Okay, give me a moment, if you will. I need to laugh at the joke in the title.

*Laughs hysterically for five minutes straight*.

Right, right, okay. I'm done ... or am I?

Now then, let's get down to business. Justin Bieber is the new King Of Pop. Your next joke is what, exactly?

C'mon now, guys. Let's get real here.

I don't even know how you can put Justin and Michael's names in the same sentence (apart from this one which is an exception).

They're of two completely different classes.

Of course, I have to take into consideration that a lot of people are fans of Justin Bieber, and he is famous so we should acknowledge that.

However, I dislike him strongly, and I always have done. Hell, I even disliked him before everyone else decided to, and that's no lie or exaggeration!

Nevertheless, we're not here to talk about my opinion on him. We're here to talk about ... this madness.

Who, in their right mind, decided to start the whole "Justin Bieber is the new King Of Pop" business, heh? Whoever it is, I would like to take Michael's glitter glove and slap it right across your face.

First of all ... Justin's music compared to Michael? Man, I know it's a matter of opinion, but even non-Moonwalkers (excluding Beliebers) have to say Michael's music is better than his.

Secondly ... why Justin? You could at least choose someone with a decent voice, like ... I dunno ... *Tries to think of someone that comes close to Michael*. I got nothing. Help me out here guys?

Okay, sure, Justin Bieber is somewhat popular in the modern world. But that doesn't make him the heir to the Pop Throne, does it?

No. Michael will always have that spot. Justin, maybe you could try for Palace Floor Cleaner or something. You're just not cut out to be heir to the Pop Throne.

People seem to forget that Justin hasn't had a perfect career either. Now, as much as I can't stand Justin Bieber, I must say that he has had a decent past of helping those less fortune than ourselves, but ...

What about the fact he was arrested?

I heard he also ... don't quote me on this cos I don't know ... spat on his fans or something?

I've heard a lot of bad things about him. How does that make him fit to be any kind of King?

He's still a boy. He needs to grow up a little first.

After all ...

Boys have swag.

Men have class.

You need class to be a King, and Michael had class running through his veins.

Seriously, non-Moonwalkers, if you EVER tell a Moonwalker that Justin Bieber will be the next King Of Pop, I shall personally Moonwalk to your house (I'll find out where you live. Not just a Moonwalker – but a Moonstalker too, heheh), smash your bedroom window like the basket ball from Jam, and go Thriller right on your ass.

Clear?

Good!

Just be careful what you do ... don't go around breaking Moonwalkers' hearts (HEEEEE-EEEE? No? Okay).

Lord, help me. Justin is NOT the King Of Pop, neither will he ever be.

Rant over.

Peace.✌🏻️