I simply answered and glance at Ben who's now looking at me. He nodded at me again and remind me to tell my mother that they have to talk about Ben's case.

"Hi." I pulled the chair and sat beside Ben's bed. Sinita ko ito nang subukan niyang tanggalin ang mask na nakakabit sa kanya. "Don't. You need that." I said.

"I-It's annoying..." He still tried to remove it but because of his weak state, he can't. Napahawak pa siya sa bandang dibdib niya kaya naalarma na naman ako. Pinigilan niya na naman ako nang aalis na sana ako. "I'm fine. It just hurts here." He pointed at his chest.

"Magpahinga ka muna, hmm? Gigisingin na lang kita kapag dumating na si Mama." I caressed his hair again to relaxed him.

"A-Ate..." He looked at me with teary-eyed. "I'm sleepy..." I bite my lip because his voice cracked. I removed all the bad things in my mind. Stop thinking those things, Xia. "I-I want to see...Mom. Tell her I want to see her..." He tugged my shirt.

"I will tell her, okay? You will see her so you need to regain your energy so you can play with her again like before." I smiled at him.

"Or if ever she didn't make it, t-tell her I love her very much. More than chocolates." He closed his eyes. My hands trembled as I went to touch him. "P-Papa, even there's times that he's angry to me, I still love him. I protect him from those kids who called him monster. H-He is not a monster. My Papa is not a monster."

"Ben..."

"Ate, hindi ko pa m-maranasang makarinig ng kwento mula sa'yo..." He looked at me and now, his tears are running through his face. "Lagi na lang si Mama ang n-nagkukuwento sa akin ng mga stories bago ako matulog. Would it be too much i-if I request you to tell me a s-story?"

"Ben...what are you saying?"

"A-Ate, one lang. One story lang." Pinunasan ko ang luha niya sa mata saka tumango. Dumaan naman ang saya sa mukha niya.

"When dinosaurs still existing, there was a boy who's name is Ben. He is so brave and smart. He fights monsters who tries to eat his family." I sniffed. Amusement is all I can see in Ben's eyes as he listens to my story. "One day, he is on fight with those monsters. Even though he is so weak, he still defended his family." I wiped my tears away.

"H-He is so brave, ate. I want t-to be like him. I w-want to protect our family also." He said on a low voice, half asleep.

"You don't have to be like him, Ben. You are brave enough." Sabi ko habang patuloy pa rin ang pagbuhos ng luha. "He won against the monster."

"T-Tell me, did h-he and his family live happily ever a-after?" He asked in hoping voice.

"Yes. They live happily ever after." I closed my eyes and let the tears to fall.

"Wow, that is such a-an amazing story, a-ate. I h-hope to hear more stories from you but now, I-I will sleep. I am happy that h-he and his f-family live happily...ever after."

That night, after fulfilling his first and last request for me, he passed away. Ben past away because of respiratory failure.

He didn't reach his happily ever after.