Gone Baby Gone

David burst into Grove Road and tore upstairs, as quickly as his legs would take him. He knew what he would find in Fiona's room but he had to be sure. The room was bare. No letter, no mixtape. All her things had gone. He ran from room to room checking for any sign that she was there or clue to where she had gone to. Bill made a cup of tea and filled Dan, Richard and Emlyn in on what happened at the wedding.

"You know what's funny? The Thursday before you all left for the wedding, she loaded her car about ten times." Dan mused. "I thought she was clearing out for Boston moving in. She told me she was off to Oxfam with a load of stuff."

"What did you do this time?", Richard asked grabbing a biscuit from the tin plonking into the chair next to Dan.

"Nothing, it was all great, we had a great time, then she just up and left." David shook his head. He was truly at a loss.

"We spoke with her ex and that's what she did with him. Just up and left. Vanished." Bill sighed. He looked up and saw the rest of the housemates looking at him expectantly.

"Oh god no! Don't look at me like that! Heather actually didn't know this time. She is absolutely not going to crack. Perhaps..., you could both try your girlfriends?" he pointed to Richard and Dan.

"Nope she is my fiancée now, I will give her a crack but I can't promise!" Richard grinned.

"Goodness me! You too...?" David slapped Richard on the back. He was happy for Richard. He saw it coming with Lyn. Richard was always a little more one man woman than the rest of them.

"Yup two down - I need to ask Ninj to fix me up," Emms sighed, "that is if I saw her of course." He scrunched up has face. He let it out of the bag. His nuts would be in a bag left outside for the squirrels. Emlyn dropped his gaze and returned to reading the paper. He felt the eyes of everyone in the room staring at him. He looked up. "Shit! She said she would castrate me if I blabbed."

"Blab." David said flatly in his I am not angry, absolutely furious voice.

"Shiiiit," Emlyn looked at his shoes, "look, I saw her today. Of all places, I saw her charging across the garden from the path at the back towards Jilly's. I shouted out of the window did she want a cuppa and she just froze. I kind of asked what the problem was and she came to the window and sort of gave an explanation and a goodbye."

"What?" They all said in unison, staring at Emlyn.

"She said she was going away at the end of the month, she was heartbroken over lover boy here and that she would be in touch but to kind of say goodbye to everyone." He nodded to David.

"Did she say where she was staying?" David asked. He needed to know.

"Nope, she said not to look either. I suppose she was saying goodbye to Jilly." Emlyn completely missed out that he actually saw her when he was leaving Jilly's this afternoon. He and Jilly had just finished a cracking morning of carnal lust filled pleasure when Fiona knocked on Jilly's door.

"Then let's speak to Jilly shall we?" David left the kitchen and ran outside to Jilly's flat. He battered on the door for a few minutes until he heard Jilly sigh and open the door.

"Ah, the wanderer has returned!" She stood with a glass of rose wine in her hand. "What can I do for you, Boston?"

"Where is she?" He pleaded.

"Not telling," she answered flatly. David opened his mouth to speak and she raised her hand to quieten him. "Don't waste your breath. I have been asked not to tell, so I am not and that is that. Also, let's be fair Boston you have been a total knob, she is not the type to do that to is she?" Jilly laid it out on the line.

"Can I come in Jilly, I need your advice. I..oh shit Jilly I fucked it up didn't I?" David knew he had. He was so stupid to think he could walk back in where he had left off.

"Oh, go on then!" Jilly knew the coast was clear. Perhaps David chatting through the issues would knock some sense into the pair of them.

Jilly stood back from the door as David swept past her. Jilly's flat was large and airy with a kitchen and living room at the back which had patio doors on to the large garden at the rear. David surreptitiously looked around to see if he could see any sign of Fiona, when none was to be found he headed to the kitchen and dropped into one of the kitchen chairs, throwing his face into has hands. 

"I fucked up royally didn't I?" He sighed into his hands.

"Yes, yes you did." Jilly shook her head.

Jilly opened the fridge and poured them both a large glass of white wine and pushed the glass in front of David."

"For the record Boston, I had no idea she had planned this. Before the wedding, she was looking forward to seeing you and you coming back to the house. She was clear that you would just be friends and I knew that was a lot of crap!" It was true. Fiona kept the finer details of what she was up to herself.

Jilly lit a cigarette and blew smoke at David which made him cough and look up at her.

"You," she said probing the air with her cigarette, "have no idea what she was up to either I suspect."

David nodded. Jilly looked deep in thought, she sipped her wine and turned back to David.

"Then you will have to wait for her to come to her senses." It was true. Fiona was acting impulsively. 

David nodded and sighed, "Look, if you see her tell her.., I am lost, I can't end it like this. Tell her I have a massive gaping hole in me, I feel like I have lost my arm or something. Tell her I physically ache for her. Tell her that I see her everywhere, I mean right here and now I can smell her, what is that about? Tell her I will never ever do anything like that again."  David meant every word. He drained the glass of wine and made for Jilly's front door. Jilly stood next to him.

"My advice Boston, if it is worth anything don't do anything stupid and by stupid I mean fuck the half of London that you haven't, or refuck the ones you have. The worst possible situation that could arise is that she comes to her senses and you have your dick in someone else. I think that is where her ex made his mistake." That was the best piece of advice she could muster.

Jilly hugged David and closed the front door, she watched him go into the house. She heard the fridge door open and a glass of wine being poured.

"Well?" She asked Fiona. Fiona drained the glass of wine and refilled.

"Shit Jilly," Fiona sniffed, "it took every fibre of my being to stay in that room. I wanted to throw myself at him and gallop off into the sunset."

"Uh huh, and you didn't because?" Jilly found all of this a little tedious.

"Because I am not in my right mind. I am thinking with my heart and not my head. What is to say that in a few weeks some other bloody supermodel comes along and I end up back here?"

"Nothing, there is no guarantees in life darling. If it happens wouldn't you have a lovely time in between?" The follies of young people.

"True, though I am not willing for another bought of humiliation too soon Jilly." she sighed, "Can I stay for another hour, and then I will sneak out and go back to my new place."

"Of course darling make yourself at home. I am having a spliff and then I have a rendezvous with a lovely chap about seven. If I am out just let yourself out darling." Jilly kissed Fiona on the forehead. "Just remember darling wonderful doesn't come round every day."

Fiona finished her glass, grabbed her bag and slipped out of the patio doors. The wine rushed to her head on her empty stomach, she quickly glimpsed over her shoulder and snuck a look at Grove Road. She immediately felt her eyes swim with tears, she saw its Grandeur and the warmth it generated. Her gaze moved to David's window. She wondered what he was thinking now. Was he truly as remorseful as he sounded earlier?

She had been so very happy at Grove Road in the year she lived there. She mended one broken heart and gave herself another one. She would miss everyone there when she made her move to Jersey, having seen the accommodation there she knew it would never be as homely or as fun as Grove Road. She had been given a small cottage and she would be living alone for the first time in about five years. 

She skipped through the gate and dashed down the alleyway towards Fulham Road. She found the bus stop to take her to Shepherds Bush. One of her colleagues was selling a house, her tenants had moved out, however, there was a month or so before the sale and Fiona agreed to house sit. She waited for the bus, mulling over David's words, Jilly's advice and reflecting on how she planned her escape this time. So deep in her thoughts that she nearly missed the bus.

Fiona sought a seat at the back and took her headphones out of her bag and tried to get the music she brought, get over the yank tape 2 (tapes 1 and 3 all made in May 1995), to drown out the hurricane of thoughts in her head. She looked out of the window as the bus sped past all of the local haunts she had frequented with her housemates, The Stargazey, The Sporting Page, The Goat in Boots and Vingt Quatre. Her heart tugged as she thought about all of the fun she had in each of the venues and how much she would miss them moving away.

As the bus turned up towards South Kensington she gave a sigh so loud two of the fellow passengers turned around and tutted. She thought about her new job and her new life, trying desperately to block out the thoughts of David. She mused on the thought that it was far easier the last time, she was able to block Paul out with less difficulty. Was that because she didn't feel it was over with David? She knew she was still in love with him. She was certain he was as upset as she was. The only point of uncertainty was could he do it to her again and would she stay around to let him.

Once at Shepherd's Bush Green she alighted and walked down Loftus Road towards Percy Road, a row of dilapidated Victorian houses. The flat was empty save her belongings, which would soon be going into storage for shipping to Jersey. She made herself a cup of tea, went into her room and flopped onto the bed. She then promptly burst into tears, took the duvet, placed it over her head and tried her best to slip into some sleep.

David lay in his bed looking at the ceiling. He had the mixtape she had given him when he left for Boston, on in the background. As Blur To the End, blasted out he mused on what she had said. Why had he been so sure she would have him back. Why indeed, had the lure of Grace been so much that he forgot her in an instance. 

He turned over the thoughts in his mind. He wondered if she was somewhere in this great city, thinking and longing for him as much as he was for her. He took heed of Jilly's warning. As much as he wanted to get under another woman, to get over Fiona, it would be the worst thing he could do right at this moment.

Fiona placed David's mixtape on her Walkman. She lay on the futon in the dilapidated room. Mel looked at her judgingly, Brad was sulky. Flaming June looked paler than she had in Grove Road. Her eyes swam in the tears, her heart was going to burst with pain. Self inflicted pain.

So thoughts? Is David growing up?

Is Fiona being too stubborn?

What would you do?

Well int he meantime you could vote and comment??? See what I did there?